3 fold illness

[Biscuits]

Hi all

haven't been posting much lately but i have been around reading stuff and it all makes interesting reading.

Just wanted to share that i am addicted to food in all forms and shapes and that if i only treat the physical like i did so many times before finding recovery then all i am doing is delaying the enevitable - the day when i will compulsively overaeat again.

I have a 3 fold illness that takes more than a diet to sort out, my compulsive overeating was only a sympton of my desease. Yes i have a pysical craving for certain types of food but the main reason i ate excess food or restricted what i ate was due to that fact that i could not react sanely to life situations. I was born without the rules to life, i went through mine and other peoples lives like a tornado, tearing down everything in my path. Food was my God and i worshiped it, it comforted me when i needed a shoulder to cry on and gave me courage when i needed to attack others who i felt hurt me. Never did i think it would hurt me but it did, it destroyed me and took me to suicidal depths.

For me the twelve steps are the only way i can live sanely today , they are my blue print for life. As long as i continue to work these simple steps in my life each day then i can and will stay away from the destructive power of the food.

I have to remember always that i need recovery on all three levels, not just the physical - a thin body never fixed what was wrong with me emotionally and spiritually. Only by being willing to work this program with others have i been able to live a normal existance, a happy existance and one that today is full, i am no longer searching for what was missing in my life.

I felt compelled to write this today, i am not on a soap box just sharing my E.S.H. - for me the connection with my higher power gives me the ability to keep focusing on my stuff and not others and just for today i am in recovery. All of this has taken time, support, care and love and this has been shown me in so many forms but none more than that of other members of O.A and others who share my desease.

Love and hugs

[Nina Kay]

Hi Biscuits,
I have noticed your not being around much lately. I'm glad that you came here today to share your personal experiences with us. I can tell by reading your posts that you do work your recovery program faithfully and I do know that that's key to recovery. Thanks for reminding us of that. It works if you work it and that's so true. I do also hear in your words that it takes a daily recommitment to continue to keep your recovery. Again, thanks for sharing. Keep coming back, k?!

[BigSis]

I appreciate all the ESH I can get!

Thank you!