New to the site! Looking for help.......

[bigpoppa]

Hello, I have been trying with almost no success to become sober. I have done better lately because I am trying to rededicate my life to Christ. However I am nowhere near being ok. I have seven days ahead of me that I will be working at night. I see this as the grand opportunity to quit drinking again.
So far when I talk to people about quitting no ones situation is like mine. It is really hard to go into great detail because I am a terrible typer. To make a long story short , I have been very fortunate and God gave me a loving overly tolerant wife. I have been lucky to not be in any accidents and i dont have any serious health issues, YET! I guess you would say that i am a highly functional alcoholic.
My main reason I want to quit drinking is for spiritual reasons. My flesh always seems to overcome my will to be more Christlike.
I have even stated that it would be impossible for me to quit and any one who was able to quit obviously was not as bad as me.
Iguess I am coming here for guidance and any form of accountability I can muster up. I want to change my life and I want to do it for God, because I would rather stay doing what i am but I know it is wrong. Please help!!!

[cmc]

Hi bigpoppa. Welcome to SR.
When I have a problem I seek the company and counsel of those who have had the same experience and have found a way to change. I also try to surround myself with others who have sustained progress and/or success.

This is my version of what alot of members of AA call "one drunk helping another drunk."

It really doesn't matter what the problem is a long as I take action to seek help. If I want it badly enough, I will do what it takes to find what others have.

I've attended Alanon for many years because the people in those rooms have found a proven method of living with a greater measure of peace and serenity despite having an alcoholic friend or loved one.

So, I'm sure by now you know which direction I am heading. Why don't you give AA a try? Lots and lots of people have and you will meet many with lengthy sobriety times who can show you how they were, what they did and how their lives are now.

[bigpoppa]

I have been to Alcoholic meetings, met counselors and I always quit because I walk away with the feeling and attitude that "If these people can quit, they are not as bad off as I am." . Maybe it is time to try something again. For one thing, I am ashift worker and I cannot meet on a consistent night. I know it is an excuse.

[Katecan]

Welcome to SR bigpoppa. My reasons for quitting are similar to yours. I want a closer relationship to Christ so he can work in my life. I know the alcohol is affecting my purpose in the life that God has planned for me. I feel deep down that I'm supposed to quit, like a tug on my heart that won't go away and has become so strong lately that I know it's now time to work on this. This place here (SR) has many people who have acheived sobriety and are living full happy lives. I'm sure you can find something here that will help you find that as well.

God Bless you on your journey.

[Ken777]

Hi Big Poppa--

Welcome to SR.

One of the things that strikes me about what you have said is that you see the drink as the ultimate problem. The drink is but a symptom of the problem. The ultimate challenge is full and complete surrender to Christ. The good news is that when we pray and ask God to help us surrender, the Holy Spirit helps us do that!

I've been sober now for 3 1/2 years and I can tell you that without working on the REASONS you drink, quiting will remain a constant struggle. For me, that meant counselling, rehab, meetings, etc. I still face major and minor struggles in my everyday life, but I have found a way to do that without drinking. I know that you can do the same.

God bless you!

Ken

[bigpoppa]

Reasons I drink???? i am not sure I follow. I dont ever look for reasons. I just do it. Maybe I dont understand. Goin on 2 days without a drink. Its a start!

[dgillz]

"If these people can quit, they are not as bad off as I am."

You need to go to a few more meetings, and hear some drunkalogues. I was a pretty bad case, and I guarantee you that you will find people that were worse drunks than you - and they have recovered!

Some of these horror stories will have you amazed that the person made it back. They will be uplifting stories that will reaffirm your faith in the man upstairs. I know that was the case with me.

[best]

Welcome poppa

Admit we have a problem
Admit we have a problem controling the problem.
Seek help and support beyond self.

I have a problem.
I can't control it on my own.
Help me Lord.

I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.

When my strength is not enough, He will supply what is needed...every time I ask.

How to stay on the right path....
Don't pick up that first one.

[Lily]

Big Poppa,

I kinda have a story like you.....I was a highly functioning addict. I would mess up w/ pain pills over a weekend and have to repent once again. Not only was I involved in the praise and worship band, but also in women's ministries. I have a wonderful husband and 2 great boys, but I could not do it alone. I cannot tell you how many times I cried out to the Lord to remove my compulsion and to forgive me. I was sooo sick of living a double life and going perhaps 2 months w/out a drug, only to relapse once again. I hated it. my flesh was soooo weak. I was soooo tired of grieving the holy spirit.

I will tell you what worked for me....finally....I went to NA. Even though it is a secular program and I highly doubt anyone knew Christ in there, it is working for me. The accountability w/ other addicts, or in your case AA alcoholics will do wonders! I was even priviledged to pray with a young man after a meeting a few weeks ago whom I had over heard say he wanted Jesus in his heart. So after the meeting I approached him and shared a tract with him and took him thru it.

The hard thing is though, as a Christian for me thinking I had one up on these folks cuz I knew the true God Jesus Christ and they were still searching....but I will tell you one thing, these ppl had something I wanted and that was clean time....so I surrended to the proccess and now I am gaining credibilty once again w/ my family and have even made some un-saved friends whom I am praying for to get saved! I do not do a lot of the NA functions (bowling, picnics, camping, etc) and such cuz I would much rather be w/ my family and my church family, but I am starting to really love these guys and we help each other. It has been both a humbling and an eye opening experience for me. i have been reaching out to new comers and it is a ministry for me on the side of my other ministry involvement.

God can use you where ever you are, if you are willing. While this forum is great, maybe the Lord would have you get out there and meet the lost face to face and see if there is anything you could learn from them, and then perhaps after you get some sober time under your belt you could inturn share with them about the hope that lies in you.....you can share w/ ppl openly after meetings after asking permission if they would like to hear. (that works best for me)

Blessings, Sheila

[bigpoppa]

I will probably cover this in another post but I want to get my thoughts together before just running off at the mouth. But get this, Why in the world would anyone who is not a Christian want to be sober? What is the point. I love the drinking life, I know it is wrong though! That is my sole reason for quitting, none other! Your thoughts???

[suki44883]

Why in the world would anyone who is not a Christian want to be sober?

Well, maybe because they don't want to kill themselves or pickle their liver. Not being a "Christian" doesn't mean you're a worthless POS.

[bigpoppa]

Suki , I did not mean to offend. The only reason I have a consious about anything is my sense of what it means to be a Christian. It doesnt mean you are wothless not to be a Christian "yet" but without seeking Christ it will mean that one day.
I was saying this......my reason for not drinking is because I am trying to be a better Christian. Drinking is wrong! If I didnt have to answer for my actions to anyone but society I would do a lot of things that I dont do now. Drinking would be #1 on that list.

[best]

Originally Posted by bigpoppa

Why in the world would anyone who is not a Christian want to be sober?

Because I would turn into a total butt head when drinking. I was a danger to myself and those around me. (Keys and beer don't mix) I didn't like the imoral things I would do when drinking. I didn't like the fear I had of going to jail or killing someone because of my drinking. Was geting fired from jobs or quit jobs every 2 years because of my poor attitude that was brought out even more with my drinking.

Now fast forward a few years to the point I became a Christian...
I now see how much more productive I can be without alcohol.
I see how much of life I can enjoy and remember without alcohol.
and with Christ as my Lord and savior... I see HUGE changes in my attitude where stopping the alcohol intake only gained me small changes.

The more I learn about the dangers of alcohol, the more I find reason to not drink. Better health being a big one.

[bigpoppa]

Ok, I am following. However, I will say this.........God is the only reason I am quitting ! If I had been depending on other reasons I would never consider it. I want my fear of God to turn toward more love for God but ultimately the only reason I am quitting is because it is wrong in his eyes! P E R I O D !

[Lily]

I can remember acknowledging being an addict in 87 and wanting to get clean. I didn't get saved till 89. Before Christ I had relationships with others that were suffering.

I hope this isn't as hard for you as it was for me....I had to come to that place in my life where I was willing to humble myself and learn from others, even ppl who didn't share my love for the Lord cuz they had something I wanted.....I also had to learn that w/out recovery there is no Jesus (I could not properly worship Christ when drunk and when sober the guilt was killing my relationship with him and everyone else in my family)