http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/ Mon, 23 Nov 2009 12:31:15 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/ http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/189109-if-i-had-ever-thought.html Mon, 23 Nov 2009 10:41:03 GMT The sobriety calendar tells me that I have now been sober for 647 days, my mother passed awat on the 2nd of Aug.,this year, a day after her 89th birthday after being diagnosed with an aggressive for... The sobriety calendar tells me that I have now been sober for 647 days, my mother passed awat on the 2nd of Aug.,this year, a day after her 89th birthday after being diagnosed with an aggressive for of brain cancer, she was gone within 10 days. Throughout my life, even in my 30 years of drinking I was always a dutiful son and she never saw me drunk although perhaps some might see her as an ,'enabler' as she often helped me financially throughout my troubles when I once again ,'had a bit of bad luck' and was stuck for cash.

Fortunately on the 15th of Feb.,2008 , I'm not that sure of the date so don't hold me to it, I had a ,'spiritual experience', alone and unaided by human hand when I could only crawl to my bed, my alcoholism was taken from me, I didn't even want to stop drinking!

I continued to see my mother, never told her w3hat happened, I was just sober, the financial assistance just tailed off along with the guilt I felt.

If I had ever thought all that time ago that I would not only be sober now, but more importantly at the time of her passing I'd have thought I would never have believed it!

In truth, at the end of the day , for whatever happened and whatever the set backs were, mainly,'slips' I hung on but for me I know it has to be a case of,'those who thoroughly follow our path' nothing less will do, because that's what worked for me in the end.

One final thought, if it worked for me, how mucvh better will it work for you, may the God of your understanding go with you,saleh. Mike W. ]]> Where Were You? 43395 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/189109-if-i-had-ever-thought.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/189017-still-shaking.html Sat, 21 Nov 2009 19:26:24 GMT I found this place out of pure desperation, after spending yet another night completely smashed and digging around for razors.
At the moment, I'm utterly terrified at the life ive lived and what might happen. Happy to have found this website but afraid of f***ing up yet again. ]]> Where Were You? Delirium http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/189017-still-shaking.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188767-masks-have-go.html Wed, 18 Nov 2009 00:27:58 GMT What's up!!
My name is noahamin. I was asked to speak at a recovery "Speaker-thon" on Thanksgiving on the topic "The Masks Have to Go". This is a phrase that is also found in the Narcotics Anonymous basic text. Does anyone have some feedback on this topic?:wtf2 ]]> Where Were You? noahamin http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188767-masks-have-go.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188645-jewel-seas.html Mon, 16 Nov 2009 06:44:20 GMT It was a beatiful weekend and my and wife and I had boarded a cruiseship of Royal Caribbean (Jewel of the seas). It took her over 6 months of convincing to finally get me to agree to have this... It was a beatiful weekend and my and wife and I had boarded a cruiseship of Royal Caribbean (Jewel of the seas). It took her over 6 months of convincing to finally get me to agree to have this wonderful vacation together. Why did she had to do so much convincing? After all, isn't that why I work so hard? So I could have my well deserved vacation? So I could have the honeymoon I couldn't afford when we married? Well, the answer is simple. I hated traveling because my addiction required to me come up with creative ways to sneak drugs and cruiseships where an uncharted territory for me. X-ray machines, customs, tiny staterooms, smoke detectors, cameras, etc. All I could think of was me getting caught in the act by government agents, cruise staff, or worse, by my wife.

After weeks of planning and researching the issues of smuggling and consuming on board, I finally pulled the trigger and purchased the tickets. I got a stateroom with a balcony as suggested by someone who had posted in a drug forum. Armed with a map of the ship, I orchestrated how my drug routine was going to play out. It was a masterplan! Drugs safely raped around tens of layers of latex. Paraphenalia disguised as common items found in any vacationer's luggage. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, it was all planed out.

The first day everything went according to plan. I didn't get caught smuggling them into the ship. Not even after being subject to a "random" search by cruise staff at the port. I was getting hi and I was loving it! My wife was happy and ignorant of what was going on.

Second day went also according to plan. I was getting of on ports with my daily dose and consuming it at land without raising any suspicion from the locals or my wife.

On the third day, something went totally not according to plans. My wife suspected something was going on and I was confronted by her. The unfamiliar territory and insane hi made me crumble. In an act of desperation I confessed my sins to her. As of today, I don't know exactly what happened but I can guess it was my tiredness of years and years of lies and hidding in the shadows. She said that she was not intending to spend the rest of her life next to addict and that unless I got help i could start forgetting about her. The feeling was mutual. I told her I was ready to admit to others my addiction and was ready to get the treatment I need it.

I picked up my blackberry and started doing research. This is how I found this site! I started reading about people with my problem and how this site had helped them control their disease. I was static to say the least. Since that day, this site, along with my treatment at a hospital, has played a major role in my recovery. I will be forever thankful to all those who extended their support. I may not know their names or what they look like but that doesn't stop me from loving them with all my heart. Thank you all for your support!!!! :You_Rock_ ]]> Where Were You? MDB79 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188645-jewel-seas.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188445-a.html Fri, 13 Nov 2009 03:05:01 GMT place reminds me so much of what I have been going through the last twenty years of my life. I honestly see myself in some of these people. I finally quite for about three years ago with some lapses... place reminds me so much of what I have been going through the last twenty years of my life. I honestly see myself in some of these people. I finally quite for about three years ago with some lapses here and there but over all I have been doing quite well. I go to work and then to church twice a week and some may say that I am weak but I would rather be weak than feeling lower than a dog at times with a hang over. Plus, everybody hating you including your own family. There are things that I would say and do that some people can not get over and some of the stuff I could not remember even doing. Then the depression was so overwhelming at times I would feel like doing something stupid. I had a family member do that..suicide so I did not want to take that road out. I remember what it did to me and how it made me feel. I would like to come and stay here because I had a relapse during this halloween and I felt so guilty about it that it brought me to a realization that I cannot do this alone. :c031: ]]> Where Were You? N2breathe http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188445-a.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188338-low-i-have-ever-been.html Wed, 11 Nov 2009 16:43:59 GMT I can't remember being or feeling any lower, shittier or just plain old uselessness than I did last week at this time...

Although I've gone through this all before, I've never physically or mentally felt that way...To be honest suicide seriously crossed my mind for the first time in my life...

I needed a way out...I made an appointment and went to a drug and alchohol addiction center on Monday night...

It turned out to be a group therapy type of thing which to be honest is not for me...I am generally a closed and very private person...Speaking about my problems and issues in front of strangers just isn't something I think I can do...

I was sitting here at my PC yesterday...I decided to see if I could find an open forum and here I am...

I'm hoping that talking with you and hearing and experiencing some of your stories will help drive me in the right direction...

I do believe this is my last chance...I just don't think my wife can take any more and I really can't blame her...

This is my last chance...I need to use it wisely... ]]> Where Were You? AfterForever http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/188338-low-i-have-ever-been.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187213-anvil-experience.html Tue, 27 Oct 2009 05:30:58 GMT Shakaymuni, the Buddha(Ocean of Wisdom) said that before acceptings his teachings,the Four Noble Truths(suffering through to enlightenment) which lead to the Eight Fold Noble Path(how you treat... Shakaymuni, the Buddha(Ocean of Wisdom) said that before acceptings his teachings,the Four Noble Truths(suffering through to enlightenment) which lead to the Eight Fold Noble Path(how you treat others and yourself) you should hammer them out on the anvil of experience so that you are sure of them. Given that these reflect the Twelve Steps, which the Buddhists when shown them,(see,'As Bill Sees It') only wishing to substitute the word,'good' for,'God' although it had not been explained to them that it meant,'the God of my understanding', there is little doubt in my mind that adherence to and PRACTICE of all these principles,'in all my affairs' lead to my having a,'Spiritual experience' on the 15th,Feb.,2008 so that I have now been sober 620 days!For me it worked, particularly a thorough understanding and practicfe of the information provided in the first 164 pages of the book,'Alcoholics Anonymous' followed by my enlarging my spiritual knowledge and practising these principles in all my affairs, so I am a grateful, recovering alcoholic.Michael.:c031: ]]> Where Were You? 43395 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187213-anvil-experience.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187140-thinking-about.html Mon, 26 Oct 2009 06:56:08 GMT Thinking about it, now I have apparently been sober 619 days I am, as it says in the,'Big Book' a,'real alcoholic, a term much dis paraged at A.A. meetings in the North West of England, apparently it's felt to be to,'American' which in truth is a load of rubbish! So why am I a ,'real alcoholic' ? Whilst some people may become heavy drinkers or even alcohol dependent I'm a real alcoholic because when I take alcohol it instantly makes everything alright! Bang! It instantly fills the hole inside me and erases all doubts, fears, feelings of inadequacy, whatever. No matter that my mind and body are different than a,'normal social' drinker, which is bad enough in itself, the effect on me is of such euphoria, I can be ME!!!! Of course I'm not me, in my sobriety I'm only just begining to learn to be me, despite my three careers, two stints at University, one whilst I was still drinking in my 55th year, the 2nd one was done to see if I could still produce extended writing. Without doubt then my biggest success is my sobriety and my daily efforts to pursue it by making spiritual progress.:c031: ]]> Where Were You? 43395 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187140-thinking-about.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187067-important-remember.html Sun, 25 Oct 2009 06:21:08 GMT As a recovering alcoholic it is important for me to remember that I am powerless over people, places and institutions, their actions and behaviour, whether they drink or not is not my problem. The 12... As a recovering alcoholic it is important for me to remember that I am powerless over people, places and institutions, their actions and behaviour, whether they drink or not is not my problem. The 12 steps are by definition a selfish programme relating to my recovery, I like the idea that was once put to me, that after Bill.W. had been sober for a lengthy period and spent his time talking to plenty of drunks in an effort to get them sober and failed in his attempts to do so he complained of this fact to his wife,Lois.

It was she then who pointed out that in following this course of action, Bill Wilson had himself maintained his sobriety. Perhaps then, it was Lois Wilson who founded AA?:c031: ]]> Where Were You? 43395 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/where-were-you/187067-important-remember.html