Recovering Alcoholic Question

[KarenMarie1]

My boyfriend has been sober for 4 years. We have been dating for about a year and it has been a bit of a roller coaster ride at times. He has started eating healthy and exercising. I think this is GREAT, but I am a little concerned that he is almost obsessed with it. He is weight training, bike riding and started running. He is on a strict high protein diet. He spends about 4 hours a day doing his regimen.
While I am VERY glad he is working on his long neglected health, I was wondering if this was a little on the obsessive side. I am not complaining, just wondering if other recovering alcoholics experience a total focus on one activity that takes up most of their spare time?
Thanks!

[baggervance]

LMAO
yeah that is what we do all or nothing be it drinking working playing that come along with most of us.

[GlassPrisoner]

My guess is he has no program except for the exercise regimen.

ALMOST obsessed ? BV is right, we are all or nothing people.

Before I found AA, I did the exact same thing. I raced mountain bikes, and I got very, very good at it. I competed at the Expert level here in So Cal, which is just as competitive as Pro anywhere else.

I rode 2.5 hours a day, and I ate, slept, pooped walked & talked cycling. My (now ex) wife became irritated, but I always told her "it's better than drinking !".

One day, I got tired. Tired of training. Tired of riding the same course 15 times a week to shave 5 seconds off of my 2.5 hour ride. I decided I'd stop and have just a little drink on the way home. You know the rest......it took me 10 years to find my sobriety again. And this time it was bad.

By the Grace of God, I discovered AA. I no longer obsess over things.......ummm....as much.

[Astro]

Oh man, what Glass said! I've got nothing further to add!

[DesertEyes]

Hi there KarenMarie, and welcome to this wonderful website. I'm glad you found us.

It is very common for recovering alkies to switch obsessions. Most of the time that's all it is, as the other guys here commented. Once in awhile it turns out to be something serious, but there's no way to tell over the web. It takes a doctor with experience in addiction to find out.

The lady I am currently dating has such a disorder. It's a medical condition popularly known as an "Eating Disorder". It's a type called "Compulsive Over-Exercise". I don't know if your boyfriend has any such thing, I'm not a doctor and nobody here is either. You can find out more about this type of Eating Disorder here

http://fishybb.something-fishy.org/

welcome again

Mike

[KarenMarie1]

Thanks so much for the welcome and information! GlassPrisoner, he is active in AA. He seems to have a good sponsor and I am grateful for that.
I have been trying to educate myself as much as possible on alcoholism and recovery. I am thinking about attending Al-Anon to see if it would help.
I look forward to learning what I can through this site. It seems like there are some really decent people here.

[Earthworm]

That sounds about right, all or nothing.


Earthworm

[elizabeth1979]

Hi KarenMarie and welcome!
Yep, sounds like the others who have responded took the words from my mouth..all or nothing!
The good news, is that, you arent just imagining his obsession..its pretty typical!
Glad you are here

[Grasshopper]

Hi and welcome!!!!!

[respektingme]

I gotta be honest. I want to lose 40 lbs. I just wish I had about 20% of his level of obsession/dedication.

Does sound irritating. My AH has been able to stay thin apparently, partly because he didn't have much of an appetite while drinking. Now that he's not drinking, his appetite is back and he's afraid of gaining weight. Wonder if that is what prompted your bf to get into it.

I have a friend who is obsessed with AA. It's all he talks about. Which is better than being an addict for certain. He tells every person he meets that he's an addict and he goes to AA. He dates women he meets there.

I don't know. Would be nice if he had some balance. Would you want to ride with him?

[KarenMarie1]

I have thought about riding with him. I would have to work up to it. I can ride about 4 miles right now without having to call an ambulance! :-) He rides about 15 miles a day. He wants me to go to a weight lifting class with him, but I honestly don't want to go to a class with mostly guys.
He has been fussing at me about eating right and working out. I do eat pretty healthy, but I don't have as much spare time to workout as he does. I walk several times a week. I am a single Mom that works full time and I have a business on the side. So, my plate is kinda full.
I am going to talk to him about riding with him and see what he says about the fact I can't ride the distances he rides.
I just wonder if this is a passing obsession or here to stay?

[Pick-a-name]

Hi, KarenMarie!

Glad you are here and hope you stick around.

My sister (recovering A) seemed to "cycle-thru" an eating disorder and exercise disorder before she found alcohol (now she seems to be switching from a shopping to a cleaning mode,JMHO).

[Loreena]

Yes, indeed this is very true for every alchy I know, my first 5 years in the program I did everything I had missed out for the 15 years I sat on a bar stool, travel, excercise, boating, 1 sometimes 2 meetings a day, I was obsessed with everything. it dies down though, we are very compulsive/obsessive/addictive people, anything that feels good!! Maybe he is getting his high now from the endorphines he releases when excercising, much better high and the benefits are great.

You are right, it is overkill, we cannot do anything in small doses like normal folk!!

if one is good, two is better, three is better still, four is great, maybe five......