Losing my wife after 10 years. input please
Posted 01-29-2008 at 12:44 AM by rvpurple
As a child I was abused for years after my parents disowned me and put me in state custody to grow up. Those years changed my life and really ucked up my mind. I never had anyone to talk to or trust just when I started to they to give up on me. years later after abusing drugs I thought helped me deal with my problems. Well about all it did was help me bottle up my problems and everything seemed fine to everyone on the outside but inside I am the saddest person. I am very outgoing and like to make people laugh and always "click" with people. In 1997 I met the girl of my dreams and she is the greatest creature god ever created. She came from this thing called family. I dont know this way of life and she makes me feel more loved and I trust her with everything. After getting together with her my problems seemed solved. We got married and I was the luckiest guy on earth to have her as the most glowing hottest bride I have ever seen. I have never felt such love! But then my past slowly started to catch back up with me and the visions, screams and nightmares came back and started to change how I was with her and she started using cocaine when I did and now for the past 14 months been smokin crack and both unhappy but we both love each other. 2 days ago my world fell out from underme and she told me she was unhappy and wants me to move out of state. We both are wanting to get clean and make changes for the better. I am more scared then ever before. I am just relizing how bad I ucked up losing and not paying attention to her wants and needs. Again I feel alone and my childhood is not on my mind. Only thing is how to save my marriage and get her back. I know she loves me but she is not happy and I want nothing less than happy for her. My problems are worse than ever I am alone and have lost the most special thing in the world because I am selfish controlling and want nothing but the best for me. Now I want nothing more than her to have all of me and her not to have to worry about me. I am happy just having her in my life and dont want anything else. Should we go counsiling or should we let love bring us back? Any suggestions would be great. ThanksTotal Comments 3
Comments
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I'm sure someone will come along with better advice than me but first of all, well done on realising you need to get help. I think you need to let your wife go so she can work on her problems and so that you can work on you. You've tried to cover up your issues for years and they've continued to manifest. I doubt you're bringing out the the best in each other at the moment. I
hope you'll be able to get back together but a little time out to gain a better perspective and for both of you to heal in your own and needed ways could be a very good thing.
I think counselling could be a good idea but you should have individual as well as couple.Posted 01-29-2008 at 12:54 AM by Gambaru
- I have to agree with Gambaru. Sound advicePosted 01-29-2008 at 08:22 AM by cherriedragon
- If you keep using cocaine you will probably lose more than your wife.Good time to clean up and maybe aproach your wife in the future as a sober personPosted 08-10-2009 at 09:55 AM by tarpon1010
