Can I ask a favour? - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

equus · 02-23-2006, 10:00 AM

Something very near and dear to my heart. One of my most precious friends has rang me today - it's been a long time since we've spoken because he lost his phone and had no money to dial international.

He's a Sri Lankan working in Italy, waiting and hoping for the umpteenth time for his papers to come through. He's also a good and gentle man with one of the warmest hearts I've ever known. He misses home so much, he's still happy he can talk to his Grandson and family sometimes on the phone - especially his now 2yr old grandson - he's grateful but he's sad.

He says no-one smiles at him in Italy, he misses the smiles of home, he says he needs to laugh, and smile but no-one smiles there.

So this is the favour - would you make an extra effort to smile at immigrants, an extra effort for people thousands of miles away from loved ones?

Chinthaka is a tall very black Asian, his colour never blends and he knows it but if by chance you ever smiled at someone like him his whole face would light up in return. His heart would smile back. He's the wisest man I've ever met. He's the one who told me strong words are when your heart and mouth speak with one language - not two like a politician.

**cece1960** · 02-23-2006, 10:05 AM

You got it Equus.
Thanks for reminding me that I can make a difference in someone else's world.
Cece

OVERIT · 02-23-2006, 10:08 AM

I always do and I always will. In special honor of your friend.

Love and hugs,

Ang

equus · 02-23-2006, 10:14 AM

Can you imagine if this thread got really long how many people far away from home would get an extra warm smile??

Thank you BOTH SO MUCH!!!

OVERIT · 02-23-2006, 10:18 AM

We can do that!

xoxoxo

Ang

**Phinneas** · 02-23-2006, 10:20 AM

equus · 02-23-2006, 10:27 AM

I'll put a piccy in of Chinthaka when I get back - but it isn't just for him, it's because I heard someone so far away from home say how it feels not to be smiled at.

AND that is something we can fix for however many people we can!

OVERIT · 02-23-2006, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by equus

I'll put a piccy in of Chinthaka when I get back - but it isn't just for him, it's because I heard someone so far away from home say how it feels not to be smiled at.

AND that is something we can fix for however many people we can!

I totally understand that. I mean I am not away from my home. But I am a very caring and kind person. And I just like to smile at people, hoping they will get something out of it. What can I say? I'm a Southern Girl with a big heart. And ever here, at home, when I smile at people and they don't smile back, it breaks my heart. I just imagine that they have something else on their mind and try to (not always) pray that they will smile the next time.

xoxoxoxoxox

Ang

OVERIT · 02-23-2006, 10:53 AM

Keep smiling, keep smiling, keep smiling, keep right on smiling

I know sometimes your whole world seems blue

Seems like the whole weight of the world is resting on you

But remember when you hang your head, it’s hard to see the sun

There’s a brighter day, yes it is, just ask and I sure will come

But you’ve got to keep (keep smiling) well, ooh, yeah

(keep smiling) keep on, keep on, keep on, keep on

(keep smiling) ooh, ha (don’t you ever stop smiling)

Oh, don’t you ever stop, no, no, no, oh, when you’ve got to keep on stepping on

You know that you’ve got to be strong and understand the facts of life

You won’t get no place until you make some sacrifice

Try to make it a little easy when you’re doing it on your own

Once you think you’ve got everything, the next day it’s all gone

But you got to keep (keep smiling), well, well, well, well (keep smiling)

Oh I know it’s hard, I know it’s hard, but you’ve to keep (keep smiling), oh---

(don’t you ever stop smiling) yeah, yeah---, oh-----, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh---

Yeah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, (keep smiling) keep a grin on your face yaul

Keep on stepping now, (keep smiling) oh, keep your head up to the sky

(keep smiling) oh-got to notice on the tip of your eyes, (keep smiling)

You’ve got to keep on, keep on, keep on, (keep smiling)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, (keep smiling), ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha---

(keep smiling) oh--keep on (don’t you ever stop smiling) smile, smile---

(keep smiling)

PlanoTexican · 02-23-2006, 10:54 AM

This is something that I need to work on. Not just to foreigners, but to everyone

I should not need this reminder as I live in Texas where everyone has a smile. I do need to adopt this behavior and I will.

If I can get this to be a new habit it can be another wonderful benefit to recovery. One short year ago I would not have even considered it.

Thanks for the reminder!

OVERIT · 02-23-2006, 11:02 AM

Good for you PlanoTexan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xoxoxo

Ang

susane1408 · 02-23-2006, 11:18 AM

I smile at every-one

When I do it from now on I'll give a thought for you and your friend

equus · 02-23-2006, 11:41 AM

Thank you all again... I love the thought of a globally smiley day - especially to folk who tend to get less of them!

This is Chinthaka in Sri Lanka - I don't think he's designed to live without smiles!!

cwohio · 02-23-2006, 11:47 AM

why eq - his face was just MADE for his smile!!!!

everytime i smile now i will think of your post echoing in my mind. thank you!

next time you speak with him ask him if he is feeling all the smiles beaming at him from our little home here!

equus · 02-23-2006, 11:59 AM

He'll LOVE the thought of random people being smiled at all round the globe!!!

His nickname is 'Laughing Buddha' but his friend told me it wasn't for the belly or the smile, it's because he's always helping. And yep - that's what I saw, a man who would risk tourist roth to ask maybe they give the tea pickers a few rupees for taking their pictures. The tea pickers are paid 1$ a day and bury their dead by the road, but he could still be in trouble asking westerners to offer a little when they take pictures. He's paid for roofs on houses and heaven knows how many school books in his country.

As if that wasn't enough he had (without any western literacy) begun to believe depression was a sickness, and as his country has one of the highest suicide rates he didn't just leave it there. He calls it sickness of the sad (with a gesture of his hand down his face). He had decided it needed to be treated but doctors there don't so he did. He's make a rota amongst friends so that while he was giving tours whoever was sick with the sad got a visit from a friend every day. He told the helpers to listen, laugh and to make sure they took them somewhere for a walk (because if it's sickness walking is good for the body!). When he told me this I was gobsmacked and could tell him he was right that it is a sickness. He asked me to tell him how to treat it better but even after looking again when I came home I don't think his system could be beaten with what they had. I think he was already saving lives.

He's definately a hero of mine - a truly remarkable man, any smile I ever gave in his direction has been returned 10,000 over.

Purrdy · 02-23-2006, 02:31 PM

Fabulous Equus! many peopl have told me I can light up a room with my smile in AA. I have always to made the effort to smile at anyone and normally they smile back or you see a glimmer of a smile there...Many people are worried about the message they send out when they smile at strangers but me I love to see the reaction.. We find it so easy to smile at a child or baby and have you noticed they emulate your smile they smile right back (well most do!!) Well it works 99% of the time with adults too. A smile is catching a smile is saying it all without words....

Your friend sounds fabulous and your thread is fabulous too it has reminded me to keep smiling!

Love to you and yours Eq and everyone who is smiling right now!

Purrdyxxx

gelfling · 02-23-2006, 04:00 PM

I will think a big bright smile to your friend. Foreigners are far and few between where I live. So, for Chinthaka, your wonderous smiling friend, I am sending a happy, positive smile to him.

equus · 02-23-2006, 04:03 PM

The rarer they are where you live the more they need the smile - so you'll just have to save it up till it's needed!!

02-23-2006, 10:00 AM	#1 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	Can I ask a favour? Something very near and dear to my heart. One of my most precious friends has rang me today - it's been a long time since we've spoken because he lost his phone and had no money to dial international. He's a Sri Lankan working in Italy, waiting and hoping for the umpteenth time for his papers to come through. He's also a good and gentle man with one of the warmest hearts I've ever known. He misses home so much, he's still happy he can talk to his Grandson and family sometimes on the phone - especially his now 2yr old grandson - he's grateful but he's sad. He says no-one smiles at him in Italy, he misses the smiles of home, he says he needs to laugh, and smile but no-one smiles there. So this is the favour - would you make an extra effort to smile at immigrants, an extra effort for people thousands of miles away from loved ones? Chinthaka is a tall very black Asian, his colour never blends and he knows it but if by chance you ever smiled at someone like him his whole face would light up in return. His heart would smile back. He's the wisest man I've ever met. He's the one who told me strong words are when your heart and mouth speak with one language - not two like a politician.

02-23-2006, 10:05 AM	#2 (permalink)
cece1960 Forum Leader Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: PA Posts: 1,232	You got it Equus. Thanks for reminding me that I can make a difference in someone else's world. Cece __________________ The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are going. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

02-23-2006, 10:20 AM	#6 (permalink)
Phinneas Forum Leader Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: fumbling towards ecstasy Posts: 2,597	Count me in!! __________________ “The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” ~Marianne Williamson

02-23-2006, 10:54 AM	#10 (permalink)
PlanoTexican Support our Troops. Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Republic Of Texas Posts: 453	This is something that I need to work on. Not just to foreigners, but to everyone I should not need this reminder as I live in Texas where everyone has a smile. I do need to adopt this behavior and I will. If I can get this to be a new habit it can be another wonderful benefit to recovery. One short year ago I would not have even considered it. Thanks for the reminder! __________________ Doing the right thing, when no one else is looking. -Bob Hook 'em 'Horns

02-23-2006, 11:18 AM	#12 (permalink)
susane1408 * Join Date: May 2005 Location: Lincolnshire, England Posts: 461	I smile at every-one When I do it from now on I'll give a thought for you and your friend __________________ "All we have to do is to decide what to do with the time that is given to us"....................JRR Tolkien

02-23-2006, 10:08 AM	#3 (permalink)
OVERIT Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Good Ole' Rocky Top! Posts: 3,541	I always do and I always will. In special honor of your friend. Love and hugs, Ang

02-23-2006, 10:14 AM	#4 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	Can you imagine if this thread got really long how many people far away from home would get an extra warm smile?? Thank you BOTH SO MUCH!!!

02-23-2006, 10:18 AM	#5 (permalink)
OVERIT Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Good Ole' Rocky Top! Posts: 3,541	We can do that! xoxoxo Ang

02-23-2006, 10:27 AM	#7 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	I'll put a piccy in of Chinthaka when I get back - but it isn't just for him, it's because I heard someone so far away from home say how it feels not to be smiled at. AND that is something we can fix for however many people we can!

02-23-2006, 10:53 AM	#9 (permalink)
OVERIT Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Good Ole' Rocky Top! Posts: 3,541	Keep smiling, keep smiling, keep smiling, keep right on smiling I know sometimes your whole world seems blue Seems like the whole weight of the world is resting on you But remember when you hang your head, it’s hard to see the sun There’s a brighter day, yes it is, just ask and I sure will come But you’ve got to keep (keep smiling) well, ooh, yeah (keep smiling) keep on, keep on, keep on, keep on (keep smiling) ooh, ha (don’t you ever stop smiling) Oh, don’t you ever stop, no, no, no, oh, when you’ve got to keep on stepping on You know that you’ve got to be strong and understand the facts of life You won’t get no place until you make some sacrifice Try to make it a little easy when you’re doing it on your own Once you think you’ve got everything, the next day it’s all gone But you got to keep (keep smiling), well, well, well, well (keep smiling) Oh I know it’s hard, I know it’s hard, but you’ve to keep (keep smiling), oh--- (don’t you ever stop smiling) yeah, yeah---, oh-----, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh--- Yeah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, (keep smiling) keep a grin on your face yaul Keep on stepping now, (keep smiling) oh, keep your head up to the sky (keep smiling) oh-got to notice on the tip of your eyes, (keep smiling) You’ve got to keep on, keep on, keep on, (keep smiling) Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, (keep smiling), ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha--- (keep smiling) oh--keep on (don’t you ever stop smiling) smile, smile--- (keep smiling)

02-23-2006, 11:02 AM	#11 (permalink)
OVERIT Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Good Ole' Rocky Top! Posts: 3,541	Good for you PlanoTexan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xoxoxo Ang

02-23-2006, 11:41 AM	#13 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	Thank you all again... I love the thought of a globally smiley day - especially to folk who tend to get less of them! This is Chinthaka in Sri Lanka - I don't think he's designed to live without smiles!!

02-23-2006, 11:47 AM	#14 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,141	why eq - his face was just MADE for his smile!!!! everytime i smile now i will think of your post echoing in my mind. thank you! next time you speak with him ask him if he is feeling all the smiles beaming at him from our little home here! __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

02-23-2006, 11:59 AM	#15 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	He'll LOVE the thought of random people being smiled at all round the globe!!! His nickname is 'Laughing Buddha' but his friend told me it wasn't for the belly or the smile, it's because he's always helping. And yep - that's what I saw, a man who would risk tourist roth to ask maybe they give the tea pickers a few rupees for taking their pictures. The tea pickers are paid 1$ a day and bury their dead by the road, but he could still be in trouble asking westerners to offer a little when they take pictures. He's paid for roofs on houses and heaven knows how many school books in his country. As if that wasn't enough he had (without any western literacy) begun to believe depression was a sickness, and as his country has one of the highest suicide rates he didn't just leave it there. He calls it sickness of the sad (with a gesture of his hand down his face). He had decided it needed to be treated but doctors there don't so he did. He's make a rota amongst friends so that while he was giving tours whoever was sick with the sad got a visit from a friend every day. He told the helpers to listen, laugh and to make sure they took them somewhere for a walk (because if it's sickness walking is good for the body!). When he told me this I was gobsmacked and could tell him he was right that it is a sickness. He asked me to tell him how to treat it better but even after looking again when I came home I don't think his system could be beaten with what they had. I think he was already saving lives. He's definately a hero of mine - a truly remarkable man, any smile I ever gave in his direction has been returned 10,000 over.

02-23-2006, 02:31 PM	#16 (permalink)
Purrdy Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Salisbury Wiltshire Posts: 1,903	Fabulous Equus! many peopl have told me I can light up a room with my smile in AA. I have always to made the effort to smile at anyone and normally they smile back or you see a glimmer of a smile there...Many people are worried about the message they send out when they smile at strangers but me I love to see the reaction.. We find it so easy to smile at a child or baby and have you noticed they emulate your smile they smile right back (well most do!!) Well it works 99% of the time with adults too. A smile is catching a smile is saying it all without words.... Your friend sounds fabulous and your thread is fabulous too it has reminded me to keep smiling! Love to you and yours Eq and everyone who is smiling right now! Purrdyxxx

02-23-2006, 04:03 PM	#18 (permalink)
equus Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: uk Posts: 3,056	The rarer they are where you live the more they need the smile - so you'll just have to save it up till it's needed!!

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