Halfway houses

[parentrecovers]

Anyone know where I start to gather info/educate myself about halfway houses? How to find them, what they're like, the cost involved, etc.

I know nothing, and not sure where to look. Google searches are cryptic.

Thanks! K

(Happy FRIDAY...)

[embraced2000]

does your local court system have an alcohol and substance abuse division?

if so, they should be able help you find what you are looking for.

the local mental health centers can also help.
good luck
jeri

[cmc]

Going to some open AA or NA meetings will give you an opportunity to not only learn more about the disease, but to actually get some feedback on some of your local halfway houses, from people who have lived in them.
Another idea is to ask your family doctor or an addiction counselor in your area.

[laurie6781]

Not your job. It's her job to find a half way house, and get the info. Let her do it.

It is her responsibility to find a place to live, not yours.

It's what I had to do for me when I got sober, and it is what every one of the sponsees I have had over the last 25 years have done for themselves also.

Take the time instead that you would spend searching and go to some Al-anon meetings for you.

Keeping you and your daughter in my prayers.

Love and hugs,

[parentrecovers]

I have no intention of finding or supporting the cost of a halfway house for my daughter. I do intend to educate myself as much as I can about them, so I can provide her with the love and support I am able to give her while she is making the transistion, and continuing her path to recovery. I appreciate my Alanon meetings and I am trying very hard to learn and grow in the program. Meanwhile, this is what my family does - we give all we can to each other in hard and trying times, especially when one of us is asking for help and trying to do the best thing. I will know my own limit when that time comes.

That said, I hear you, Laurie - didn't cause it, can't cure it, can't control it.

Thanks! K

[BigSis]

Google the word "oxford house" and your state name. Oxford Houses are not halfway houses, but are sober living arrangements. Both my kids lived in them.... my son for over a year.

I wish you well.

[parentrecovers]

Thanks, BigSis - that was helpful. I did not know there was a dif between halfways and sober living houses. We live in a big city, so the resources are endless and so difficult to sort through. My A's counselors at rehab keep pointing her to ones in their area - which is in another state. Seems kind of silly to my husband and I, since there seem to be options in the geographical area that she thinks she wants to end up in. Makes sense for her to build a network of AAers and job contacts in this area, where she's like to live? We're just trying to advocate a bit over here...K

[mushroom]

Advocating can be enabling. Her counselors may have their reasons for pointing her where they are. Sometimes As need to break off from contact with the old and familiar to recover.

Oxford houses are everywhere and are very selective about who they take in. She'll have to interview with them and they won't take anyone they think is not committed to sobriety and recovery. I'm sure there's other options too but that was the only one my ex AH would look at (and they wouldn't take him).

[denny57]

Originally Posted by parentrecovers

Seems kind of silly to my husband and I, since there seem to be options in the geographical area that she thinks she wants to end up in. Makes sense for her to build a network of AAers and job contacts in this area, where she's like to live?

Makes sense in what way? Won't the area be there when she's ready to end up there? There's a guy in one of my groups - a parents' group - that always talks about how he had to learn to take the steering wheel out of the back of his son's head. I love that analogy.

[parentrecovers]

jez, i'm confused...

[Japic05]

There might be a reason why her counselors are encouraging her to stay at one of the houses close to the rehab. Maybe they feel she needs to stay in that comfort area to build on her sobriety time before she is ready to venture out into her area of origin.

My AH lived at an Oxford house for 7 months before getting an apartment of his own - It really worked well for him.

I can relate - it was easier when it was my AH, it is much harder dealing with my step-daughter - my sponsor keeps reminding me "Let Go & Let God"

Keeping you in my thoughts & prayers,
Rita

[parentrecovers]

Thank you, everyone! Need to hear all this....K