My Deepest Apologies - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Chance · 12-09-2005, 09:42 AM

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SR))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))

Oh boy I don't know really where to begin, I have been working my 4th step as you all know and I have gotten into some things that have really made me take a look at how I feel at any given moment. Now mind you I am not good at recognizing my feelings, for I haven't felt for such a long time. I am not going to use that as an excuse here either I am looking at my part and my part only OK>>>

I have to apologize for some of the Threads that I have started here and a huge amount of my reactions. One that pops into my head is "LMMFAO SR Clicks" I think that was the name of it. I want you to know or at least now I know why I started that Thread. I was feeling left out here at SR, I wasn't comfortable with Vic at the time either, I was into self-pity. And I didn't recognize that at the time but today I realize that. I was probably right where I needed to be at that time ( LOL that is so hard to believe ) but I still don't like how I have acted at certain times here at SR.

I have to apologize also for threatening to leave SR a huge amount of time. I was also into self-pity at them times now that I reflect back. I was wrong with the behaviours on a lot of those times and I deeply apologize for them. I am trying my best today to be the best Vic that I can be and I guess that I have to start now.

Love Vic

abtchonamission · 12-09-2005, 09:45 AM

((((((((Vic)))))))))

It's obvious to me that you've come a long way. AND, it's been a while since I've come across a post from you saying that you're leaving SR - so, that's a change you've effected, isn't it? A part of what all of us are here to do is to grow, and IMO, there's a lot of growth going on with you.

Big Hugs,
Trisha

KelKel · 12-09-2005, 10:02 AM

Does this mean you won't be threatening to leave any more?

Good, cause we need you around here.....

Chance · 12-09-2005, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KelKel

Does this mean you won't be threatening to leave any more?

Good, cause we need you around here.....

UMMMM I don't think that I will be atleast not today LOL>>>I have to remember that we have just today and I am doing what I have to do today. When I got sober and clean this last time I said that I would not make promises to me or to anyone else and it has worked so far

Quote:

abtchonamission ((((((((Vic)))))))))

It's obvious to me that you've come a long way. AND, it's been a while since I've come across a post from you saying that you're leaving SR - so, that's a change you've effected, isn't it? A part of what all of us are here to do is to grow, and IMO, there's a lot of growth going on with you.

Big Hugs,
Trisha

Awww thank you, I am trying that is all I know, I really don't see too much growth but I will take your word for it

Love Vic

**Phinneas** · 12-09-2005, 10:37 AM

Vic - your growth has been tremendous. I for one am proud of you. Keep up the good work. (And I do mean WORK - step work and daily readings and service - that's where the growth comes!) You are doing the deed and it shows.

Chance · 12-09-2005, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phinneas

Vic - your growth has been tremendous. I for one am proud of you. Keep up the good work. (And I do mean WORK - step work and daily readings and service - that's where the growth comes!) You are doing the deed and it shows.

Thanks Phinny that means a lot to me......

Ummm I feel hummm how do I feel here let me see, terrible I made a post in the newcomers thread and I went back to delete it because I don't think that it was a proper thing to do but I was too late....Well I will work through this one too...OK thanks gals and I truly mean that....

Love vic

Five · 12-09-2005, 11:45 AM

Vic - your a character mate. I look out for your posts all the time...

Apology excepted although I have no idea what for.

jpeace2 · 12-09-2005, 11:57 AM

It is good that you're able to see your defects, Vic....that's the halfway point to beginning to work on them! As far as anyone here who uses that threatening to leave stuff as a way to express their self pity, I usually don't pay any mind to it. I figure that's their stuff, and either they'll get over it and stay, or they won't and they'll leave.....but everyone's free to be right where they are at any given time, right?

Drama is a huge part of our lives as addicts, whether in active addiction or active recovery. Once we learn that we don't need it, life becomes a lot easier, at least in my humble opinion. I'm happy to see you not giving up the fight to change, Vic--it's a tough one that we all wrestle with. Old behaviors die hard, you know....but the new ones that replace them really do bring with them peace and serenity. I hope you find some in the work you've been doing. Keep the faith.....

Chance · 12-09-2005, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five

Vic - your a character mate. I look out for your posts all the time...

Apology excepted although I have no idea what for.

Well Mill I guess you would have to been here to truly know I am not sure if you were at the times or not but any way I just felt as If I needed to do this since I have been doing my 4th step and a lot of things are coming back to me.

Quote:

jpeace2 It is good that you're able to see your defects, Vic....that's the halfway point to beginning to work on them!

Yep but I don't think that I would have really went looking really deep into myself if I hadn't worked my 4th step. Now I am not even half way through it LOL I might be coming back here again when I get even more clarity.

Thanks everyone.

Love Vic

12-09-2005, 03:49 PM

Apology accepted. Just don't do it again.

Keep Coming Back!!!

Chy · 12-09-2005, 04:01 PM

ahhh Vic finish your fourth before you do your 9th.

Not necessary at all IMO. *hugs*

Chance · 12-09-2005, 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chy

ahhh Vic finish your fourth before you do your 9th.

Not necessary at all IMO. *hugs*

I thought this was a tenth step, that turned out to be a ninth I had it on my 4th but OMG now I might be getting confused LOL

Love Vic

Quote:

Midas Apology accepted. Just don't do it again. Keep Coming Back!!!

OK

shutterbug · 12-10-2005, 01:01 AM

Vic....I'm glad you never left....you've helped me a lot the last 2 days

I almost left several months ago too, but it was because I was being TOO sensative....I need this place and people like you so I've stuck around and there's only one forum I won't be popping my head back into any time soon....lol

You're great I think and i'm glad to have you as a friend.

(but I know what you mean about feeling left out some times....my home forum doesn't have as many regular visitors as many other forums....so it's often few and far between when i get responses from people.....and I'm determined to get a thread turned into a sticky

Hugs

Chance · 12-10-2005, 12:05 PM

I am not any one but just another junkie seeking recovery Just For Today, and that is all I am. I am finding my way through the 12 steps and am pouring my heart and soul into recovery. I am half way through the 4th Step in the NA Step Study Guide and that is in fact showing me who I was and better than that is showing me who I am not today..HOPE that you KCB and I am here if you need someone to talk to...

Love Vic

shutterbug · 12-12-2005, 02:25 PM

What's KCB mean?
Kick ????? butt???

I never made it past the second step in Alanon b/4 my episode hit and I had to start focusing on my mental illness. I was not looking forward to the 4th step though....I can tell you that. Keep up the good work, i know you'll come out on top!

(someday, I plan to make it back to Alanon and the 12 steps)...

12-09-2005, 09:42 AM	#1 (permalink)
Chance JUST DO IT!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Here Or There Posts: 7,097 Blog Entries: 9	My Deepest Apologies (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SR))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))) Oh boy I don't know really where to begin, I have been working my 4th step as you all know and I have gotten into some things that have really made me take a look at how I feel at any given moment. Now mind you I am not good at recognizing my feelings, for I haven't felt for such a long time. I am not going to use that as an excuse here either I am looking at my part and my part only OK>>> I have to apologize for some of the Threads that I have started here and a huge amount of my reactions. One that pops into my head is "LMMFAO SR Clicks" I think that was the name of it. I want you to know or at least now I know why I started that Thread. I was feeling left out here at SR, I wasn't comfortable with Vic at the time either, I was into self-pity. And I didn't recognize that at the time but today I realize that. I was probably right where I needed to be at that time ( LOL that is so hard to believe ) but I still don't like how I have acted at certain times here at SR. I have to apologize also for threatening to leave SR a huge amount of time. I was also into self-pity at them times now that I reflect back. I was wrong with the behaviours on a lot of those times and I deeply apologize for them. I am trying my best today to be the best Vic that I can be and I guess that I have to start now. Love Vic __________________ With Love and Respect Vic Life isn't yesterday or tomorrow it is in the now.....

12-09-2005, 09:45 AM	#2 (permalink)
abtchonamission Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: In the mountain air Posts: 1,349	((((((((Vic))))))))) It's obvious to me that you've come a long way. AND, it's been a while since I've come across a post from you saying that you're leaving SR - so, that's a change you've effected, isn't it? A part of what all of us are here to do is to grow, and IMO, there's a lot of growth going on with you. Big Hugs, Trisha __________________ Faith... When you come to the end of all the light you know and you are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.

12-09-2005, 10:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
Phinneas Forum Leader Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: fumbling towards ecstasy Posts: 2,597	Vic - your growth has been tremendous. I for one am proud of you. Keep up the good work. (And I do mean WORK - step work and daily readings and service - that's where the growth comes!) You are doing the deed and it shows. __________________ “The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” ~Marianne Williamson

12-10-2005, 01:01 AM	#13 (permalink)
shutterbug A picture's worth a 1000 words Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: With any luck, I'm lost in a view finder Posts: 2,942	Vic....I'm glad you never left....you've helped me a lot the last 2 days I almost left several months ago too, but it was because I was being TOO sensative....I need this place and people like you so I've stuck around and there's only one forum I won't be popping my head back into any time soon....lol You're great I think and i'm glad to have you as a friend. (but I know what you mean about feeling left out some times....my home forum doesn't have as many regular visitors as many other forums....so it's often few and far between when i get responses from people.....and I'm determined to get a thread turned into a sticky Hugs __________________ I'M FINE!! Fanatically Insecure Neuratic & Emotional Bipolar/Depression support: 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).

12-10-2005, 12:05 PM	#14 (permalink)
Chance JUST DO IT!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Here Or There Posts: 7,097 Blog Entries: 9	I am not any one but just another junkie seeking recovery Just For Today, and that is all I am. I am finding my way through the 12 steps and am pouring my heart and soul into recovery. I am half way through the 4th Step in the NA Step Study Guide and that is in fact showing me who I was and better than that is showing me who I am not today..HOPE that you KCB and I am here if you need someone to talk to... Love Vic __________________ With Love and Respect Vic Life isn't yesterday or tomorrow it is in the now.....

12-09-2005, 10:02 AM	#3 (permalink)
KelKel Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: The Mohave Desert Posts: 2,313	Does this mean you won't be threatening to leave any more? Good, cause we need you around here.....

12-09-2005, 11:45 AM	#7 (permalink)
Five Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: London Posts: 1,232	Vic - your a character mate. I look out for your posts all the time... Apology excepted although I have no idea what for.

12-09-2005, 11:57 AM	#8 (permalink)
jpeace2 Stronger every day! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: PA Posts: 181	It is good that you're able to see your defects, Vic....that's the halfway point to beginning to work on them! As far as anyone here who uses that threatening to leave stuff as a way to express their self pity, I usually don't pay any mind to it. I figure that's their stuff, and either they'll get over it and stay, or they won't and they'll leave.....but everyone's free to be right where they are at any given time, right? Drama is a huge part of our lives as addicts, whether in active addiction or active recovery. Once we learn that we don't need it, life becomes a lot easier, at least in my humble opinion. I'm happy to see you not giving up the fight to change, Vic--it's a tough one that we all wrestle with. Old behaviors die hard, you know....but the new ones that replace them really do bring with them peace and serenity. I hope you find some in the work you've been doing. Keep the faith.....

12-09-2005, 03:49 PM	#10 (permalink)
Midas Guest Posts: n/a	Apology accepted. Just don't do it again. Keep Coming Back!!!

12-09-2005, 04:01 PM	#11 (permalink)
Chy Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: El Paso, Tx Posts: 5,886	ahhh Vic finish your fourth before you do your 9th. Not necessary at all IMO. hugs

12-12-2005, 02:25 PM	#15 (permalink)
shutterbug A picture's worth a 1000 words Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: With any luck, I'm lost in a view finder Posts: 2,942	What's KCB mean? Kick ????? butt??? I never made it past the second step in Alanon b/4 my episode hit and I had to start focusing on my mental illness. I was not looking forward to the 4th step though....I can tell you that. Keep up the good work, i know you'll come out on top! (someday, I plan to make it back to Alanon and the 12 steps)... __________________ I'M FINE!! Fanatically Insecure Neuratic & Emotional Bipolar/Depression support: 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).

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