New, frightened, and unsure...

[AlisonJoy]

I've debated as to whether I wanted to post here. Despite all the knowledge I hold, I remain new, frightened, and unsure...

I have been battling anorexia and bulimia for nearly eleven years, now. I am twenty-two years old. During this time, I have entered numerous treatment programs and modalities, with the only glimmer of recovery coming from Overeaters Anonymous. Although I have been part of OA for a little over two years, I will be celebrating one year of abstinence at the end of this month. That means that I have gone nearly a year without purging after meals. Despite this fact, I still struggle with consuming appropriate quanities of food and over-exercising, although I am beginning to find truth in the montage: Progress, not perfection.

I also struggle with alcohol and some addiction to other substances, though my, "drug of choice," has always been food and eating behaviors. I suppose I am attempting to seek supplemental support for my ongoing recovery.

I look forward to meeting everyone and sharing my experience, strength, and hope. And I am grateful that such support exists and flourishes...for I know, without it, I would not be here right now...

Thank-You;
-- Ally --

[star911960]

Hi Ally,

I'm new to this forum also. I've just gone back to OA after being away 15 years. I just wanted to let you know that I wish you the best.

Lori

[Pony]

Welcome to you also Ally.

Although I don't struggle with exactly the same issues, I do have the compulsive addictive behaviors. I eat from emotions and also struggle with alcohol. Although I had been sober for 9 yrs.....had one slip and now 9 mos. sober again....I have struggled with weight and food all of my life. It is a life long behavioral change. A restructural change of habits and thinking that we acquired somewhere along the way. With substances we can learn to live without them (through recovery), but with food we have to learn to live with it.....because we need it to live.

I too, for many years went back and forth between drinking, not drinking....losing weight while drinking, gaining it when not. Exchanging one addiction for another is quite common, but now we can recognize it and deal with both.

[KelKel]

Welcome Ally
I think you will feel right at home here.
Looking forward to getting to know you better.My name is Kellie, I am an alcoholic. When I was in my late teens, I had a nasty bout with bulemia, so I do understand some of what you are going through...

[Paulie]

Welcome from me too Ally.

this is a great place for friendship and support and I am glad you found us.

I look forward to getting to know you better. congrats on your year!!!

[Nina Kay]

Welcome Ally,
I'm so glad that you decided to post here. I'm Linda; A food addict & compulsive overeater. I have struggled with this since my early teens, now I'm about to be 50. I have done alot of binging, in my life. And I have considered the throwing up & laxatives after, but was too scared, so I never did. I'm not anorexic, but have in the past, gone several days at a time without eating anything. Only drinking water. I have also done the little stints of time with the over exercising. I've only looked good & felt good about myself after getting to my goal weight, only 2 times in my life, so far & each time only lasted about a year. The first time I did it by exercising all day every day & eating very little. Years later, I did it by eating very little food & gorging every day on popcorn. I've never been able to get all of the extra weight off since then. Every now & then I'll lose a few lbs. but it never lasts very long & I then gain that weight back plus some more. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in your struggle, even if our ways of compulsive overeating are a little different. I think that it is so wonderful that you have been able to be abstinent for a year. Wow !! Glad to hear that you are big on remembering, Progress; not Perfection. I tell myself that everyday & I have to tell myself several times a day that I need to just do this One Day At A Time. It really ends up being One Step At A Time. One Hour At A Time. I was 12 days abstinent, but then slipped for 1 day, but got right back up the next day & started again, thanks to the support here & the online meetings. I am on my 4th day of abstinence, but have lost 5 lbs, in this last month, by doing it the healthy way. Thanks to my God & this forum & the OA Program. I do hope that you'll keep coming back here & we can support one another. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}