Still struggling....

[Pony]

Just reporting in for those that wonder.....lol


I am still struggling with stress and stress eating. I know, an everyday occurance. I start out really good, but somewhere along the day I just seem to bail. I feel tired and disappointed in myself. I have every good intension on doing what I need to for the day, but fall short of follow through.

Portion control and choices have been very erratic. Nothing I am doing right now stays consistant.

I know what I need to do and I know that unless I take action, it ain't gonna happen. I have been lead astray too easily this past week allowing myself to justify every wrong bite. Looking for the quick and easy solutions.... there are none. Not really. None that are lasting and lifestyle changing. Just temp. fixes that I know won't last and that I can't stick to anyway...so that would set me up for failure, which I already feel like. So we won't go there.

Anyway, that's a quick update for those that have been wondering why it seems that I have been a little quiet. Nothing really postivie to tell, so .....

[roxiestone]

Pony,

What has helped you refocus in the past?

[Paulie]

allowing myself to justify every wrong bite

WOW Pony, you have NO idea how much that one sentence that you shared has just helped me.

I have been right there with you doing the same thing. I have gained 12 pounds in the past 6 months, after losing 85 that has really screwed with not just my head but my spirit. But I have justified my way to being 12 pounds heavier. I have justified it by saying "I am an addict and this is just how my disease is manifesting itself right now". WOW what a bunch of BS!!!

Thank you so much Pony for sharing, I send you positive thoughts my friend. And remember what my dear friend always says "the sun always rises and a new day begins".
Love to you!!!!!

[cali]

thank you for always sharing honestly about where you are at. You have helped me so much over the past 6 months of coming back here to this forum.
I could really lose my mind if I let myself spiril down with beating myself up...
I was doing so well-and now it's beat!

*however the strange thing is that I have totally kicked it into high gear wiht my face to face recovery---I am reaching out more---sharing more--going on a retreat in 2 weeks--
maybe right now I can't "have it all"....I mean maybe one thing has got to give in order to grow in other areas....I was totally convinced that if I ate sugar (ok totally abused it) that I would not grow.....I am yet again wrong!

thanks for always sharing truthfully---it gives me so much hope and reassurance that I am NOT alone!!!!!
((((((Pony))))))

[Pony]

Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to this thread. Thanks for the support Paulie and Cali.

I have been spiralling out of control with my food and other addictive bahaviors, although I am still sober, I have been isolating instead of reaching out.

I am glad that you have been reaching out Cali, and getting out there. Good for you. I guess I need more growth in that area cause I still have trouble with that. I tend to feel that I need to keep my problems to myself and not let them out, yet I have no trouble with others sharing theirs with me and lending support to them. But when I am not even following my own words....... what does that say about me.

Anyway, I am here stumbing through ... that's about all I can say for now.

[pedagogue]

Originally Posted by Pony

Anyway, I am here stumbing through ... that's about all I can say for now.

As long as you keep stumbling FORWARD, it'll work out. Recovery is often 3 steps forward and 2 steps back.....a net of +1. You'd be surprised how far you can go if you keep adding together all of those +1's.

Best of luck Pony.

-p

[renee18]

Pony just keep on moving. Things will get better. One day at a time or how I do it one hour at a time.

hugs good friend

[Paulie]

Originally Posted by pedagogue

As long as you keep stumbling FORWARD, it'll work out. Recovery is often 3 steps forward and 2 steps back.....a net of +1. You'd be surprised how far you can go if you keep adding together all of those +1's.

Best of luck Pony.

-p

Great words!!

(((Pony)))