Forgiveness

[cmc]

Daily New Life
Sunday, June 6, 2010
The Fruit of Forgiveness

Bible Reading: 2 Corinthians 2:5-8

We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

Some of the things we've done have earned us disapproval and possibly a loss of love. We have found that some people in our lives only love us if they can approve of our behavior. We may have struggled with bitterness toward them because we feel like they have been trying to punish us. If our "sins" have been made public, we may assume that we've lost the love of everyone who disapproves of our actions. This fear of rejection might deter us from reaching out to make amends.

In the young Corinthian church, a man was cut off from church fellowship when his sins were made public. After he turned around and tried to make amends, some people refused to welcome him back into the church. The apostle Paul told them, "[Remember] the man who caused all the trouble. . . . Most of you opposed him, and that was punishment enough. Now, however, it is time to forgive and comfort him. Otherwise he may be overcome by discouragement. So I urge you now to reaffirm your love for him" (2 Corinthians 2:5-8). Some people will follow this advice and reaffirm their love for you when you go to them.

There will be some people who will respond with forgiveness, comfort, acceptance, and love. This will help us overcome the grief, the bitterness, and the discouragement we may feel. Their forgiveness will help us to move on with our recovery.

When we seek to make amends, we risk rejection; when we fail to do so, we risk losing the joy of forgiveness.




New Life Ministries

Taken from The Life Recovery Devotional: Thirty Meditations from Scripture for Each Step in Recovery by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop. Copyright © 1991 by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.

[Angelic17]

Forgiveness is one of the most important things a person can do. It is as neccessary as LOVE. If a person does not forgive, he will never have anyone in his life. For we all make mistakes, and are in need of forgiveness at some point in our lives.
I had a very sad lesson on forgiveness. I was mad at my mom for being an alcoholic.
Her drinking ruined all of her childrens lives. My 2 brothers, my sister and myself. We all suffered as a result of my moms drinking. So, I didn't talk to my mom. I was a mother myself, and felt that I would never put alcohol or a drug before my child.
So for two years, I didn't talk to my mom. Then out of nowhere, she died.
Just like that, gone. I cannot begin to tell you, how sad I was. Not only over the death of my mom, but because I didn't tell her, that I forgive her. I really learned from that experience. I have learned to forgive, and even if I don't want to reconcile with someone, I still forgive. I learn from my mistakes. Thanks for this post CMC
It hit home for me.

[cmc]

Thanks for sharing your experience, strength and hope; I'm sure that what you have written will touch and help others in a very deep way- just as it has for me. I'm certain that by your sharing some other one(s) may be spared the pain and grief you went through.

I have learned to forgive, and even if I don't want to reconcile with someone, I still forgive. I learn from my mistakes.

Being the enabler/codependent in past, it was much easier for me to forgive others for far worse than to forgive myself for less. This daily devotion and your reply remind me to offer myself as well as others the same "forgiveness, comfort, acceptance, and love" mentioned in the devotional reading.

God bless you, Angelic.

[utopia]

I like that idea that I can "forgive" even if I don't want to reconcile with another. I can let go of the feeling of being hurt and the injustice of it all without having to be best buddies.

I have learnt in recovery that my stuff, is not that I don't forgive, but that I judge another for their reactions and responses but it only hurts me to feel resentful and that is my thing, to let go of my judging of another for I cannot discern anothers motives most of the time but I can know what is good for me, and what I need from those close to me.

From those who have hurt me I come to love them again but also come to keep myself safe and grow slowly and gently in trusting again. For me, the forgiveness is letting go of the wall against others but keeping my boundaries in place.

[Angelic17]

CMC Thank you so much for your blessings and all of your beautiful posts. Forgiveness is so important. I cannot tell you the hurt and pain my sons addiction has put me through. My hair turned white and fell out. I would circle through my bedroom at 4 and 5 in the morning, and my husband would wake up and say, MY GOD, you need to relax. I would cry and say, It's Joseph, he might die. He's out there, I don't know where he is. I didn't eat or sleep, and even though I knew GOD tells me to trust him, and not to fear, I still had fear. My brother did from an overdose 12 years ago, and I was afraid that would be my sons fate.

At times, I felt so angry and bitter, because of the deep pain my sons addiction inflicted on me. But within minutes that pain would turn to forgiveness. One thing I know as a mother, I will always forgive my son. Especially now that he is clean and on the right track again. GOD is a good, loving, and merciful GOD. He heard me, and answered me. I could hold a grudge against those who have hurt me, including my son. But, that would only hurt me and hold me hostage. Unforgiveness is as much a disease as any other illness. It causes great harm, to ourself and others. I always try to do, what GOD wants me to do, even though sometimes it's just so difficult. Like I said, if I don't want to forgive someone who has hurt me, I do anyway. I don't have to reconcile. Even if it's family. But I do forgive. My mothers death taught me to forgive.

Utopia, thank you for your kind words. I know that GOD is the judge of all of us. I have no right to judge anyone. It was 13 years ago when my mom died, and I was still inmature at that time. Angry about my childhood of H E L L. Through prayer, and understanding I have forgiven my mother, and I think she knows it too. She was a good mom, with a disease. I have learned not to judge anyone, even the worst addict out there, for they are human beings, and GOD loves them no matter what.