Advice please

[indigo]

Hi everyone I'm putting my problem on this forum so maybe some of the men here can tell me what they think too, I'll appreciate any input, ok here goes. As most of you will know I am a lesbian who has been in a relationship with my partner for 21 years. All four of our children are straight (for all that matters) My oldest son ,father of my grandaughter has been dumped by his last two girlfriends because their parents didn't approve of gays. We have brought our children up to be considerate loving human beings and are proud of this, we have been complimented by staight people on what a great job we've done.
I can't see how our sexuality has anything to do with our son's relationships, this last time he is heartbroken he is 29 years old and though I say it myself he's respectful and kind.
Please my partner and I feel so bad about this and don't know what we can do. Any advice would be welcomed thanks for hearing me out.We are great believers in family values and are respected in our town by almost everyone and play a big part in our community.

hugs indie

Hmmm. Sexual orientation of one's parents shouldn't be a consideration by anyone for any reason whatsoever. That's nobody's business. It's your choice, not theirs. Anyone who places a value judgment about how your traditional values may be affected by sexual preference is pure bullsh!t. People need to go back to school if that's their mode of thinking. The "moral majority" has been notoriously renowned for being unaccepting of non-traditional sexual roles. I'm not saying everyone in that social sector is the same, and maybe that's a stereotype too.

Narrow mindedness is bad juju. Very bad karma.

Just my 2¢e

[OVERIT]

(((((Indigo)))))))))

I am sorry to say that I have no words of wisdom to give to you, but that I am thinking about you and praying for you.

xoxoxo

Ang

[milla]

Hey Indie, I am so sorry your son is going through pain ... and you guys as well. The only thing I ask myself is, if his girlfriends parents are that intolerant and can't see the joy of love in any shape or form, then maybe they shouldn't be a ppart of YOUR family.

Intolerance on any level is ...well, intolerable

Sounds like you guys have a home full of love and good things and you should be proud of that and not beat yourselves up about other people's ignorance and negativity. I am sorry that this is hurting your son but I am sure that even in the back of his mind he must know on some level that if his girlfriend is willing to leave him for this reason maybe she wasn't the right loving person to begin with.

Anyway, I hope thats not too harsh... I am a full believer in love and whatever form that love takes and if that love can build a solid family, that is all that matters.
xoxoxlots of hugs and good thoughts your way
Milla

[cwohio]

indie - let me get this - the parents of the girlfriends disapproved so they dumped your son? sounds like even tho he's heart-broken, that if these grown adult girls are allowing their parents intolence to dictate theirs lives, then he's better off without them. i pray that the right person will come into his life - one that embraces humans period!

[CAPTAINZING2000]

Annie,

this is so sad. My ex lived with a woman for years after we were divorced and my kids were teased a lot on this account.

I pray your son can find a woman that' parent's aren't bigots.

I'll always love you for who you are. Thanks for being my friend


Chris

[PaperDolls]

Indigo

Well.........I hate to see this type of thing. My gf and I have been together for almost 8 years and have spoke of having children. We're both scared, not only to be first time parents (we would be kick a** parents by the way but for all of the intolerance that would probably follow.

All I can say is, it sounds like your son is a great person. I really feel like that if his wife really loved him, it wouldn't have mattered that his parents are gay, no matter what her parents thought. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is be a good listener. Sometimes you just can't fix things........just be there for him and listen. I'm sure he will eventually find someone that loves HIM for him.

Keep being strong.

~doll

Edit: I just have to say this.........Screw all of those people in this world that hate me because of who I love, screw them.

[Cecilia]

Originally Posted by indigo

Hi everyone I'm putting my problem on this forum so maybe some of the men here can tell me what they think too, I'll appreciate any input, ok here goes. As most of you will know I am a lesbian who has been in a relationship with my partner for 21 years. All four of our children are straight (for all that matters) My oldest son ,father of my grandaughter has been dumped by his last two girlfriends because their parents didn't approve of gays. We have brought our children up to be considerate loving human beings and are proud of this, we have been complimented by staight people on what a great job we've done.
I can't see how our sexuality has anything to do with our son's relationships, this last time he is heartbroken he is 29 years old and though I say it myself he's respectful and kind.
Please my partner and I feel so bad about this and don't know what we can do. Any advice would be welcomed thanks for hearing me out.We are great believers in family values and are respected in our town by almost everyone and play a big part in our community.

hugs indie

Im sorry I dont have any words of wisdom for ya. All I can say is I think its a crock the way these people are treating you and your son. . I dont know why people get their knickers in a twist over gay relationships. I mean its not like youre forcing us to be in one.

Youve been together 21 years etc. Heck if you were straight youd be a pillar of the community. I would think that parents would want their daughters to marry someone who came from a home like yours. I say good riddance to that broad. If she bailed that easily then she probaly felt the same way herself and it was just a matter of time until her true colors emerged.

Not sure if I can say this right. But I think your son has advantages over other men. Im sure he sees women more as equals and values their opinions more. He probably makes a very good friend. All guys want to have sex with you but its rare to find one who will listen to you. He also probably doesnt mind doing his share of the cooking and cleaning. I would think this would make him VERY desirable to women. Does he like older women? Just kidding. Elvis would break out of the pokey and smack all of us. LOL

Seriously. Maybe hes looking in the wrong places. For example if you dont want to date someone who drinks then you shouldnt look for a date in a bar.


I suppose those girls parents wouldnt care if one of you was an unemployed drunken wife beater who slept around and was into bondage. That would be okay. Just so you were straight. Sorry. Ill get down off my soapbox now.

[indigo]

Thanks everyone I know there's so many good people out there and my son would be a good 'catch' lol as you say he's attentive and helps out with everything. All we want same as any parent is for the happiness of their kids.
hugs indie