I have been awol

[antreeta]

I have been not reading these boards for a while and not attending my OA for several months now and I am binging on and off, but I have lost around 10 pounds. Go figure.
I am tired of trying to work the program and worrying about what I eat. I want what my I want. My inner child is so selfish. Throws tantrums.
But anyway, I still been going to Al Anon, seeing a counselor. My family doctor thinks I might be bipolar, I think he is wrong. I am going to get a second opinion.
I try the low carb diet and I get so depressed, like my life is over and I can eat any piece of high carb food, healthy or not and the birds start singing, the sun shines and the flowers bloom. That is exactly how it feels when I take my first bite of bread, fruit, milk or candy. But my physical body does very well on low carb, plus I am diabetic and it really keeps my blood sugar under control without the high spikes, but the depression is sooooooo hopeless. I don't even want to eat.
Food turns nasty and I feel like I am being forced to eat like a little child having to eat brussel sprouts or something.
But on the other hand, I have been living with chaos all around me. My 17 yo son was depressed and he was cutting on himself. Talk about being in shock. At the same time, my husband was having panic attacks and couldn't hardly leave the house and was missing work and scared to drive. They are both doing better now.
I feel so anxious and nervous and right now, food helps that go away. I am on meds but the food seems to work best. I am really an addict to food. How much is hormones, mental, or chemical imbalance. I just turned 40.
Who knows?
To top it off, this is so ironic, I just had a slim fast binge. LOL
I am a mess and I really need to let my higher power work on my food and family so I can relax.
Thanks for listening.

[Ann]

Welcome back.

The low carb diet has worked really well for me and even though I allow myself special treats once in a while or a day to eat what I want occasionally, I have managed to lose and keep off 30 pounds since I started in January. For me, that puts me at a really good weight and I am wanting to lose about 5 more just to give me room for a little fluctuation.

The thing that helped me a lot, when craving sweets is the Atkins Advantage Bars. There are several different types and they are even better than a chocolate bar and only have about 3 grams carb. Also there are now low carb breads that are great, low carb bagels that I love with cream cheese, and low carb peanut butter (Skippy brand), BBQ sauce, and lots of products that taste as good as the original.

I don't know how low you are aiming for, but for me I strive for about 40 grams a day and no more than 60, except the treat days.

My husband is also using this diet to lose 50 pounds and is within about 10 pounds of his goal. He too is diabetic and finds that this diet (or eating plan) is perfect to keep his insulin levels where they should be.

My point is that you need not feel deprived of the things you love. And losing very slowly is still losing and probably healthier and more likely to keep the pounds off than losing quickly.

I can't help you much with your family problems, but I will say a prayer for all of you.

Hugs
Ann

[antreeta]

It is the hopeless I feel when I do this diet, the world looks without color and I have no cravings. It might be a withdrawal thing. I have allowed myself the special low carb treats and it still doesn't seem to help.
I need balance. I think it must be sugar withdrawal, It always hits about a week after I start watching carbs.
Oh well, progress not perfection.
Thanks again.

[Pony]

Antreeta.....Hey, it's nice to hear from you again. Just take it one day at a time ...it will grow to be a natural process once you get passed the retraining yourself and your body to your new program.

IMO we should always have balance in our lives......food, excerise, love, family, friends. It just takes being aware of ourselves and our needs/desires......and our limitations. Please keep coming back.

[splendra]

Antreeta-

I feel for your family troubles it sounds like you are doing all you can. Do be gentle with yourself. You are changing your diet and that can stir things up a bit. Don't forget the fiber that helps keep you intestines clear and will help the sluggisness. The low carb diet helps a lot of people get on track I hope you will be one of them.

[antreeta]

You guys are so nice. Thanks.