He's OUT!!!!!!!

[NeedingHelp7]

Today I put my AS (18 yrs) out forever. No more chances. I packed his clothes. They now sit on the porch.
I called the police, and made another domestic report. This is it. He won't be allowed in again.

But I'm afraid of him coming through the windows like he does every night when I have the doors locked.

Please pray for safety for me and my little one, 5yrs old.

Thankyou for being here and bless you all,
NH7

[suki44883]

I'm sorry to hear you had to do this, but I can understand how it could come down to it. Can you lock your windows or wedge something in so they cannot be opened from the outside? Prayers going out to you. (((HUGS)))

[NeedingHelp7]

Hi suki, The weather is very hot here and fans are used in the windows, but yes I could wedge them at night, and leave some of the upperlevel windows open, ones he can't get to.
It's just a pain I would have to do that at night and each time I leave the house in this weather. I guess it's the only answer, or to move, right?

[suki44883]

Yeah, that would be a pain, but maybe only for a few days until he gets the message that he's not welcome there. You said you made a domestic report with the police...was he violent with you? Have you thought about a restraining order?

[MNGirlyGirl]

I'm sorry that it has come to this, but you have to do whatever you need to to take care of yourself and your 5 year old. If he breaks in, I hope you will call the police. I hope you are going to alanon -- you can get some very good support there.

[Lily]

I am praying for protection for you and your 5 year old. That the Lord would place a hedge of protection around you both. Also I pray that the Lord would use this in your sons life to bring him to his knees and that there would be a true transformation in his life. In JESUS name, Amen

[NeedingHelp7]

I answered the phone to him today. He begged to come home. He wants to be a family again. He wants to start over. He promised to do this and that. Promised never to do this and that. He said he slept behind the YMCA one night. He begged, pleaded and cried just to take a shower and brush his teeth. He said he was robbed $197.00 yesterday that he was saving for a car or apt. I felt so sad for him. I told him I can't make a decision right now to let him back home. His clothes are still all sitting on the porch. He had no where to bring them. He wants to bring them back in the house.

This is difficult. Help!!!

NH7

[Gertiegirl]

Oh hun... Thats sounds awful. I prayer for comfort and guidence for you. I pray that God will have his hand on your son and that he will feel his presence keeping him safe. I pray for the right people (not you) will intervene in this situation that he may get the help he needs, and that the Lord would provide his basic daily needs.

Trust in the Lord darl, with all your heart and all your mind. He has promised to provide for us, and if you ask it from your heart he WILL interceed for your son in this situation and comfort you. Use this situation to draw nearer to God, and do not let yourself be drawn in by guilt. As a loving mother this feels like its ripping your heart out I am sure, but you are doing the best you can for yourself, your AS and your 5yr old needs your protection more. He will only reach out for the help and intervention that he needs when you don't enable his behaviour anymore - and if he is desperate enough, he will seek help. Let him get that desperate. If you rescue him again he will not change. You are doing the right thing - stay strong!!!

Luvvies. PM me more specific prayer requests any time!

[CarolD]

Prayers for y'all as you go thru this painful time.

[cmc]

Prayers for your safety and serenity.

[lizw]

I hear this a lot in AA and it is so true. I feel for your son also because I am sure he means everything he says to you. I hope you have checked out Al Anon in your area, they help many many families like your own every day of the year. You don't have to go through all this alone.

[least]

I pray for the strength and wisdom for you to do the right thing and be safe. I'm sorry you have to go thru this, but sometimes drastic measures are called for.

[NeedingHelp7]

Thankyou all for your love, prayers, words of wisdom and understanding.

This is still so difficult. I let him in and talked to him. This talk filled with all his promises, how much he missed us, this is his home, etc.... He did promise to go to Reformers Unanimous, (Christian Addiction Program) on Friday evening (we'll see if he follows through, I hope so). He was previously kicked out of outpatient treatment because he did so many no shows.

He stayed at his girlfriends house last night. Talked to me again today, but he is back to disrespect, swearing in front of his brother, asking for money 20 times over, and now mixed up as to what he is going to do.

My stress level is up 80% again overnight. I feel we just can't live together, as much as he is my son, and I love him, it's just doesn't seem like it's going work unless God does miracles.

NH7

[NeedingHelp7]

I do go to Alanon, but for the summer I won't be able to attend. Son gets off school bus at the same time the meeting is going on.

I never would have dreamed of being 43 yrs old and having to go through the painful bologne AS and AH bring (yes both). I feel so stuck sometimes. But I feel better (peaceful), when they are not bombarding my life with thier dysfunction.
Some days are lonelier than others. I only wish they were better, and on the right road with God. I do wish they could be home, sober minded, and we could be a happy family.

For now, just getting through the day without my head spinning over them is a blessing.

Please keep praying for us.

Thanks again,
NH7

[best]

Windows... They sell a nice AC that fits in a window and cools a room. They cost less then $100. Haier AC.

As for your son... Oh poor me, I have no place to go. Seems he found a place right fast enough. Was robbed.... or more like it...spent the money and was just trying to get more from you.

His actions...over time (not just a week or three) will tell you if you should let him back in. When he asks, an answer could be... Prove yourself over time that you are able to follow the rules of the house and at a time "you" feel ready, the both of you can talk about it then. No promises.

As it tells us in Romans... Send them out in hopes that they realize what they are giving up and added hopes that they return to their proper senses.

You are doing the best thing you can for him at this moment.
Prayers go with you.

[BUTTERFLY-7]

cleaning after my mess

[MNGirlyGirl]

This has to be so difficult, but I sure would be tempted to show him the door. Do you have rules for him (no swearing, disrespecting, etc.) to follow? You could tell him once he breaks one, that's it... he's out again. Sounds like he has a girlfriend he can stay with so he doesn't have to be out on the street. Prayers going out for you!