is this YOU?????

[everybodyhurts]

~heyy. rachel here. look i just thought i'd put up a quick shout-out for anyone who is going through a similar thing to me and maybe we could support eachother by posting and we can compare stories and hopefully celebrate our progress!!!!!!!!
i'm 21. female. about to make what will hopefully be my new (true) beginning. i dont ever want to binge again- i dont ever want to feel sick from food again. (yeh i want to get fit, get healthy and all that but ill keep this post brief) .

*anyway- if theres anyone making a new beginning or who wants to- please let me know!!!!!

and if i sound positive- well i am but dont think i'm in a great place right now either otherwise i doubt i'd be here!!!!!!!!!!!(see other posts) just got here today.

cheers.

[Pony]

Hi,

Just wanted to welcome you Rachel to this forum. I did go and read some of your other posts. I think you are very articulate and shared very nicely. The writen word is always so much harder, in my opinion, to convey every feeling you have, but I could get a sense of how you are feeling and where you are at with things.

It good that you have set your "get going date" we could call it. It's a start and better than saying .... "someday I'll do it" ....no, instead you said now, I am going to do it.

I am a compulsive overeater.....eating from emotions and stress. I for the most part have it under control....have been doing pretty good with it. But nothing is perfect..lol...I do have some days that get away from me. The thing is that I can recognize what I am doing and stop myself.....sometimes before I eat out of compulsion and sometimes I have already taken that first bite, but stop before I totally lose it.

For me I have devise a plan of healthy choices of food and exercise. My food ends up varying due to my work schedule.....like sometimes it ends up a sandwhich instead of the meal I intended on cooking, but it is all chosen from foods I buy that are healthy. I try very hard to stay away from fast food hambergers. I will choose a grilled chicken instead.....these are just my examples for me. My point is that whether bulmic or anorexic, or just a compulsive overeater, we all need to gear ourselves to living and eating healthier. Healthy food plan and exercise regulary (even if it's just a walk) is really where it's at, and when it's just a part of your life and not the whole thing....you free yourself to live it doing other things you enjoy. Learning to accept yourself and be content for who you are is also a big part of this also. When we are not so consumed by what we think others think of us or trying to be that "super model" type, we are living life and enjoying it carefree....doing whatever it is we want to and going wherever it is we feel like, without the embarressment or fear.

I am glad you are here to join us. We are all here for support so please feel free to share your progress with us.

[octoberbabye]

My point is that whether bulmic or anorexic, or just a compulsive overeater, we all need to gear ourselves to living and eating healthier.

Hi Rachel,
I liked that you used the term 'new beginning'. I really try not to think or say starting over or starting again. To me that brings up a lot of doing the same things over again, and while some of these things may be good, a new beginning suggests adding to what we already know works.
My new beginnings always include looking at the first three steps. Surrender, start responding to God, and enlarging my spiritual life. This is what the first three steps represent to me. And concentrating on these always gives me a knowing that it is possible to stop suffering from the disease.
Please post often.

[everybodyhurts]

Hey guys. well the last couple of days have..not gone to plan.

i do feel quite embarassed that i came on here saturday night and said -"hey everyone!!! sunday is my new beginning "

so i guess what can be taken from this example= i was acting as though i had the addiction beaten-but it was only beaten in my mind, and actually you have to beat it again and again, you have to beat it every moment every day- because it is the way you live that beats it; not your virtual willingness to beat it.

ie. you actually have to LIVE differently to the way you did before no matter how good your intentions are.

geeze- i hadnt done enough planning because life doesnt run smoothly, and the moment I get bored or depressed....that sorta thing must NOT alter the sobriety. i have to discover a way of living that exists ABOVE adrenalin and positivity. ye know like i can go for 4 days or more- pumping it at the gym and working my arse off and i can look fabulous because i know i've got a hot date - which happened last week. but then come the day after, when i'm feeling like **** and i'm feeling alone....i look for the comfort i didnt get the night before- i get it from food. and suddenly i'm not sucha hot chic

thanx for your support and i will be back on here but now i'm going to go away and consolidate how i'm going to live DIFFERENTLY from now on. (before i claim to have won this thing- the proof will be in my actions- every moment, every day).

catcha later.

[octoberbabye]

Hey sweetie, Are you in a 12 step program? I get a sense from your post that you are trying to do this in isolation. There's a great value in going to meetings. Some days you remember something you heard and it gets you through.
Also, are you reading? Let me know, I have some books I can pass on to you if you want.

[dubloosh]

yes one has to live differently and make new friends and remember this is one day at a time . . . and sudenly those odats add up - for me it's been more than 17 years since my last binge/purge; i came to OA bankrupt physically, emotionally and spiriutally and know this program works!

as they told me and still tell me, keep coming back, and don't quit 5 minutes before your miracle (and put hard-to-turn-over issues into your God box too)

[tobstah]

*sigh* wow.. 17 years? hey thank you, you just gave me some hope!