i am lost - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

renee18 · 10-24-2006, 09:08 PM

I am so lost. The friend I have been talking about throwing up well today went bad. A boy went up to her that she knows and was like so how many fingers do you use when you throw up and when and how do you throw up. I can't believe he said that to her. they are good friend but you do not say things like that to someone who has an eating disorder. I am soooooooo angry. We did not talk to her. I am afraid this is getting out of hand and someone higher up needs to step in. I can't hang in here anymore. I am having my own issues with eating and I love this friend so much and I can't see her in this pain anymore.

Shana

***Nina Kay*** · 10-24-2006, 10:27 PM

Shana,
I'm so sorry that you're having such a rough time right now. I do agree with you that this boy shouldn't have said anything about that to your friend. Some people just don't have any kind of compassion or even tact. I do understand that it's hurting you to watch your friend suffer. And I do agree that you need to work on your own eating disorder. If she sees you working on your own recovery, she may be interested in how you are doing it and then try it herself. You really can't save her from herself. She has to really want to recover enough to seek out recovery and work a recovery program. You can only share your experience, strength and hope with her and the rest is up to her and God. Please take care of you, Shana. Pray for your friend.
(((((((((((((Caring Hugs))))))))))))))

**Pony** · 10-24-2006, 10:49 PM

Ditto to what Nina said. Shana you are a kind and loving person, I know...but you need to let her go!!!!!!!!!! I am sorry this is hurting you so much, but you can't "fix" her. She has to want it, and she has to seek it out, and she has to ask for it. You need to focus on YOU sweetie.....please take care of you !!!! She needs to seek out a professional.

I know this is hard for you to hear and let go of, but I say this from my heart......you cannot throw your program to the side and forget about your issues for anyone.....let alone for someone that is not yet ready to seek out help. HUGS

10-24-2006, 09:08 PM	#1 (permalink)
renee18 Awaiting Email Confirmation Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Massillon, Ohio Posts: 391	i am lost I am so lost. The friend I have been talking about throwing up well today went bad. A boy went up to her that she knows and was like so how many fingers do you use when you throw up and when and how do you throw up. I can't believe he said that to her. they are good friend but you do not say things like that to someone who has an eating disorder. I am soooooooo angry. We did not talk to her. I am afraid this is getting out of hand and someone higher up needs to step in. I can't hang in here anymore. I am having my own issues with eating and I love this friend so much and I can't see her in this pain anymore. Shana __________________ Count the night by stars, not shadows. Count your life by smiles, not tears.-unknown- I will not fear what the future may held or be held captive to my past

10-24-2006, 10:27 PM	#2 (permalink)
*Nina Kay* Accepting Myself As Is Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Here @ SR. Posts: 2,072	Shana, I'm so sorry that you're having such a rough time right now. I do agree with you that this boy shouldn't have said anything about that to your friend. Some people just don't have any kind of compassion or even tact. I do understand that it's hurting you to watch your friend suffer. And I do agree that you need to work on your own eating disorder. If she sees you working on your own recovery, she may be interested in how you are doing it and then try it herself. You really can't save her from herself. She has to really want to recover enough to seek out recovery and work a recovery program. You can only share your experience, strength and hope with her and the rest is up to her and God. Please take care of you, Shana. Pray for your friend. (((((((((((((Caring Hugs)))))))))))))) __________________ Acceptance is key to my Serenity. Nina Kay

10-24-2006, 10:49 PM	#3 (permalink)
Pony Forum Leader Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: trail of discovery Posts: 2,326	Ditto to what Nina said. Shana you are a kind and loving person, I know...but you need to let her go!!!!!!!!!! I am sorry this is hurting you so much, but you can't "fix" her. She has to want it, and she has to seek it out, and she has to ask for it. You need to focus on YOU sweetie.....please take care of you !!!! She needs to seek out a professional. I know this is hard for you to hear and let go of, but I say this from my heart......you cannot throw your program to the side and forget about your issues for anyone.....let alone for someone that is not yet ready to seek out help. HUGS __________________ "Failure is an EVENT, it is not a person – yesterday really did end last night, and today is your brand new day..." .........unknown The sun always rises, and a new day begins.

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