things I am dealing with....

[Pony]

Hey everyone. I hope your days are all good ones. I know I haven't been posting much. I have been extremely busy with life. My mom, my youngest daughter, and work....and yes, and babysitting my g-daughter.

I wanted to talk about my mom for a bit. She is on the list for the Gastric sleeve surgery. They won't do the Gastric bypass because of her medical conditions. There are some things that they have required of here before they will actually do the surgery. She needs to lose about 5-10% of her currant weight, but not by any type of crash dieting. she has to be on a food program of some sort. Also, they want her more active and exercising. along with attending some support groups and getting some other tests and such done.

anyway, we went to her first support group meeting. I have to go with her because she needs help getting around. Currantly she uses a wheel chair when there is alot of walking involved....she cannot walk long distances or stand for any length of time due to the weight. Well, the dr. wants her out of the chair and not using it by the time of surgery...which is in June. I just don't know if that's a realistic goal....???? If she doesn't get this surgery, if they turn her down...she will never lose the weight. she is bigger then I have ever seen her and just about immoble. She stills works and all, but it's getting more difficult for her to even drive her car to work. It makes me very afraid for her and her future.

This is just the start to this thread. I will be back to write more. I need to go take care of my daughter for now. thanks for reading this far.

[renee18]

Pony, Glad you came here and posted. Just want to encourage you to keep going. I will be praying for you and your mom.

Iam here for you
love
renee

[Pony]

thanks Shana, You are a sweetie.


Alot of this stuff with my mom is some tough issues, because it is also making me face my own food and future if I keep going the direction I am. I have not been so very good at watching my food or my own behaviors surrounding it. Some days I do really well and then others I am so tired that I just don't care and I eat whatever....or I just don't plan ahead and I end up going long periods of time without eating. Of course then I am so hungry I just want everything!!!!

[Pony]

I start each day trying so very hard to focus on "me" and what I need to do with my day and life. somewhere in the midst of the day I stray off into what I need to do and accomplish for others as well. By other's I mean my family. Somedays I just don't feel like I am keeping up.

I want to start working on my training for become a driver trainer at work, now that I am done moving and we are settling in here. Thou, there is still alot of work to do here in the new place before it is ready to call "home". There are some requirements that my boss has put out there for me to accomplish before he will spend the money on the classes and time for me to be trained. So I am trying to focus on those things. My needs is gerring up for this surgery and has many, many needs and demands of my time. (Time off work as well for these things). I explained to my mom, already, that the time I am taking off for her appt's and stuff I don't get paid for. I have already taken alot of time off for when I was moving and had to go to court for my daughter. It hits the pay check really hard.

Anyway, I am just rambling....it is just hard to keep up with these things and my daughter's activities and the babysitting of my g-daughter so my oldest-D can work and make rent also. I feel that food and dealing with it has taken a back seat. But I can't let it happen like that for too long. I will end up in the same place my mother is. That would be bad. I tell myself daily that I need to just get started and do what I need to do, but I fail daily in doing anything productive....except breathing.

[Gambaru]

(((Pony))) It's great to hear from you. Making ourselves and abstinence a priority can be a real challenge at times but I found it has allowed me to be more present for others, and I am worth the time I need. One day at a time.... xx

[pedagogue]

I'm not sure of the feasibility, but maybe you two can do some things together (pro-actively), like meal planning and the like.

[cali]

(((Pony)))
I just saw this thread. I am sorry to say I have been too busy and "on the fly". I just wanted to stop by for a supportive hug. Rememnber to take care of "you" first. I think that it's great that you started a thread where you are sharing what's going on with you.
Hang in there-
Cali

[Pony]

Peda, as always, it's nice to hear from you. Yeah meal planning can be one way of helping things along....but we eat very differently....lol.... and I can't afford to eat the way I should be, so I basically am doing the best I can for this moment. I have been thinking...and brainstorming with my oldest daughter, who also helps to take care of her here, to see what we can come up with aroudn here to help her and us make this tme a bit easier. As far as some of the other things...like the exercise that she needs to do, that has bene very hard to schedule since our schedules differ and can't set down anything firm. She likes things firm and constant where I have a flexible life which revolves around my youngest daughter and my work. All of this is a work in progress....and all suggestions are more than welcome...I listen to them all and try to incorporate what I can.

Cali, thanks for stoppping by..... how are you doing ? Earlier this week I found out that one of my closest friends lost his son last friday to a heart attack. He was around my age....very scarey. Anyway, I have only been able to talk to him by phone, as he is busy with taking care of business, but will see him and his wife tomorrow at the funeral. They, he, was there for me when I lost my dad...helping me through lots of things, this is my opportunity to give back.