Peering into the Abyss... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

tjp613 · 09-13-2009, 07:35 AM

Hi everyone.

I'm a 51 yr old mother of a recovering addict and that's what brought me here to SR. I stay here not only for my ongoing story with him, but because I find this is an amazing community in and of itself. Thank you all for that.

As part of my own recovery I decided to do something for ME that I've always wanted to do: I volunteered to work the domestic abuse hotline at our local women's center. I'm in the middle of a 74 hour training program and have enjoyed every single minute of it. I'm learning so much and am very anxious to get started with the work.

My own background reveals a life of relative privilege but I have been the victim of domestic abuse myself many years ago. However, while in our training I've come to realize that I will sometimes be talking with people who suffer greatly.... the lowest of the low.... women (and men) who have walked the streets since they were 13, heroin addicts who have been raped, women who are beaten regularly and within an inch of their lives, women who have zero self esteem remaining....etc, etc, etc.

I feel like I'm standing on the edge of an abyss and peering in. I've been leading a very sheltered life in comparison and I'm afraid (?) to pop my little bubble I've been living here in Suburbia. I'm anxious about how my fragile view of the world might change for the worse....become depressed and cynical. I dropped out of nursing school during my Pediatrics rotation because I couldn't tolerate their suffering.

I'm hoping that my Al-Anon 'wisdom' will help me to detach and I certainly have more tools in my belt than when I was 20.

Don't get me wrong -- I am totally committed to this program and I WILL STAY no matter what. I will figure out a way to process my feelings into appropriate compartments.

Anyone out there have experience with anything like this?

tjp613 · 09-13-2009, 07:56 PM

Hmmmm...guess not! LOL I'm flying solo!! Aaaaaack!

***Pelican*** · 09-20-2009, 08:00 PM

Don't despair. Why not post this in F&F forum. I know some of the members there that have years of Alanon under their belt have done volunteer work with shelters.

I come to SR almost every day, several times a day. I just haven't been in the Cafe for ages.

Congratulations on reaching out and getting involved in your community. Keep us posted!

09-13-2009, 07:35 AM	#1 (permalink)
tjp613 Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 411 Blog Entries: 1	Peering into the Abyss... Hi everyone. I'm a 51 yr old mother of a recovering addict and that's what brought me here to SR. I stay here not only for my ongoing story with him, but because I find this is an amazing community in and of itself. Thank you all for that. As part of my own recovery I decided to do something for ME that I've always wanted to do: I volunteered to work the domestic abuse hotline at our local women's center. I'm in the middle of a 74 hour training program and have enjoyed every single minute of it. I'm learning so much and am very anxious to get started with the work. My own background reveals a life of relative privilege but I have been the victim of domestic abuse myself many years ago. However, while in our training I've come to realize that I will sometimes be talking with people who suffer greatly.... the lowest of the low.... women (and men) who have walked the streets since they were 13, heroin addicts who have been raped, women who are beaten regularly and within an inch of their lives, women who have zero self esteem remaining....etc, etc, etc. I feel like I'm standing on the edge of an abyss and peering in. I've been leading a very sheltered life in comparison and I'm afraid (?) to pop my little bubble I've been living here in Suburbia. I'm anxious about how my fragile view of the world might change for the worse....become depressed and cynical. I dropped out of nursing school during my Pediatrics rotation because I couldn't tolerate their suffering. I'm hoping that my Al-Anon 'wisdom' will help me to detach and I certainly have more tools in my belt than when I was 20. Don't get me wrong -- I am totally committed to this program and I WILL STAY no matter what. I will figure out a way to process my feelings into appropriate compartments. Anyone out there have experience with anything like this?

09-20-2009, 08:00 PM	#3 (permalink)
*Pelican* peaceful seabird Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: floating Posts: 1,541	Don't despair. Why not post this in F&F forum. I know some of the members there that have years of Alanon under their belt have done volunteer work with shelters. I come to SR almost every day, several times a day. I just haven't been in the Cafe for ages. Congratulations on reaching out and getting involved in your community. Keep us posted! __________________ "How does one become a butterfly?" she asked pensively. "You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar." Trina Paulus Hope for the Flowers

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09-13-2009, 07:56 PM	#2 (permalink)
tjp613 Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 411 Blog Entries: 1	Hmmmm...guess not! LOL I'm flying solo!! Aaaaaack!

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