A terrible place

[indigo]

Please excuse me, I don't know where to start. I am in a terrible place at the moment and for once I am at a loss for words as to how to explain, I am surrounded by death and dying. My oldest son is in a mental hospital, which is the best place for him as he has been terrorizing us. He has been drinking copious amounts of alcohol and drugs and he is on meds for his bi-polar. That is just the tip of the iceberg, I feel I am broken into a thousand pieces and I can't seem to put myself together again, please dear friends I need prayer....iI don't know how long I can hang on in this nightmare.

LOVE TO ALL

[PlanoTexican]

All of our prayers in our home today are for you.

May God bless you.

[liveweyerd]

AWWWW, Indigo....I am so sorry. I waited to respond here last because I knew it would be the most difficult....because I know no words that can help ease any of the pain and madness.
You have always been SUPERWOMAN....is there anywhere you can go for a retreat and rest and let someone help you and minister to you with meals and such so that you can get some little distance and rest for yourself?
In fact....I volunteer my hubby if you want to hangout on a little farm in Florida and play with banty chickens. There's a bunch of new babies. I amused myself training them. He would make your coffee, feed you and allow you all the rest and space you need. He is supportive and understanding.
And respectful....he wouldn't hit on you, I promise! He is a good listener, but also understands when one does not want to talk. The change of scenery seems to do me alot of good sometimes.

[frankie_b]

Indigo, I'm so sorry you are feeling overwhelmed. Please know I am praying for you and I hope you can get some rest and get away from it all for awhile.
You so deserve a break to regroup your strength, refresh your spirit.
Hugs

[michski]

I'm so sorry life is giving you a headbanger right now. It's all sounds like real crazy making stuff. Try to do the next right thing and take REALLY REALLY REALLY good care of YOU first even though it may seem at the moment to be abnormally selfish!!

You are in my prayers tonight!

[miss communicat]

Indigo

My heart goes out to you. I have been in a similar situation with my daughter, and there is nothing more painful. I will pray for the stuation to be turned around and for deep peace to come into your hearts.

[indigo]

Thank you all I have to face this and daily it get's worse, I am using all my spirituallity for a good outcome. I fear though I am losing my grip.

Thanks again I love each and everyone of you.

indie

[Smyle]

Indigo,
What a scary place you are at right now. I pray for you and your family. I know you are in pain and I hope this passes soon. Please hang on and take care of yourself. Prayers ...

[splendra]

(((((Indigo))))

I have been concerned for you for a long time. I know you have lost several people who are very close to you in a very short period of time and that it is difficult to grieve all of these losses. Now your son is having serious problems too. It's not your fault you know....I know you are a very deep thinker and that deep thinkers can get depressed more so than others because they take stuff so personally.

I would like to ask you if maybe you are stuck in the depression stage of your grief over one of your losses. To me this stage of grief is the worst part but the good news is the acceptance stage follows. Perhaps you could look at all of your losses and do a little acessment on which stage of grief you maybe in with each one of them.

Melody Beaties book "Co-dependent No More" has a very good chapter on grief maybe you could use it as a guide through your grief....

Lot's of hugs and prayers going out for you. Be well my sweet...

[BigSis]

Annie.... reaching out to us is good, and the prayers are heartfelt and continuing.

I would suggest you also consider additional help, beginning with a physical checkup to ensure there isn't anything covert going on... then perhaps an appointment with a counselor - perhaps one who specializes in grief issues.

I know how hard it is to reach out when you are feeling like you can barely hold on... but trust that HP will guide you in the right direction and start paddling.

I'm with you.... my prayers continue ... unabated. (((((Indigo))))))

[wingsfree]

My dearest sister....(((((((Annie)))))))) my heart is with you in these troubled times, I feel your pain and it saddens me, wish I could take some of it away. I wish I had some comforting words to help you through this. It's so hard to understand why life's burden's need to be so heavy, I will continue to pray that things soon lighten up your way. Just know you're never ever alone....we're all walking along side of you, holding your hands real tight. Sending all my love and strength to you, shut your eyes Annie, you will feel it.

Remeber this sis

"Don't Quit"

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but do not quit.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit-
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit.

-----------------------

Please stay in the light...sending you mine to help you through.



Love you.......Denise

[gypsyrose]

I'm kinda new around here and see you've been here for awhile so I'm guessing you are far wiser than I but I wanted you to know that I feel for you. It sounds like you are going through an overwhelming amount right now and you know what, I think that sometimes it's perfectly okay to take a break and wallow in grief for awhile. I'd get plenty of sleep, drink hot milk, eat my favorite 70% imported dark chocolate, watch mindless entertainment or educational documentaries and just know that allowing myself to fall apart for awhile is okay. It will probably pass. If it didn't pass, if I felt stuck there, then I'd worry about what to do about it. There are plenty of ways to get back to enjoying life but sometimes, I think it's okay to just take a break from it all.

[Sugasnaps]

Hey there Indigo,

I'm so sorry to hear about your anguish. It is good that you are reaching out to us here for support... do you have someone locally that you can go to for a more tangible support boost? I know no one can take your situation away and make everything okay. But, maybe if you found a support group somewhere near you that you can share your experiences with it would lift some of the burdon from your shoulders. Sometimes just getting it out and screaming it to the mountain tops can alleviate that feeling of opression. I sure wish that we all could make things better for you.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Suga

[BSPGirl]

I'll send good thoughts, Indigo.

[indigo]

I am still here trembling in my boots but I am going to try my hardest to get myself together, I know I am strong and weak at the same time, all your kind words are lifting me. I get to see my shrink next tuesday and in the meantime I am handing the problem over to the universal one, it's hard to let go though.

love to all indie

[Five]

I am thinking of you Indigo.

Take care.

[MamaGoose]

(((( indigo ))))

Prayers for strength for you to get through this.

Take good care of yourself.

[GoldenGutters]

Oh honey, you hang in there okay.......

Usually god drops pebbles in the pond, but sometimes he drops a big ol' boulder. Don't let the waves wash you away from us.

[PaperDolls]

I'm thinking of you are you're family Annie. I'm so sorry things are rough for you right now. Keep being strong.

Hugs,
doll

[amymarie]

Annie,
You are always such an inspiration for me- my prayers are with you and I truly hope you pull through this soon...
Much love your way-
AmyMarie

[LovingMom]

Just wanted you to know that you are being thought about and prayed over.

{{{{{{hugs from my heart to yours}}}}}}

[liveweyerd]

big hugs being sent to you Indigo. Let us know how you are when you are able.

[BigSis]

Annie - Hoping today is a better one. ((((Indigo))))

[indigo]

They are letting son out of hospital, saying he has been a "model" patient, they have seen through his ability to turn things his way when he want's and say we need a miracle to change him. The whole family are so ill with it (and all the other stuff).

He say's he will see an analiyst sp. We are trying to stay strong and have told him he is not welcome in our home unless he changes.

How hard does it have to get? how do you cope?

LOVE indie

[historyteach]

(((Annie)))
My dear friend...you've been through so very much in such a short time.

We never know what's coming right around the corner. But, we can protect ourselves from some things. Your son for example. It's up to him to change, and you can't help him. You've got to help yourself right now.

I cope by trying hard to do one thing in each of the following catorgories each day. Physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Yes, it's hard. Especially when we are so drained to begin with. Start slowly, and make a committment to do one thing. Slowly add others. All the while, taking it one day at a time.

My love and prayers are with you, Annie...
For your complete refuah shleyma -- the renewal of your body and spirit.

Shalom!