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04-17-2006, 04:37 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,903
| i have learned a lot
about human nature-we are pack animals....if there is one who thinks outside the box then they are ousted out.....I would have been burnt at the stake by now several hundred years ago.....in fact i know there are people who wouldnt hesitate to string me up now!!!! i am unique...there are very few people who can really appreciate the person i am without judgement i feel love...i feel negativity...... I am open....to be loved and to be hurt and rejected......but im learning that its ok i live in a parralel universe much of the time I feel disconeccted because i am seeking MY truth.....not someone elses.... some days are better than others i am a loony i am ok i am........ |
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04-17-2006, 06:35 AM
| #5 (permalink) |
| ~Author of My Life~  Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't....
Posts: 4,666
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Purrdy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Just wanted to let you know, in case you weren't aware...............  
__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~  |
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04-17-2006, 04:46 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't....
Posts: 4,666
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Yes!!! I got my package today, Purrdy.,,started a thread letting ya know......it came at such a perfect time....had to sign a certified letter from the tax people.......IRS!.and I saw she also had a package in her hand..and Oh! it made my day...thank you soooo much. love the keychain!! It is hooked onto my keys...and am about to go soak in the tub.took the kiddo's on a lil picnic down at the park....now I just want to relax! Stupid me was weeding in my heeled sandals yesterday..yes, go ahead and laugh! LOL..and I twisted my ankle and fell on my already bad knee...it is swollen up and going nuts...dear G*d it never ends does it??? I swear....life is trippy!!! ((((Hugs))))
__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~ |
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04-20-2006, 02:59 AM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,903
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why do i feel so bad? why cant i accept me? for waht and who i am... i have never been good enough never ever ever ever been good enough when am i going to feel better? i feel like my soul has been broken, crushed, i dont want to go out i dont want to see anyone, i swing from major highs to lows...im so messed up i cant do it....life .....HAH! i just wish i was NORMAL....i want to be NORMAL steady, normal and nice...but imnot.... i am not normal...im so different.....i feel so alone so alone....nobody undertands me at all i feel so alone right now this is probably the wrong place to be posting this ..... |
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04-20-2006, 04:10 AM
| #11 (permalink) |
| ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't....
Posts: 4,666
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oh sweetie...............man............I have been where you are..I can tell you that. It took a mixture of medications and cognitive behavioral therapy........challenging my beleif systems.........like you though.I didn't belieev in anything for awhile....was just in pure he$$............. get it out is what I say.....just venting in time can help some........what meds do you take for depression? have you ben checked for bipolar? I was told for many years I was bipolar....then they changed to major depression/panic disorder................... wish me luck today...have to drive on a road I am just not comfortable with to take my mother to the dentist.................I didn't drive for 7 years from sever agoraphobia panic depression....I know the he$$ it brings Purdy...I also know it CAN get better.although telling mE that at the time....oddly pissed me off.............anyone being cheerful pissed me off too! I probably annoy people now! But I love you.and I care.......and I just want to offer you hope via my Experiences and strengths.........luv ya girl.hang in there okay? I know you already are trying so hard.be gentle with yourself........... and YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!! You can't earn your worth............YOU ARE IT ALREADY is my philosophy.. Claim it!!!........it's that whole believe it....you'll see it...........I'll believe it for you til ya can alright? {{{{{{{{warmest hugs}}}}}}}}
__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~ |
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04-20-2006, 06:15 AM
| #13 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,903
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okay FIVE...how do i go about that in the uk??....does it cost money?......Remeber im not earning right now...why coz im crap..they just ousted me right out...did me a MASSIVE favour really...its time to kick back but i dont have the energy right now...im on nelt down...and all ill need now is SR to chuck me off for expressing my opinioin!
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04-20-2006, 09:42 AM
| #15 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,903
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cheers buddy...im on a waiting list at my surgery for...ermm what do they call it?...councelling...will probably have to draw a picture of me in a tree again...sigh...oh well have to keep lloking for things to fix me i guess... thanks for your support hun....coming form the uk i guess you have a better idea of how it is...... |
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04-20-2006, 09:55 AM
| #16 (permalink) |
| ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't....
Posts: 4,666
|
You guys have to wait like forever huh? Man......the whole world needs health reform...........It's pretty bad when ya need help so desperately..and they tel you to make an ppoinment..or go on a waiting list! I used to tell them quite sarcastically."oh not to worry I will SCHEDULE in my crises, my suicial depression...It can wait.why NOT???" Oh it was sooo hard....... I am truly sorry you are going through this pain Purrdy.........
__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~ |
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04-20-2006, 12:02 PM
| #18 (permalink) |
| ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't....
Posts: 4,666
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Ain't that the truth??!! I get threatening calls all the time over medical bills..wanting to come in my house and take 'everything'............good grief! THAT"s gonna make me pay....they told me to get a credit card to pay it up! I said lady! if I could get a credit card I would have credit,which means I have a job........and can work!! LOL.............grrrr!!! To know people suffer and/or die from lack of medical care makes me very very sad,and very very angry......I don't know what to do about it.......
__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~ |
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