Rules That Guys Wished Girls Knew

[WLDKATZ]

Rules That Guys Wished Girls Knew.......

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.

Don't cut your hair. Ever.

Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present!

If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

Sometimes he's not thinking about you. Live with it.

Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and monster trucks.

Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.
Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.

Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

Shopping is not a sport.

Anything you wear is fine. Really.

You have enough clothes.

You have too many shoes.

Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.

Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot, and your dad's way past idiot.

Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

Pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes - what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.

Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

CHECK YOUR OIL!

Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.

Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.

Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.

If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

If something we said can be interpreted makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.

Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - but not both.

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

Women wearing Wonder-bras and low-cut blouses, lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

Consider golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.

Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty, and it's certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.

The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.

[Astro]

Well, I'm glad you set that straight for us Pammy.

:slap:

Ouch! OK, I deserved that.

[ccgirl]

How about no talking after sex? They sure do like their beauty sleep after the deed is done!

[PeachyClean]

How about no talking after sex? They sure do like their beauty sleep after the deed is done!

Me too most times... lol

[best]

Originally Posted by ccgirl

How about no talking after sex? They sure do like their beauty sleep after the deed is done!

That is because of all the begging and pleading we need do before hand...we are just worn out from talking *LOL*

[cookconfay]

[WLDKATZ]

Originally Posted by best

That is because of all the begging and pleading we need do before hand...we are just worn out from talking *LOL*

Thanks that made me laugh until I almost cried...........lol

[Ann]

Originally Posted by WLDKATZ

Thanks that made me laugh until I almost cried...........lol

And made me cry until I almost laughed

[indigo]

What a hoot!!!!!

[WLDKATZ]

haven't updated this one in awhile been working on it though.........lol

Asking a girl on Friday for a date on Saturday is completely unacceptable. Keyword: Planning
Shave every day. One day's growth of facial hair is worse than a girl not shaving her legs for a week.
We may be emotional beings, but do not lie to squirm your way out of trouble. We are not as gullible as you think.
Learn to clean up the toilet. If peeing standing up is so difficult and you are bound to miss, then may we suggest that you learn to use a toilet brush and sponge to clean up after yourself.
We really don't find it attractive when you stand there scratching yourself in the morning, afternoon or night- please do it in private.

Don't do it, if you're not going to follow-thru. A woman would rather not have sex at all, than to have it and miss the climax by a mile because you weren't up for the challenge.
Don't fix it if it's really not broke. You don't need to take everything apart out of curiosity.
Ask for directions
If you said you are going to be somewhere at a certain time, then do it. Don't expect us to wait around.
Professional Wrestling and Soap Opera's are the same story lines, just different costumes. So don't make fun of us for being hooked on Y&R when you are hooked on WWF.

"I don't feel like talking right now" is an acceptable thing to say- Unacceptable thing to do is sit there and pretend you're listening and just say "uh huh" and "yes Dear"- it's condescending.
Get rid of your holey underwear.
If you can ogle so can we!
One remote is ENOUGH... no need to have a control tower in your living room.
Couch Potato is not a sport, so don't try to be an All-star at it!

Your way is not always the right way. Learn to say- "I was wrong"
If we can't talk to you during a football game, then don't try to get our attention during Ally McBeal.
If you say you are going to do something, then just do it. Don't sit around thinking of creative excuses why you couldn't get to it.
We are not your mothers, so don't expect us to clean up after you like one.
SkyLine Chili is not considered a romantic dinner for two.

We have other friends of the male gender, so leave your jealousy at the door!
If you concede to let us decorate the house without any input from you, then don't complain when everything is in frilly flowers, and pink motif.
When wearing a dress shirt, wear an undershirt underneath. Nothing worse than seeing a man's hairy chest and nipples through his shirt. (PINK PINK PINK)
Hey, we CAN be friends with our ex's- so deal with it!
We understand that you have to put on a manly act in front of your friends, but in the privacy of your own home, it's okay if you just want to cuddle.

[Astro]

Originally Posted by WLDKATZ

SkyLine Chili is not considered a romantic dinner for two.

Well, there goes my whole menu for dinner dates at my house!

[WLDKATZ]

50 things girls wish guys knew....


1)You have to tell a girl how you feel about her...we make no assumptions.
2)It never hurts to work out...take your own advice.
3)Girls like sex just as much, if not more than guys.
4)Not all girls masturbate...we just don't and no we are not lying.
5)We hate porn.
6)Hmmmm...guys in Jeeps...yummmm...
7)Girls need food, water, and compliments to survive.
8)We think about you all the time.
9)Being able to make us laugh is so much more important than how much you can bench-press.
10)We may think you are gay if you wear tighty-whities on a regular basis.
11)Hold our hand.
12)No backseat drivers...NONE.
13)Girls generally don't like giving head, so you better be ready to reciprocate if and when you get it.
14)We are not your all-night restaurant.
15)Anything we say or do during that 4 days to a week each month cannot be held against us.
16)If you hold our hand while you are driving we will be thoroughly impressed...especially if it's a stick.
17)Under no circumstances will we have a threesome.
18)You look hot in hooded articles of clothing.
19)If you think for any reason that we don't like you then we probably don't.
20)Having us over while you and your friends play video games does not count as "quality time".
21)Just because we groom ourselves on a regular basis does not mean we're high maintanance.
22)Never comment on how much a girl eats...ever.
23)Keep in mind that we withold sex when we're mad at you, so you might wanna get around to apologizing...
24)You just can't force us to like sports...especially those associated with the WWF.
25)We're typically smarter than you...so get over it and stop whining when we get better grades than you.
26)If you do not own a wife-beater, stop reading this list, and go invest in one...right now.
27)The ability to play the guitar will help you get laid.
28)We're sorry, Brad Pitt just IS hot...get over it!!!
29)Walks in the rain, kisses on the forehead, and cooking dinner for us will get you everywhere.
30)Just because we're in a serious relationship doesn't mean we plan to marry you someday, so stop being so damn scared!!!
31)If you're developing such good finger skills playing video games, you better put them to good use sometimes.
32)Anything you do or say to another girl that you wouldn't want us to know about is considered cheating.
33)If we can admit that we're wrong, you'd better be able to do the same.
34)The excuse "I can't dance" is unacceptable...we'll appreciate the simple fact that you're trying.
35)On that note, if you refuse to dance, expect us to dance with other guys...and lots of them.
36)Think before you speak...it'll make a world of difference.
37)Not all girls kiss on the first date, get over it...we're creatures of mystery.
38)Make fun of our clothes...prepare to die.
39)We don't always expect you to pay for us, but it doesn't hurt to at least offer everyone once in a while.
40)Tell us we're beautiful.
41)The "little things" in a relationship are really the biggest.
42)Foreplay isn't something we should have to ask for...it's a prerequisite.
43)Don't screw us over...especially if we have an older brother or protective guy friends...they will hunt you down and kill you.
44)If you're gonna look at other girls, at least make sure we don't see you do it.
45)Just because we're still just "hanging out" doesn't make it ok to sleep with your ex-girlfriend, friend with benefits, etc.
46)No girl just wants to be your "friend with benefits".
47)We're sensitive too...be gentle (and we're not talking about our hearts here guys).
48)One word when it comes to smoking...quit.
49)We reserve the right to hate all of your ex-girlfriends.
50)If we happen to trip, fall, etc, while wearing the exceptionally high shoes that we love, go ahead and laugh...we will be...that is unless we hurt ourselves...



LOL
can you tell this came from a pre adult girl??????????????
LOL
thank you sweetheart Aunt Pamm Posted your find.....LOL

[Astro]

Ya always have to be right, don't ya Pam? Huh?

[WLDKATZ]

lol.............no....................

[ccgirl]

Katz, my husband must be weird. I told him last night I was going to get my hair done (I like to keep it it's natural shade of no grays every six weeks, lol) and he said, are you going to get it cut? It's down to my shoulders now and he loves it short, like pixie short! Most guys would never have a woman cut it. Go figure. I think I look like a lollipop when its short.

[WLDKATZ]

lol
My hair was pulled last night by my small nephew and I made the statement I was going to cut off my hair, dad and 2 of my brothers were there and practically screamed, It is now past my waist and long and thick....my one sister in law slapped the back of my head and told me to quit being stupid...........lol
Mind you that it took me going threw chemo and radation 4 times before it fell out, it used to drag the floor!!!!
But it isn't until you have really long hair that you realize that people see it as a challange, I have had bald men ask what I am doing to grow mine.............lol

[ccgirl]

Wow, congratulations on well, your health I guess. And you're pregnant too. What a strong woman you are.



P.S. As far as hair goes the only thing I don't like is when you see a like, 60 year old woman (unless it's Jane Seymour) with really long hair. At some point you've gotta let go, lol


As far as the topic goes, my husband always says he wishes I would realize that he can't read my mind, so if I don't tell him what I want, he can't help!

[WLDKATZ]

I know I saw this one lady at my church get baptized it was funny as all get out she had this huge beehive going on it came down Poor Paster Elsworth about died he was trying to get both of them untangled from it she was 50 something and had NEVER cut it a day in her life!!!!

[ccgirl]

Yuck.

I worked with this woman who had long black hair and she was real trim, and then she turned around and looked like Methusalas's mother. Ugh.

[WLDKATZ]

Originally Posted by ccgirl

Yuck.

I worked with this woman who had long black hair and she was real trim, and then she turned around and looked like Methusalas's mother. Ugh.

lol
most men love long hair.........wondering if it is one of their unwritten rules???? what ya thinkin guys?

[WLDKATZ]

Rule number 100,002,001

Women must always read between the lines........lol and if they can't take responciblity for it!

[WLDKATZ]

rule number 1 Must carry a condom at all times!