k three times in one week i was admitted to the hosp. twice over night and once a little longer. I really thought something was up. my stomache hurt so bad. no amount of medication helped. but one week later and they say nothing is wrong with me. NOW I KNOW THATS NOT TRUE, but my chrones was not active. in fact my stomache lookes healthier than in a long time. so this brings me back to the pain. its still there whether chronic or pyschosymatic its there. but no more meds. ive made up my mind.again....

dealing with a touchy situation this week. you see i was diagnosed with chrones about 4 years ago. so there are times i really need pain meds. last night for example i was admitted to the hospital with severe dehydration. i was in alot of pain and hadn't been able to stop throwing up all day. so you can see that the responsibility is on me to keep my problems at bay. but i guess it always has been. i have been able to keep myself to only taking the meds when needed, but cant help but feel...

Bare with me... i dont know how to start. last night was beyond brutal. sweated through two comforters. I woke up at 4:30 am moved to the couch, and tossed and turned for another hour and a half. then decided to use. i justified it, as i hadn't used much just enough to relieve myself about 1/30 of my old dose. now that i feel better i find myself deppressed that i used at all. i let down myself and my girl. she dosn't know but if she did she would be dissappaionted i'm sure. its so hard to...