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06-26-2003, 04:30 PM
| #1 (permalink) | |
| Nancy  Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 261
| Things we want to remember
Folks: I would like to begin a discussion about some of the positive things we remember our parents teaching us as children. While I am an adult child of two alcoholics, and I never want to forget those lessons, I also want to remember the many good things my parents taught me. I hope you will join me. Allow me to start: My Daddy went to heaven September 17, 2001. One thing I remember happening not too long before he died (he was a doctor, family practice, and he knew he was dying): My father worked right up to the last three weeks of his last seventy-seventh year. He loved his work. His patients were his friends and extended family. But when he would come home, he would mostly stay in the bed, since he was suffering from some physical ailments. One night, as I softly entered his bedroom, where I found the door closed, but not locked, I found him, not just kneeling, but prostrate before the Lord praying his heart out. I know that this was meant to be a private moment for him, but I learned so much from that. His alcoholism kept him humble throughout his life, and in some ways, that was a good thing. I am grateful that my father set such a fine example in humilty. Nancy Quote:
__________________ Nancy | |
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06-26-2003, 10:27 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs  Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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This is a hard one for me..everything seems to be kind of linked together..very interesing....I need to think too  Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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06-27-2003, 12:23 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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This is going to be very interesting and complex..but here goes.. My dad taught me to love my children with all of my heart. Not to be selfish with my kids. Never to touch my kids in a rage, actually never to allow myself to be in a rage. Never to hate my kids for acting like someone else. That whatever hateful things you say to a person, takes a lifetime for them to overcome. The warning signs of a true cold heart. (I only had contact with my dad until I was 5, at which time he gave me a very severe beating) My mom taught me never to deny to your kids things that happened in you pasts. To face up to things, for the sake of you children. To be considerate of the feelings of others. How to read people..I have the ability to know what kind of person someone is immediatley, and most times how they are thinking. Never to support drug/alcohol usage in my home. To see the beauty in everything. To be honest, even when it hurts a feller real bad. What an angry person does to their own self in their life. This was my shot at this post...I think I still have some thinking to do though..which is good Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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06-27-2003, 04:51 PM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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Nancy They look so much alike I cant tell there is two there!!!  LOLSeriously though, beautiful children!! Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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06-27-2003, 04:52 PM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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thats better now theres two!!! gorgeous!!
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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07-01-2003, 03:59 PM
| #13 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Anywhere, USA
Posts: 27
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Okay, I'll give this a try. I will do my best to not be sarcastic, but I can't make any promises! My dad taught me how to ride a bike, skate, fish, clean squirrels and rabbits (none of his sons wanted to help him do this), drive a car & a motorcycle, My step-mom taught me how to paint my nails, how to properly make my bed, how to do laundry without turning the underwear pink, telephone etiquette (girls NEVER call boys!), and table manners. I feel some sarcasm coming on, so I will stop right here for now. 
__________________ Perhaps God had chosen me in my time to detail what I learned from all the madness about. :kisshug: |
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07-01-2003, 04:20 PM
| #14 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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Melissa I think you done a very good job!!! Thats hard isnt it??? Everything is so tangled together..but we do need to give credit where credit is due!!! Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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07-01-2003, 11:05 PM
| #16 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Ohio
Posts: 444
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My mom died when I was 11, so I'm not sure I can give you anything profound--here! My mom taught me to knit, crochet, embroider, play rummy and crazy 8's. She taught me to iron! And how to get everything done early in the day so you can enjoy the rest of the day doing something a lot more fun! My dad, hmmm, well, I think I'll stop right there (I'm with you MelissaM) My Foster Mom taught me to be disciplined in everything I did. She showed me how a real family was suppose to act. My Foster Dad, whom I dearly loved and respected, taught me that when someone does something for you--even if it's not exactly the way you wanted it to be--you be thankful. He taught me kindness, and caring, thinking about others and their needs, how to discipline without raising a hand or his voice--he taught by example. I wished I didn't have to wait until I was 15 to move into his life--I might not be a codie today! Lyn
__________________ If God is for us, who can be against us? |
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07-02-2003, 04:47 AM
| #17 (permalink) |
| Nancy Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 261
| to lyn_blossom78
To lyn_blossom78, Lyn, that's beautiful. Thanks for sharing. And thank all of you for the kind words about my youngans. You all have helped to make this a good day. My friend and guidance counselor at the elementary school where I worked last year used to helpfully remind us that the way you start the day, or your class, has a profound effect on the way it goes. So... "Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours [or seconds] that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime [and then just do it again and made it a productivem, positive perpetual cycle]." Nancy
__________________ Nancy |
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07-02-2003, 08:14 AM
| #18 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
| Just had to share this..
My fondest memories.. When we were kids, my brother and I, we would spend the summer at my grandpas' farm house. We would spring clean his house for him. My mom was pretty happy there, and our whole world seemed to change. It became a secure, sort of nurturing world. Me and my brother dug fishing worms and went fishing in the pond..if we caught something, grandpa would clean it and mom would cook it. We loaded up all the makings on the back of a wagon hooked to the tractor, invited cousins and had cook outs in the field at night. Grandpa worked during the day sharpening sticks for hot dogs and marshmallows. At night, I remember being clean, fed and going to bed in a clean bed and room. The curtains were freshly washed and mom hung them wet on the windows. The breeze would come through the window and smelled so wonderfully fresh. I could hear the crickets chirping outside as I fell asleep. I discovered a crooked little creek with a rock over hanging it...it was pretty far back in the woods, but well worth the walk. I found such peace and serenity there. I carried a glass of water sometimes out across the plowed field to my grandpa..I thought he must be so thirsty. I spilled some of it on the way, and it took me a while to get to him, but he always took it, drank it, and told me thank you. My grandpa helped me pick things from the garden, and made a roadside sign for me. I sold the vegetables we picked to passing people and was allowed to keep the money. It wasnt much money, but to me it was a fortune, and I felt so proud. This taught me something very valuable I think..that I could honestly earn money..it was not actually an elusive thing that one could never get. These summers at grandpas' taught alot of wonderful things, including the fact that things can always change. Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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07-02-2003, 08:20 PM
| #20 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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Nancy I dont want to pop your bubble..but this version was edited! LOL No sarcasim here, or negative things..only the good. You are not alone..I too dreamed of a better life. my grandpa was german and could be down right cruel at times..but we wont go there..at least not here!Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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07-03-2003, 05:30 AM
| #21 (permalink) |
| Nancy Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 261
| To Sky
Dear Sky, You have to understand that I am not completely sane... "Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity" implies the presence of insanity, while one works on the steps to restore the sanity. I don't have a problem admitting that for whatever reasons, denial, etc., I can be downright delusional at times. ANd I appreciate the lightness and sense of humor that you share. Sometimes I have fun with it and just let myself enjoy it. As long as I realize it is what it is, fantasy, like you did. I think you are a very talented writer, though, and I am qualified to teach high school english, except, I changed majors and didn't finish student teaching, so I ought to know, girl! You have got it! If you can make me feel like I am there, you have arrived as a writer! Love ya, Nancy "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." "Just for today I will live through this day only and not try to tackle all my problems at once. I can do for twelve hours [or minutes or seconds perpetually] what would appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime." Nancy
__________________ Nancy |
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07-03-2003, 07:56 AM
| #22 (permalink) |
| Big kitty nose hugs Join Date: May 2003 Location: Center of The World
Posts: 1,261
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." "Just for today I will live through this day only and not try to tackle all my problems at once. I can do for twelve hours [or minutes or seconds perpetually] what would appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime." Nancy Thank you for giving me this today, what a nice way to start out the day. I do not even know what sane is..i use to think i did, but now..... Thank you for the compliment about my writing..one of my struggles is to accept nice things people say about me, i have always wanted to take them away from me in some way or other. I think you are a wonderful lady, and i am glad that you are here with us. Today i will keep in mind the above incentive that you gave me, and work on digesting your wonderful compliment. Your sister in recovery Love in spirit Sky
__________________ Love In Spirit, Sky Where my heart is....... http://Writing.Com/authors/skyisfalling02 "Never Give In, Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never." ~~Sir Winston Churchill~~ |
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07-04-2003, 05:20 AM
| #23 (permalink) |
| Nancy Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 261
| To Sky
To Sky, Why, thank you, Sky, and I surely feel the same way about you, too. Today we celebrate our independence, our freedom. I am trying to appropriately remember not only our great freedoms we enjoy as a nation, but also the freedom from addiction. As a codependent, I think independence day is a great way for me to remember how great it is to be independent. There are positive sides to being free of my exes. To being just me. Have a great fourth everybody. Love, Nancy |
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