http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/ Online Support Groups for Addicts, Alcoholics and their Family, Friends and Loved Ones. Mon, 23 Nov 2009 11:26:54 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/ http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/2139-singleness-purpose-amend.html Mon, 04 May 2009 13:14:03 GMT I have had a copy of this for a while, I think some of you may enjoy it, others may not. I recently completed the Eighth Step and have decided that my first amends should be to Alcoholics... I have had a copy of this for a while, I think some of you may enjoy it, others may not.

I recently completed the Eighth Step and have decided that my first
amends should be to Alcoholics Anonymous itself, which I believe I have
harmed to some extent by violating its singleness of purpose.

I used to identify myself as an alcoholic and an addict. I do not
anymore because I now believe other addictions are irrelevant at AA
meetings. But, aside from that, I also used to insist on talking about
my other addictions beyond what was necessary to relate them to alcohol.

I justified this by saying that alcohol was just another drug and so it
was unfair to expect me not to talk about all my addictions. And refused
to attend any other fellowship because I claimed to prefer the wisdom
and sobriety in AA.

I realize now how inconsiderate and self-centered this position was. It is
not a question of what is fair or whether alcohol is just another drug. The
Traditions and primary purpose of AA are what they are whether I agree
with them or not.

In the past, when I was active, I often had dinner at the homes of
people who did not use drugs, but who did drink. I never considered
insisting that I had the right to smoke a joint at their dinner table
because they were drinking wine.

And imagine if I had, and then added insult to injury by saying: "And
not only do I have a right to use any drug I want to around here if
you're going to drink, but I'm going to keep coming back and I'm going
to keep using any drug I want to in your home because I like the food
you serve and your company better than the food and company I find in
the homes of my drug addict friends.

And I have the right to do this because all drugs are the same and I
don't care what the rules or customs of your home are.

Such a gross abuse of hospitality sounds preposterous, but that is
essentially what I was doing by insisting that I had a right to violate
AA's singleness of purpose. I was abusing the hospitality of this
Fellowship.

This is not an apology. I was too sick to realize how selfishly I was
acting, and a mere apology is not necessarily an amends.

I am hoping to amend the harm I did by stating clearly what I did, for
the benefit of others, and, further, by not doing it again. ]]> Rob B http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/2139-singleness-purpose-amend.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/13-daily-10-11th-step-inventory.html Fri, 21 Dec 2007 18:03:31 GMT I have been using this form for a while, it is from www.aaprimarypurpose.org This has been a great tool to face and be rid of that which blocks me from the sunlight of the spirit. 10th/ 11th... I have been using this form for a while, it is from www.aaprimarypurpose.org This has been a great tool to face and be rid of that which blocks me from the sunlight of the spirit.


10th/ 11th Step Date: _____/_____/_____

The Twelve Nightly Questions [86:1]

Chronology of today’s events:

1. How was I resentful? (if so, do 4-column
inventory)

2. How was I selfish (i.e. egotistical, self-seeking)?

3. How was I dishonest?

4. How was I afraid?

5. Do I owe an apology? Who did I help today?

6. What have I wrongly kept secret?

7. Was I unkind (i.e. cruel, harsh, unfeeling)? What did I accomplish today?

8. Was I unloving (i.e. cold, unresponsive, indifferent)?

9. What could I have done better? What I am grateful for today?

10. Was I thinking of myself most of the time?

11. Was I thinking of what I could do for others? Who needs my prayers today?

12. Was I thinking what I could pack into the stream of life?


But we are careful not to drift into worry, remorse, or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review we ask God’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken We say a Prayer:

“God, please forgive me for my failings today. I know that because of my failings I was not able to be as effective as I could have been for you. Please forgive me and help me live thy will better tomorrow. Father, I ask that you now show me how to correct the errors I have just outlined. Guide me and direct me. Please remove my arrogance and my fear. Show me how to make my relationships right, and grant me the humility and strength to do Thy will. Amen.” ]]> Rob B http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/13-daily-10-11th-step-inventory.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/11-big-book-do-we-really-need.html Fri, 21 Dec 2007 15:48:38 GMT Very often, a newcomer is told, “Don’t waste your time with the Big Book. It was written back in the 1930’s and has never been brought up to date. We know so much more now.” Of course, that type... Very often, a newcomer is told, “Don’t waste your time with the Big Book. It was written back in the 1930’s and has never been brought up to date. We know so much more now.” Of course, that type of statement is made by a person or persons who have never bothered to put the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous to the test as did the Authors of the Big Book nor those of us who have accepted that challenge.

If we take a moment and look at what Alcoholics Anonymous is really about, we will readily recognize that a particular problem, alcoholism is what drove us to this Fellowship in search of a way to avoid death or permanent insanity by drinking. And it would appear from some of the oldest historical writings that alcoholism has been around since the early days of mankind. In that great spiritual history book the Bible, King Solomon wrote his observations of alcoholics in Proverbs 23. What he witnessed is no different than the manner in which alcoholics react to alcohol today.
The recovered members of Alcoholics Anonymous state that the God of their understanding, that they found as the result of taking the Steps by the Big Book, has proved to be the Solution to their alcoholism as well as all their other problems. We can be quite certain that the God of our understanding has not changed in recent years. So, since the Problem, Alcoholism, hasn’t changed and the Solution, God as we understood Him, hasn’t changed, what is so new? And what method of dealing with alcoholism has produced more recovered alcoholics than the Twelve Step Program of Alcoholics Anonymous? There isn’t anything that can begin to touch the success of the Program of recovery as outlined in the Basic Text for the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Unfortunately, many who seek help for their alcoholism bet their life on the Fellowship and meetings rather than the Program, i.e. the life giving Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous protected by the life saving Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. That has proved to be a fatal mistake for hundreds of thousands of alcoholics. Rarely, if ever, do the alcoholics who apply and live by the Program ever return to drinking. Very few of those who bet their life on the Fellowship and meetings ever stay sober. And all the new information that we now know only compounds the fatality rate of alcoholics who seek shelter within the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. An intimate relationship with our Heavenly Father is our only hope for a happy and purposeful sobriety. The real purpose of putting the Twelve Steps to work in our lives is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us, not to impress folks with our wit, ideas, opinions, philosophy and the nature of our issues in meetings. ]]> Rob B http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/11-big-book-do-we-really-need.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/10-importance-tradition.html Fri, 21 Dec 2007 15:30:44 GMT With the publication of the Big Book in April, 1939, followed by Jack Alexander’s article in the Saturday Evening Post in March, 1941, which gave Alcoholics Anonymous a most enthusiastic endorsement,... With the publication of the Big Book in April, 1939, followed by Jack Alexander’s article in the Saturday Evening Post in March, 1941, which gave Alcoholics Anonymous a most enthusiastic endorsement, A.A. became a national institution. A new era had descended on the world. Hopeless alcoholics had, for the second time in the history of mankind, been given an opportunity to escape death or permanent insanity from the fatal malady -- alcoholism.

Very early on, Bill W. became aware of the need of some guidelines for conduct within the Fellowship. He had been made aware of the Washington Temperance Movement (Washingtonians) which had existed for a brief period a century earlier. A small band of men, each of whom had a serious drinking problem, pledged to stop drinking. They did so by fellowship and telling their stories at meetings held for such a purpose. Their success was phenomenal. Within 3 - 4 years, they had grown to more than 100,000 members. With their success came the notion that, if they could help alcoholics stay sober, they ought to be able to help anyone with any type of problem. They also had an idea that if they could get the endorsement of the leading citizens of their communities, they would further accelerate their growth. Their departure from their singleness of purpose led to their downfall. In as short a time as they had gained success, they had vanished. So much so that when Bill W. began analyzing the problems and difficulties of the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, he had never heard of the Washingtonians. Their history was brought to Bill’s attention and became the basis for the work he had ahead of him. Two things became very obvious to Bill as he studied the history of the Washingtonians:

1) They had no defined program of action to achieve sobriety.
2) They had no code of conduct for the Fellowship.

With the publication of the Big Book, the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous had the well-defined Program of Action -- The life-giving Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. The need for the code of conduct was becoming more and more obvious with each passing day.

Through the correspondence Bill received, telephone conversations and traveling around the country visiting as many groups as was possible, Bill was able to make some very profound observations. He was able to observe how successful groups functioned. He was also able to clearly see what other groups were doing that led to their demise. He started to codify his observations and began his campaign to develop “an Alcoholics Anonymous Tradition of Relations --- Twelve Points to Assure Our Future.” Bill used every method available to him to sell the Fellowship on the need of what he came to know would be vital to our growth and success. One of the principal means was through the “Grapevine.” Beginning in 1945, Bill began writing articles explaining the need for these guidelines. Many of these articles are reprinted in a Grapevine publication, “THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART.”

For the next five years, Bill devoted most of his time to trying to convince the Fellowship of the need for the “Twelve Traditions Of Alcoholics Anonymous.” The idea of a national conference to discuss and adopt these principles of group conduct by an informed Group Conscience bore fruit in Cleveland, Ohio, in July, 1950. Each Tradition was presented to the Fellowship by an A.A. member. Each was voted on and adopted unanimously. They were born from the failure of many groups and the needless deaths of many chronic alcoholics. Or as Bill put it, “These lifesaving Traditions were hammered out on the anvils of experience.” Most unfortunately, the lack of adherence to these precious principles is the reason for the demise of so many groups and the needless deaths of many hopeless, helpless alcoholics today. ]]> Rob B http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/10-importance-tradition.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/9-drug-drug-drug-not-really.html Fri, 21 Dec 2007 14:22:16 GMT The following Article is written by CLiff B, member of the primary purpose Dallas Group. One of the problems existing in the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous is the confusion that has been... The following Article is written by CLiff B, member of the primary purpose Dallas Group.

One of the problems existing in the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous is the confusion that has been brought in from the treatment industry which combines alcoholism with drug/narcotic addiction and terms it “substance abuse” or “chemical dependency”. The Information Bulletin F-2 is one of the A.A. publications that addresses this problem.

While there maybe several similarities, there are very substantial differences between alcoholism and any form of addiction. When it comes to drug/narcotic addiction, one of the most outstanding differences is the fact that it is estimated that only about 10% of our population possesses the physical deficiencies that lead to alcoholism while just about anyone and everyone can become addicted to certain drugs/narcotics.

It is a well established fact that the use of several drugs/narcotics will produce an addiction to that drug/narcotic in a very short period of time. That is not so for the drug alcohol. The majority of folks can tolerate only relatively small amounts of alcohol at a given moment. If they drink too much, the liver senses an excess amount of a toxic substance and causes the person to vomit. The normal person will quit, go home and usually won’t touch another drop for a significant period of time. Not so with the real alcoholic. The chronic alcoholic, on vomiting, will immediately seek another drink.

The alcoholic will experience “black-outs”; alcoholic amnesia. Most drugs do not produce such an occurrence. The alcoholic awakens from sleep, or comes to from being “passed out” and finds it necessary to have a drink, at once. Chronic alcoholism develops to a point where the alcoholic is unable to tolerate food. There are other differences as well.

In 1953, members of Alcoholics Anonymous, who also were addicted to drugs/narcotics, and wanting to preserve the effectiveness of the singleness of purpose, asked for and received approval from the General Service Board of Alcoholics Anonymous to found a Fellowship to be called “Narcotics Anonymous”. Once that Fellowship adopted the Twelve Traditions of Narcotics Anonymous, they began to flourish and were successful in helping addicts abstain from the drugs/narcotics that had gained control of their lives. Following the founding of NA, came Gamblers, Overeaters, Sex Addicts, Emotions, etc. Anonymous. Most of these were founded by alcoholic members of A.A. who were also victims of these other problems. As of this writing, there are over 200 anonymous fellowships which have borrowed and adapted the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous to meet some unique and well defined problem.

Since the effect of a particular drug/narcotic differs from the next, members of NA came to appreciate the singleness of purpose that had made Alcoholics Anonymous so successful, began to found Fellowships which focused on a particular drug/narcotic. Since 1982, approximately 20 such Fellowships have come into existence, each providing recovery from a specific drug/narcotic, i.e. Cocaine Anonymous, Drugs Anonymous, Pills Anonymous, Marijuana Anonymous, etc.

So, no, alcoholism and drug addiction are not the same. If they were, NA would not have been needed. And since there are now so many Fellowships using the Power of the Twelve Steps to solve their individual problems, it would appear that an addiction is not an addiction is not an addiction and none of them are the same as alcoholism!!! ]]> Rob B http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/rob-b/9-drug-drug-drug-not-really.html