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"It was his theory, the theory of most immoralists, that the soul becomes intolerably burdened with lies that have to be told to the world in order to be permitted to live in the world, and that unless this burden is relieved by entire honesty with some one person, who is trusted and adored, the soul will finally collapse beneath its weight of falsity."

Tennessee Williams, "The Mysteries of the Joy Rio"

core dumping

Posted 03-14-2009 at 03:03 AM by tommygnosis (The Stranger's Always You)

Code:

%cat tommygnosis > bad_poetry.txt
 
10 %LS -AL 
20 My lossy compression algorithm had worked perfectly; 
30 my feelings converted into innocuous ones and zeroes, 
40 my memories, what was left of them, into pixels and hex codes. 
50 His eyes were #889E86. 
60                                Hers #A39681. 
70                                               The car was #A93E3B. 
80   
90 %SETENV _ GROUP 
100 I pinged

...

tommygnosis

A lonely two-legged creature

Posted in Uncategorized

Views 65 Comments 0 tommygnosis is offline

decorate me with blood, graffiti and spit

Posted 03-07-2009 at 10:58 PM by tommygnosis (The Stranger's Always You)

One thing I notice about people, unintentionally most of the time, is whether or not they have visible scars. You can usually tell who isn't bothered to have scars. Queued at the grocery store waiting to check out, the girl in front of me has faint scars that peek out from underneath the cuffs of her shirt. She doesn't want anyone to know. At the Bojangles, the man who works the checkout counter has a scar that can be seen rising above his t-shirt collar. I think it's the result of a surgical procedure....

tommygnosis

A lonely two-legged creature

Posted in trans

Views 140 Comments 1 tommygnosis is offline

Running head on

Posted 03-07-2009 at 10:56 PM by tommygnosis (The Stranger's Always You)

It may be 71 degrees outside but it's no less than 80 in my house, and I'm pretty sure that the combination of heat, sweat, and inner frustration will one day lead to my body being consumed by the flames of spontaneous combustion. Just one quick *poof* one night while I'm sitting on the edge of my bed and people will stare at my ashes and wonder if I somehow purposefully managed to do myself in, or if this is what the term "flaming homosexual" means, or if aliens retrieved me for one of...

tommygnosis

A lonely two-legged creature

Posted in trans

Views 80 Comments 0 tommygnosis is offline

cut me up into parts

Posted 03-07-2009 at 10:54 PM by tommygnosis (The Stranger's Always You)

It's hard to be gay and be dating a straight partner with the same gender identity. It's hard for both parties, but hardest for whichever one can't move beyond having to classify themselves and the relationship. It's hard to not have a self-definition that corresponds with the way other people define themselves. We muddle through, reminding each other to no just say that we don't care what other people think, but to actually believe it.

We have t-shirts with corrollating declarations....

tommygnosis

A lonely two-legged creature

Posted in trans

Views 67 Comments 0 tommygnosis is offline

Long story short

Posted 03-07-2009 at 10:52 PM by tommygnosis (The Stranger's Always You)

When I first started telling people about the changes I was making my life, person after person asked the same questions: "Are you sure this is what you want to do?" and "Have you really thought about it?" As if I had just woken up that morning and said to myself, "What can I do to really freak people out today?" As if I had ever done anything in my life, especially in the part of my life that they were a part of, without knowing what I was getting into as much as possible....

tommygnosis

A lonely two-legged creature

Posted in trans

Views 69 Comments 0 tommygnosis is offline

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