Up and down - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

renee18 · 10-15-2007, 07:16 PM

Can anyone relate to this. For awhile now I have been doing good about not bing eating. Especial with a lot of sugar. I used to say it was my depression but I have been really depressed and not binging until today but tonight I did binge. How can I or we go so long and do so good then just start the cycle all over again.

Sometimes I feel like a failure. I was doing so well. Since the semester started I have gained about 7 pounds. I weigh 190. I have been 200 pounds before and it is scary to think I might get back there again.

roxiestone · 10-16-2007, 08:45 AM

One slip does not a failure make. It was a mistake, it doesn't have to be the start of another cycle. Treat yourself gently.

BigSis · 10-16-2007, 12:21 PM

What I've done that helps is to keep reading the literature. For me, that includes the OA books. There is one book in particular that I find helpful - "Abstinence". It talks about all the different ways folks in OA have been "abstinent" from our drug of choice - food.

For me, I am abstinent from sugar... since March. But as I got further into my abstinence, I began to feel pressure... to be "perfect".

Uh-oh. Perfectionism is one of the character defects that drives my OTHER program in Alanon.

But in reading "Abstinence", I discovered that an "imperfect" abstinence CAN be ok! So today, I allow myself whipped topping on my sugar-free frapaccino a couple times a week.

It does not seem to trigger my compulsive overeating, and I do set some limits on it... just a few times a week.

Because my abstinence needs to be from the COMPULSION, and eating "like a normie" also means not thinking constantly about what I am and am not eating... not sitting around thinking about what I just ate.... and not sitting around thinking about the next thing I will eat.

So far, this is working for me.

Prayers going up that you can find a path that works for you... (((hugs)))

Paulie · 10-16-2007, 05:47 PM

Quote:

Because my abstinence needs to be from the COMPULSION, and eating "like a normie" also means not thinking constantly about what I am and am not eating... not sitting around thinking about what I just ate.... and not sitting around thinking about the next thing I will eat.

Thank you for those words.

renee18 · 10-17-2007, 08:18 PM

Thanks everyone. Sorry it took me so long to get back here. Things have been so crazy for me. I am back to not eating dinner and I know it is only one meal but that is just how it start. I need to take care of myself but I am finding it so hard right now.

I need some encouragement

roxiestone · 10-18-2007, 07:58 AM

Renee18 - I wish I knew the perfect words, but I don't. You can do this - you've had many successes in the past. Make it as easy as possible on yourself to make good decisions and treat yourself well.

For me, what helps if I'm struggling to get back on track is not to concentrate on how much I'm eating or depriving myself, but just making sure that I am eating good, wholesome nutrious food.

Hugs and peace to you.

renee18 · 10-20-2007, 09:23 AM

Thanks. I am doing a little better today. With the stress in my life it is driving me crazy. BUt things are looking much better.

Thanks for the support

**Pony** · 10-21-2007, 01:46 PM

{{{{Shana}}}}

Sorry I haven't responded sweety, but I have been following your post. No words of wisdom, just hugs

renee18 · 10-21-2007, 07:04 PM

Thanks Pony. I am somewhere inbetween binging and not eating. The mind that plays so many tricks on me. I am hanging in there. I hope you are too.

HUgs to you Pony

10-15-2007, 07:16 PM	#1 (permalink)
renee18 Awaiting Email Confirmation Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Massillon, Ohio Posts: 387	Up and down Can anyone relate to this. For awhile now I have been doing good about not bing eating. Especial with a lot of sugar. I used to say it was my depression but I have been really depressed and not binging until today but tonight I did binge. How can I or we go so long and do so good then just start the cycle all over again. Sometimes I feel like a failure. I was doing so well. Since the semester started I have gained about 7 pounds. I weigh 190. I have been 200 pounds before and it is scary to think I might get back there again. __________________ Count the night by stars, not shadows. Count your life by smiles, not tears.-unknown- I will not fear what the future may held or be held captive to my past

10-16-2007, 12:21 PM	#3 (permalink)
BigSis On a tear Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Volcano Country! Posts: 3,240	What I've done that helps is to keep reading the literature. For me, that includes the OA books. There is one book in particular that I find helpful - "Abstinence". It talks about all the different ways folks in OA have been "abstinent" from our drug of choice - food. For me, I am abstinent from sugar... since March. But as I got further into my abstinence, I began to feel pressure... to be "perfect". Uh-oh. Perfectionism is one of the character defects that drives my OTHER program in Alanon. But in reading "Abstinence", I discovered that an "imperfect" abstinence CAN be ok! So today, I allow myself whipped topping on my sugar-free frapaccino a couple times a week. It does not seem to trigger my compulsive overeating, and I do set some limits on it... just a few times a week. Because my abstinence needs to be from the COMPULSION, and eating "like a normie" also means not thinking constantly about what I am and am not eating... not sitting around thinking about what I just ate.... and not sitting around thinking about the next thing I will eat. So far, this is working for me. Prayers going up that you can find a path that works for you... (((hugs))) __________________ No matter how spoiled the past may be, our future is spotless.... BigSis

10-17-2007, 08:18 PM	#5 (permalink)
renee18 Awaiting Email Confirmation Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Massillon, Ohio Posts: 387	Thanks everyone. Sorry it took me so long to get back here. Things have been so crazy for me. I am back to not eating dinner and I know it is only one meal but that is just how it start. I need to take care of myself but I am finding it so hard right now. I need some encouragement __________________ Count the night by stars, not shadows. Count your life by smiles, not tears.-unknown- I will not fear what the future may held or be held captive to my past

10-20-2007, 09:23 AM	#7 (permalink)
renee18 Awaiting Email Confirmation Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Massillon, Ohio Posts: 387	Thanks. I am doing a little better today. With the stress in my life it is driving me crazy. BUt things are looking much better. Thanks for the support __________________ Count the night by stars, not shadows. Count your life by smiles, not tears.-unknown- I will not fear what the future may held or be held captive to my past

10-21-2007, 01:46 PM	#8 (permalink)
Pony Forum Leader Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: trail of discovery Posts: 2,514	{{{{Shana}}}} Sorry I haven't responded sweety, but I have been following your post. No words of wisdom, just hugs __________________ "Failure is an EVENT, it is not a person – yesterday really did end last night, and today is your brand new day..." .........unknown The sun always rises, and a new day begins.

10-16-2007, 08:45 AM	#2 (permalink)
roxiestone Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 626	One slip does not a failure make. It was a mistake, it doesn't have to be the start of another cycle. Treat yourself gently.

10-18-2007, 07:58 AM	#6 (permalink)
roxiestone Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 626	Renee18 - I wish I knew the perfect words, but I don't. You can do this - you've had many successes in the past. Make it as easy as possible on yourself to make good decisions and treat yourself well. For me, what helps if I'm struggling to get back on track is not to concentrate on how much I'm eating or depriving myself, but just making sure that I am eating good, wholesome nutrious food. Hugs and peace to you.

10-21-2007, 07:04 PM	#9 (permalink)
renee18 Awaiting Email Confirmation Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Massillon, Ohio Posts: 387	Thanks Pony. I am somewhere inbetween binging and not eating. The mind that plays so many tricks on me. I am hanging in there. I hope you are too. HUgs to you Pony __________________ Count the night by stars, not shadows. Count your life by smiles, not tears.-unknown- I will not fear what the future may held or be held captive to my past

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