sober but my eating disorder is out of control

[splendra]

eat olive oil and sesame oils they are very good for you and they have the kind of fat the body needs and they wont make you fat. Your brain must have fat. Please help your brain stay healthy. I always add oil to my pastas and even oat meal. Eating these oils will never ever make you fat especially if you avoid meat and dairy fats.

I love the smell of sesame oil I love to use it after bathing as well as eat it! I also put olive oil on my skin. There are cultures that consider the oil of sesame to be sacred and of high value.

I love for my sense of smell to be fully exercised while eating the smell is over half the enjoyment for me which is why I love spices and herbs so much. This way I can smell more and eat less.

Did you know that even rats won't eat refined sugar or artificial sugars? Even they know it is poison.

[mxchaos]

Thanks I'll give it a try
I love spices some are so calming.

[mxchaos]

New week new goals
working on healthy even though my feelings tell me different.

[mxchaos]

I haven't quit being sober so I won't quit trying to be healthy
just for today

[splendra]

Originally Posted by mxchaos

I haven't quit being sober so I won't quit trying to be healthy
just for today

Now That's what I would be talking about if'n I was a talking...

[mxchaos]

I don't feel like healthy is in the cards today but I must give it a try. If I can be sober than I should beable to be healthy

[mxchaos]

I wish I wasn't so full of anxiety I want to do healthy things but anxiety stops me. My tdoc and I have been working on this and hopefully I'll soon be working out at the local Dojo kicking some ass.

I'm also working on eating as my tdoc says it's important to eat and sleep well. Helping to cut down on anxiety.
Fighting to be healthy is hard work.

[roxiestone]

mxchaos, I hope you are feeling better today. I understand what you mean about anxiety. It can be debilitating.

Peace for you today.

[mxchaos]

new day so I'll try again
spent some quality time with my girl and gearing up for a blizzard. My mood seems better and it's swimming day and pizza night. so that means spending time with both my kids and starting my day off doing something I love.
working on healthy

[splendra]

I don't know if you got any Blue Green Algae yet or not but I think it really helped me with the anxiety.

Also Bach Rescue Remedy (flower essence) is very good the original formula has alcohol but they now have an alcohol free formula and it is very gentle.

I am very glad for you that you get to spend time with your babes today.

[mxchaos]

thanks for reminding me of the blue green algea I'll have to look for it and try it.
I was a little sad because pizza night was postponed till tonight. I made through and I'm still working on maintaining my weight and working on healthy.

thanks for all the support

[mxchaos]

feels like a rough day ahead mood is low and it's hard to fight when I feel like this but I'll keep trying

[splendra]

hummm Passion flower tea comes to my mind...

[splendra]

(((mx))))

Really and truly there is not much in the human realm that can help us. Our brains are different we have medicated ourselves and disturbed our brains. We just have to become aware of what we are doing to ourselves. I say we because I too have difficulties and have gotten myself into a tight spot.

I know things look bad, but there is a reason we are still alive. We have purpose. We cannot give up on ourselves and we have to be aware of when we are being pulled back into our disease.

I am so glad that you are reaching out it proves that you want to live. Pray with me ((((mx))))) let's not ever stop praying. I am having a very hard time too. I am out of work, I am in foreclosure with my property and I am really scared. I am too old for this! In my mind I was supposed to be all set by this age.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God loves us both and we can contact Him both separately and together at any time. Just a little prayer can do so much. I know for sure that with God all things are possible. I can feel your pain and I think I might be able to feel you pray too just know I will pray with you and for you.

[mxchaos]

Thank you for all the support and I'm sorry you are so uncertain about your future at a time when you should be all set. I never thought I'd be starting a whole new life at my age either but it's all good. Living on my own discovering new thing, my relationship with my family is much better,I've started practicing wicca again and I have found a wonderful support group here at SR.

Anorexia is the hardest thing I'm working on right now it's been apart of my life for 30something years and with lots of help I hope to beat it, not giving up today just struggling with it.

[mxchaos]

I tried really hard today to be healthy and eat but I couldn't

[mxchaos]

It's been a rough few days but I saw my doc yesterday and we are doing a med change to see if it helps. Today I see my tdoc which is good because I could use a kick in the ass and someone that can think outside my box.

still haven't been able to eat but I'm doing other healthy things trying hard to change my thoughts and feelings.

[mxchaos]

Tdoc thinks I'm working really hard to do healthy things in most areas of my life so now we are working on eating. which has been difficult if not impossible for the last couple of days. I can't overcome this fat feeling and the body distortion when looking in the mirror.

happy winter solstice and enjoy the energy from it.

[dave47]

Hope you had a good Christmas mx, best wishes with the daily battle.

[mxchaos]

I had a great Christmas hope you did too. I'm guessing the healthy things I've been doing made a big difference in my moods. Learning that I can choose healthy and that I will someday beat the anorexia it's just going to take more effort.

thanks for all the support

[mxchaos]

not feeling so hopeful today
panic and anxiety over gaining weight
hard to fight my feelings to starve myself

[hopeful2009]

Hey, I just joined like an hour ago and came across your posts! I am so sorry youre going through all of this and hope you find a way to feel better once and for all! I haven't been through what you have, but I have also struggled with weight issues, additions, and even mixed the two.. taking things to be skinny because I couldn't control my weight on my own. It's such a dark road but there is a way out- you just have to want it and keep fighting! Your stronger than you think you are and you can do it. Hang in there!

[mxchaos]

I've been working hard to fight my feelings but they're so strong
won't give up just hard to fight

[Neagrm]

"Never, never, never give up."

[mxchaos]

So I talked with my tdoc and he said my mood is reflecting the lack of food so the goal today is to eat. Eating is a healthy thing to choose and I choose to be healthy as much as I want to starve I want to be a healthy person in mind and spirit.