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I am recovering from anorexia. I have NEVER wanted to lose weight or thought I was fat. I just didnt eat. At its worse, at 15 years of age I starved myself as a way to deal with emotional pain (yet I didnt realize that was why I was doing it.) My body only allowed me to get so thin. I was never as bony as pictures you see, yet Id go days and days without eating. My menstration ceased. When I began to try to eat it made me sick, so I stopped. Unknowingly 16 years later I still ahve problems, when Im upset Im not hungry, I dont eat. I have to force myself. I do not feel hunger like the average person, I just dismiss the feeling. The less I eat, the less hungry I am. A year ago I went to a doctor for anxiety, after keeping a food journal we discovered, I ate way less than the average adult (I kept looking at the journal, saying No I dont, but the doctor sent me to an eating disorder specialist. As I said earlier I was never overly under weight. I maintained an acceptable yet thin look, I could not gain weight either. Now with eating a strict protein diet Ive gained a healthy amount of weight and am average for my body frame. Prior to gaining weight and eating 6 small protein meals a day I was always lightheaded , dizzy, would suddenly become fatigued, ached and have severe headaches, most of which are gone.
While text book anorexia is what is described on that link, according to the specialists Ive seen anorexia is the ceasation of normal eating patterns, and like addiction it progresses. Many young woman develop anorexia, not for appearance reasons but as simply a way to cope with emotional or mental pain, as eating, or not eating is one thing in their life they feel like they can control
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11-14-2006, 08:47 PM
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