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10-21-2009, 08:52 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Colorado
Posts: 109
| Advice
Hello all, Need advice. I have a friend whose daughter is an alcoholic. My friend called me this morning and told me that her daughter has relapsed again. My friend is devastated, as she has paid for her daughter to go to rehab several times and the daughter has ended up relapsing each time. My friend asked me about Al-Anon and I explained how the program works and sent her the web address. I offered to go with her to her first meeting if she wanted me to. Is this overstepping? I think that the correct way to handle this is just to step away from it now and stay out of it. If she ask me to go with her to a meeting I will, but now I'm wondering if I'm breaking Al-Anon's privacy rule? Is it ok to go to a meeting with someone you know who has never been? I don't want my codepedancy issues to come into play here and just thought that posting on here could help me stay on track of keeping my side of the street clean. Thanks in advance for any advice that is provided to me. Take Care. |
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10-21-2009, 09:44 AM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: In the barn
Posts: 239
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I think your instinct to step back is a good instinct. You are wise to recognize how the desire to 'help' might play out with your own recovery issues.
__________________ ~*~*~*~*~*~*~* A goal is not a plan Hope is not a strategy |
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| The Following User Says Thank You to Cowgirl1265 For This Useful Post: | CNMC2C (10-21-2009) |
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10-21-2009, 01:08 PM
| #3 (permalink) | |
| The New Me starting 1/11/09  Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: California
Posts: 257
| Quote:
__________________ The New Me as of 1/11/09 Still searching for that darn wisdom to know the difference. Do you know where I can find some? | |
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| The Following User Says Thank You to me11109 For This Useful Post: | CNMC2C (10-21-2009) |
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10-21-2009, 01:17 PM
| #4 (permalink) |
| peaceful seabird  Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: floating
Posts: 1,539
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You did good CNMC2C. I agree with the others, sharing about Alanon is a great way to offer help to another person dealing with Alcoholism. Stepping back and letting her decide what to do with that information is the next healthy choice. You caught yourself before you got all codie and scheduled what time to pick her up and drop her off after the next meeting LOL.
__________________ "How does one become a butterfly?" she asked pensively. "You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar." Trina Paulus Hope for the Flowers |
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| The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Pelican For This Useful Post: | CNMC2C (10-21-2009), peaceteach (10-21-2009) |
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10-21-2009, 01:21 PM
| #5 (permalink) |
| College Student Extraordinaire  Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Kansas
Posts: 4,931
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I think offering to go with her to her first meeting if she does want to go is a wonderful idea. I'd even opt for a couple of meetings with her. I know for me, a big part of my recovery is reaching out to others in need who may also want recovery for themselves. 
__________________ DeVon & the Zoo Crew |
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| The Following User Says Thank You to Freedom1990 For This Useful Post: | CNMC2C (10-21-2009) |
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10-21-2009, 02:59 PM
| #6 (permalink) | |
| Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Colorado
Posts: 109
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10-21-2009, 03:11 PM
| #7 (permalink) | |
| Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 209
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10-21-2009, 05:36 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| peaceful seabird Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: floating
Posts: 1,539
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Some of the wisdom I learned from this forum was about offering advise: Say it once and I am offering helpful advise Say it twice and I am trying to control another person Glad you saw the humor in pulling out the calendar! We need to laugh at ourselves.
__________________ "How does one become a butterfly?" she asked pensively. "You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar." Trina Paulus Hope for the Flowers |
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