Could Someone Help Me - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Chance · 12-08-2005, 05:18 PM

OK I have this question but I don't really understand what it is asking me LOL I need it broke down to stupid terms OK....

"How has my inability or unwillingness to experience certain feelings led me to develop resentments?

Thanks

Love Vic

KelKel · 12-08-2005, 05:26 PM

I'll Get Back To You...

lulu70 · 12-08-2005, 05:31 PM

That's a tough one, Vic. I'm trying to think of an example.........

I think it's like, because I was afraid to feel the hurt of a particularly painful break-up, I stayed in the anger phase, instead of moving on in the process of healing. I pretty much held on to the anger--at him and at myself--as a means of protecting myself from really mourning the relationship.

Does that make any sense? I could be way off base, but that is the way I would interpret that question.

splendra · 12-08-2005, 08:07 PM

Welll (((Vic)))

Let's say someone tells you a lie and you find out that you have been believing this lie for quite some time and the person who told you this lie is someone you really care about and when you find out the truth you decide to just say aw he!! just forget about it but, way down deep inside you feel pretty pi$$ed off but you decide for the sake of peace not to let your anger show.

In reality you are angry but you are adamant that you would rather forget it. Little things start bothering you about this person cause you really don't trust them anymore cause they lied to you so you start relating everything they do to this lie that they told you and pretty soon you have a giant resentment against this person because you did not say to them at the time that you found out about the lie that you were hurt and angry because you did not want to feel it and maybe you were afraid that if you told them you were angry that it might somehow make you loose the relationship so, instead you act like you are not angry when you really are.

What you may not realize though is if you had said right when you found out about it that you were angry and felt the anger and discussed with the person why they felt like they had to lie to you instead of just teling you the truth you might actually be closer but instead you are being just as dishonest as they were and you resent the heck out of them cause maybe in your mind you now trust yourself less because you lied to yourself and said that you were not angry...

Chy · 12-08-2005, 08:17 PM

When experiencing deep emotions like fear, anger, sadness, lonliness you kept it bottled up fermenting inside, not letting it out, confronting, speaking out, and as a result of those feelings you started to take it out on others, you resented in others what you saw in yourself but were unwilling to own up to. Sorta like a woman pmsin'g....we know what's causing it we know where the rage, tears, anger, giddiness is coming from but we sure as hell won't say so! *LOL*

...now where's that damn chocolate?????

Sorry Vic, but it's all your fault you know, you made me do it, and I don't like you for it! .....get my point? Understand it now?

Dan · 12-08-2005, 08:20 PM

Getting loaded to not feel my emotions cheated me out of a life.
If resentments are all I have to deal with in regards to that, I consider that to be a blessing.
Others like me ended up killing others or themselves.

Chance · 12-08-2005, 08:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chy

Sorry Vic, but it's all your fault you know, you made me do it, and I don't like you for it! .....get my point? Understand it now?

Yep I sure do and I thought that I made an apology for that already I guess some people never get over it huh...

Love Vic

OK everyone thanks now here is the next question that I am having trouble with LOL>>>

Who pissed in your corn flake today...LOL>>>>>OK PMS

OMG I need to keep coming back....really though I thank all of you for your replies and I made it through my resentment list now I have to do feelings YULKKKKKKKKKK

Chy · 12-08-2005, 10:10 PM

Yayy!! Lesson 2: Feelings- just spill them from your heart Vic. *hugs*

Chance · 12-09-2005, 12:00 AM

I am Chy...I think that I have worked hard enough for today on them I am going to bed, I have tomorrow and afew more days LOL...

Love Vic

12-08-2005, 05:18 PM	#1 (permalink)
Chance JUST DO IT!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Here Or There Posts: 7,090 Blog Entries: 9	Could Someone Help Me OK I have this question but I don't really understand what it is asking me LOL I need it broke down to stupid terms OK.... "How has my inability or unwillingness to experience certain feelings led me to develop resentments? Thanks Love Vic __________________ With Love and Respect Vic Life isn't yesterday or tomorrow it is in the now.....

12-08-2005, 05:31 PM	#3 (permalink)
lulu70 We all need each other. Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: The road of happy destiny. Posts: 2,223	That's a tough one, Vic. I'm trying to think of an example......... I think it's like, because I was afraid to feel the hurt of a particularly painful break-up, I stayed in the anger phase, instead of moving on in the process of healing. I pretty much held on to the anger--at him and at myself--as a means of protecting myself from really mourning the relationship. Does that make any sense? I could be way off base, but that is the way I would interpret that question. __________________ "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.....do the thing you think you cannot do." ~Eleanor Roosevelt

12-08-2005, 08:07 PM	#4 (permalink)
splendra the girl can't help it Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: splendraville Posts: 4,771 Blog Entries: 3	Welll (((Vic))) Let's say someone tells you a lie and you find out that you have been believing this lie for quite some time and the person who told you this lie is someone you really care about and when you find out the truth you decide to just say aw he!! just forget about it but, way down deep inside you feel pretty pi$$ed off but you decide for the sake of peace not to let your anger show. In reality you are angry but you are adamant that you would rather forget it. Little things start bothering you about this person cause you really don't trust them anymore cause they lied to you so you start relating everything they do to this lie that they told you and pretty soon you have a giant resentment against this person because you did not say to them at the time that you found out about the lie that you were hurt and angry because you did not want to feel it and maybe you were afraid that if you told them you were angry that it might somehow make you loose the relationship so, instead you act like you are not angry when you really are. What you may not realize though is if you had said right when you found out about it that you were angry and felt the anger and discussed with the person why they felt like they had to lie to you instead of just teling you the truth you might actually be closer but instead you are being just as dishonest as they were and you resent the heck out of them cause maybe in your mind you now trust yourself less because you lied to yourself and said that you were not angry... __________________ nice has a hisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

12-09-2005, 12:00 AM	#9 (permalink)
Chance JUST DO IT!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Here Or There Posts: 7,090 Blog Entries: 9	I am Chy...I think that I have worked hard enough for today on them I am going to bed, I have tomorrow and afew more days LOL... Love Vic __________________ With Love and Respect Vic Life isn't yesterday or tomorrow it is in the now.....

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12-08-2005, 05:26 PM	#2 (permalink)
KelKel Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: The Mohave Desert Posts: 2,313	I'll Get Back To You...

12-08-2005, 08:17 PM	#5 (permalink)
Chy Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: El Paso, Tx Posts: 5,886	When experiencing deep emotions like fear, anger, sadness, lonliness you kept it bottled up fermenting inside, not letting it out, confronting, speaking out, and as a result of those feelings you started to take it out on others, you resented in others what you saw in yourself but were unwilling to own up to. Sorta like a woman pmsin'g....we know what's causing it we know where the rage, tears, anger, giddiness is coming from but we sure as hell won't say so! LOL ...now where's that damn chocolate????? Sorry Vic, but it's all your fault you know, you made me do it, and I don't like you for it! .....get my point? Understand it now?

12-08-2005, 08:20 PM	#6 (permalink)
Dan Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 8,753	Getting loaded to not feel my emotions cheated me out of a life. If resentments are all I have to deal with in regards to that, I consider that to be a blessing. Others like me ended up killing others or themselves.

12-08-2005, 10:10 PM	#8 (permalink)
Chy Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: El Paso, Tx Posts: 5,886	Yayy!! Lesson 2: Feelings- just spill them from your heart Vic. hugs

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