Wonderings

[Mattie]

Hello,

I am kind of struggling with myself. I am a saved, born-again believer, have been for a few years. I am active in church. I pray everyday. I know God's promises. I try very hard to live right. However, I am addicted to pain pills and pot. The pot I was hooked on before I got saved, and the pain pills after following a car wreck. I hate this addiction and want so badly to be free of it. I have tried almost everything, and pray earnestly for deliverance. I have been to the altar and prayed for. I know God wants me free. I want me free. Why aren't I free?

I know that God works in His own time; I guess I am struggling with why He would choose to take time in this. What am I doing wrong? Is there something I am doing wrong, or something I should be doing that I'm not? I know people who have been set free from addictions immediately, and some that took longer. What is hindering me from being set free? I hate this and want rid of it.

Any words of encouragement?

Thanks,
Mattie

[splendra]

(((((((((Mattie)))))))))

Possibly you are still working on the surrender part of your recovery. It takes what it takes ya know... Jesus has His hand held out and is willing to take this burden from you as soon as you are ready to give it to Him.

Onething we have to remember is the free will. It is the onething that separates us from all other forms of life on this planet. The Lord wants your willingness He wants you to chose to give.

Many people get angry at God for allowing certain things war,poverty,disease without looking at the fact that our choices lead to these things not Gods will....

Jesus heals those who seek Him. When Jesus walked on the earth the people came to Him as He walked. Faith comes by hearing the word. People heard about Jesus and believed and sought Him. Comb through the New Testiment and see the circumstances of the miracles of healing that Jesus performed they are examples for us to follow. Who did Jesus seek? Who sought Him?

I really believe that we are not free because we don't know truth. The lie keeps us enslaved to sin. If I'm not free then I know I'm still believing lies.

John 8:32 - And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

I can read my bible and learn the scripture, but it has always been God who reveals the truth to me. Sometimes he uses scripture and sometimes he teaches me through life's lessons, which brings light to the scriptures.

Surrender is very important, but I found I can't even do that without God. There are areas of my life I've surrendered and other areas that I haven't yet. Knowing the truth sets me free to let go.

John 8:32 - And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

John 14:6 - Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4:7 KJV)

Matthew 6:33 - But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Matthew 7:7 - Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

Matthew 7:8 - For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

John 6:28 - Then said they unto him, What shall we do, that we might work the works of God?
John 6:29 - Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.

Romans 7

1 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he liveth? 2 For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. 3 So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man. 4 Wherefore, my brethren, ye also are become dead to the law by the body of Christ; that ye should be married to another, even to him who is raised from the dead, that we should bring forth fruit unto God. 5 For when we were in the flesh, the motions of sins, which were by the law, did work in our members to bring forth fruit unto death. 6 But now we are delivered from the law, that being dead wherein we were held; that we should serve in newness of spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter. 7 What shall we say then? Is the law sin? God forbid. Nay, I had not known sin, but by the law: for I had not known lust, except the law had said, Thou shalt not covet. 8 But sin, taking occasion by the commandment, wrought in me all manner of concupiscence. For without the law sin was dead. 9 For I was alive without the law once: but when the commandment came, sin revived, and I died. 10 And the commandment, which was ordained to life, I found to be unto death. 11 For sin, taking occasion by the commandment, deceived me, and by it slew me. 12 Wherefore the law is holy, and the commandment holy, and just, and good. 13 Was then that which is good made death unto me? God forbid. But sin, that it might appear sin, working death in me by that which is good; that sin by the commandment might become exceeding sinful. 14 For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. 15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. 16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. 17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. 20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. 22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? 25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Romans 8

1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death. 3 For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh: 4 That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. 5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit. 6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. 8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God. 9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his. 10 And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you. 12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh. 13 For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live. 14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. 15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. 16 The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: 17 And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together. 18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. 19 For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God. 20 For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope, 21 Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now. 23 And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body. 24 For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for? 25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it. 26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. 27 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. 29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. 30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified. 31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? 32 He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? 33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth. 34 Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. 37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. 38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

[Mattie]

Thank you both very much for your replies. I can relate to what MG said about not even being able to surrender without God. I know I'm that way. I ask GOd to help me surrender completely. *Sigh* There are times when I feel like just giving up, but I can't. I can't even if I want to. I just keep trying. It just gets discouraging sometimes. I am determined, though. I believe with all my heart that God will get me through this. I know cannot do it myself, so I am learning to rely completely on Him.

Thanks again, all.

Mattie

[splendra]

Mattie-

And He will see you though....