And now for something copletely different
 

snippet from

Alcoholism - Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia


Practitioners of Alcoholism, or "Alcoholics", can be easily identified by the following characteristics:

* Incomprehensible speech (from achieving divine intelligence)
* Uncoordinated movement (from having shed most ties to the earthly realm)
* Dirty, unkempt appearance (to cover their otherwise blinding sexiness)
* Brown paper bags (to minimize their contact with glass, the antithesis of aluminium)
* Jaundice