I'm new here

[zoebeck]

Hello
I just joined this website. I had gastric bypass surgery three years ago. Alcohol had never been any kind of an issue in my life before the surgery. Occassionally, at a social event I might have a drink or wine, but never very often and never to excess. Of course, my addiction on choice had always been food, and still is to some extent, because it still has an important place in my life. Fortunately, the surgery has assisted me in limiting my quanities, and with the help of my common sense, I make better choices. Am I cured? Never ever.

What did shock me was that about a year or two after the surgery I discovered alcohol and how I seemed to be very fond of it, in a way I never had before. For some months I would buy wine and drink maybe three glasses every night. I would look forward to it all day, and could almost physically taste it thinking about it at work. That was very strange to me, because it was so alien to my past. I started going to counseling soon after the drinking started because I knew I had a problem. What really smacked me into reality, were my children. Apparently when I drank, it changed my personality, and my adult children were none to pleased with me. They are a very important part of my life, and there was no way I wanted to jeopordize my relationship with them. This all occurred last Christmas. The other thing is, I had gained about 20 pounds, and was not at all happy with myself. I continued the counseling, and made up my mind in January that I would HAVE to stop drinking, and I did, so far. . It's so hard, and reminds me of giving up smoking cigarettes, which I did about five or six years ago. I still miss it sometimes and long for it, as I do the alcohol. But I do feel satisfaction in making good choices; when I do that it gives me a sense of control over myself and my life.
I just joined, and am very interested in hearing about other individuals that had the surgery and how they have been coping with what is still the same person with the same needs and addictions.
Thank you ... this is the first time I have joined a forum of any type..
I look forward to any and all comments.

[Nina Kay]

Hi zoebeck,
I'm so glad that you could join us here. I want to Welcome you to the Eating Disorders Forum of SR and tell you that there is also a smoking forum & drinking forum of SR, as well. I hope that you will keep coming back to this forum as often as possible, while also making yourself at home here at the Sober Recovery Board in many of the forums. We all tend to share with each other all over the SR Board.
I personally, don't have any experience with Gastric Bypass, but I'm sure that there will be some to come along and share with you. Even if they don't, we all have many things in common that we can share as far as our eating disorders go. Thank you so much for sharing your experience, strength & hope with us. Please do keep coming back here and again, Welcome.

[BigSis]

Wow.

THIS is why my Alanon sponsor is so worried about me.

I told her I was looking into gastric lap-band surgery... and she was very upset (in that recovery-I'm-not-going-to-tell-you-how-to-live-your-life-but-baby-this-scares-the-hell-outta-me way).

The reading I've done refers to alcholism as a "side-effect" of the surgery... side effect? Like ringing ears or a weak bladder? Egad! Does the medical community understand what alcoholism IS?

I am an alcoholic, but have not drank since 1983. I suppose alcohol would not be an issue for me, because I just don't do it. But what about the rest of the "ism"? I found I really, really, REALLY like those percoset the doc gave me for a knee surgery earlier this year.... would I tend to abuse THOSE after surgery? What about shopping? Gambling? Over exercising? Over working? My obsessions over my kids?...

... would all of those other parts of the "ism" that I've struggled with suddenly get out of my control?

My sponsor has a real right to be scared for me. Especially with the prescription pills..... just this week, I was doing like someone posted above - visuallizing how nice it would be to just pop a quick pill and ease some of my incredible anger and stress I was feeling (the source of which I was unable to identify). Thank God there were no pills in the house.

But what I DID do was over eat.... . I didn't call my sponsor, or write in my journal or pick up an extra meeting. In the condition I was in this last week, if I did NOT have the ability to overeat... would I pick up a prescription drug? Decide to visit the casino? The thought scares me.

At a women's conference a week or so ago, a bunch of us sat around and decided to start an OA meeting. I am scared to death. Truly. I do NOT want to fail again!

But thinking about this last week is convincing me that the lap-band surgery could have ramifications far beyond weight loss.

My first OA meeting is November 10.

[TheGirlInside]

Zoebeck,

The thoughts that came to my mind when reading your post was that the surgery didn't cure your addictive tendencies. I find it fascinating (in a demented sort of way) how when we think we've got one addiction (like food) licked, along comes that sneaky ******* Addiction to say, "Hey...let's try THIS new thing."

I always have had issues with food, too. There was no such thing as "just one" of ANYTHING, especially anything having to do with sugar. Then, as I got into my teens (and concerned with my appearance), I exercised, ate better, and lost 25 lbs over a summer. And discovered alcohol...man, I was COOL (or so I thought)...and such a badass (yeah, right).

The other thing that popped into my head is that we always say that we "gave up" something, like booze, cigarettes, sugars, whatever. I wish I could be better at opening my arms to receive the multitude of better things beyond the "giving up" something [I really "enjoyed" at one time]...and stay focused on that, especially when the cravings hit. It's like my ability to look to the future has been bound and gagged..."but I've got to have this cookie...right NOW!" (note to self: Take Own Advice)

BigSis, I have just recently considered attending an OA meeting, and lucky me, there is one per week in my new hometown! It just occurred to me that while sitting there at my AA meetings (which I love dearly) and listening to the others talk about their attitudes and antics with alcohol, my first thought is to compare my thoughts and behaviors to food...alcohol comes in a distant second.

Please keep us posted on how the OA meeting goes for you. I think ours are held on Tuesday evenings...I just gotta find a reliable babysitter.

Later,