http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/ Online Support Groups for Addicts, Alcoholics and their Family, Friends and Loved Ones. Thu, 16 Feb 2012 07:17:06 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/ http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2293-1.html Wed, 08 Jul 2009 02:37:53 GMT 1 1 ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2293-1.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2281-grocery-store.html Sun, 05 Jul 2009 22:29:15 GMT So today I had to get some groceries. I took my youngest son with me to this gourmet store that I find easy to get in and out of quickly. We got some stuff and P was riding in the carriage. I saw... So today I had to get some groceries. I took my youngest son with me to this gourmet store that I find easy to get in and out of quickly. We got some stuff and P was riding in the carriage. I saw a cute guy. You never know where and when you are going to meet people. A friend of mine, recently divorced, met his (second) true love of his life in a bookstore. They are now married. Sweet. Anyways, I am in an area with muffins that is a little tight on space. I swing my cart around and smash into a display of olive oil. A bunch of bottles come tumbling down, a huge accident. Amazingly, only one breaks. Everyone is looking at me. Mind you, I have not been drinking at all, but it reminded me of some of my antics when I was drunk. I was a very clumsy drunk. I was not mean spirited, but clumsy, and sloppy....and emotional.... and flirty when drunk. Anyways, we make our way to the cash register. Cute guy is in front of me. He is buying a lot of stuff. I look over at the next cashier. It is virtually free, but I stay in line after cute guy because I'm not in a rush. I look in back of me and the woman in back is the one who witnessed the olive oil catastrophe. So my son decides to "help" me by putting all of the groceries on the checkout counter. I tell him "That's okay, I can do it." He says, "No, I can do it myself." So I figure, okay, give him some independence and I let him do this himself. Bad idea. He picks up a large, heavy container of yogurt and drops it on the floor. Splat. Yogurt all over the place. I look to the woman behind me and say, "They are going to kick us out of this place." Cute guy looks at me, smiles and says, "I saw the olive oil, too." Like something out of a Meg Ryan movie, only I did not end up with the guy :{ Such is life. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2281-grocery-store.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2277-avatar.html Sat, 04 Jul 2009 23:44:52 GMT So I was sick of being a little cartoon avatar on here so posted a (somewhat blurry) picture of me from a webcam. I figured if someone recognizes me, so be it. It's a big world. Probably won't happen. And if it does, it will be someone actively looking here on a sobriety website and who would do that but someone with a problem of their own. I guess I'm feeling a lot more comfortable about all of this now that I've got 7, yep, 7 days behind me. It wasn't even a question whether or not I would drink tonight. No more mind games, just don't do it. Had cereal for dinner to reduce the temptation (wine does NOT go with cereal) and also because it's healthy. Happy 4th!!!!! ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2277-avatar.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2273-day-7-slept-better-than-i-have-ages.html Sat, 04 Jul 2009 15:53:54 GMT Well, my sleep has recovered. Last night I had the most incredible sleep and dreams. I had an appointment with my therapist yesterday and it helped.... A LOT. Someone really cares about me... Well, my sleep has recovered. Last night I had the most incredible sleep and dreams. I had an appointment with my therapist yesterday and it helped.... A LOT. Someone really cares about me (granted I'm paying him for this, but it does feel that way and it is what it is.)

My dream was meaningful. In my email to XXX, I said:

And then I had this dream about you. In the dream, you were living in an apartment in Paris. It was on busy street, on the corner. I was in Paris for some odd reason. I was walking right by your apartment. I stopped for a minute, trying to decide if I should call you. Something told me to keep walking. But then I thought: Here I am in Paris, I have to at least say hi. So I called you on my cell phone. You were there and said to come on up. So I did. The rest is a little fuzzy, but we ended up together.

Just a dream, but a nice one. Being sober doesn't suck. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2273-day-7-slept-better-than-i-have-ages.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2272-day-6-got-through.html Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:51:18 GMT I had an online counseling appointment this morning. It was very, and I mean VERY helpful. Tonight I did have a pretty intense craving for a cold glass of chardonnay, but it passed. I let it pass.... I had an online counseling appointment this morning. It was very, and I mean VERY helpful. Tonight I did have a pretty intense craving for a cold glass of chardonnay, but it passed. I let it pass. I am re-training myself, and I think it is working. I have never been in counseling regularly in my whole life. I'm thinking this is good for me. Everyone's experience with alcohol and situation is a little different. That's where the individual part of it comes in... someone to deal with just your problems. I don't want to say this is getting easy, but it's like, "Yeah, yeah. I know the drill. Craving comes. Ignore it. It's gone. Done. On to tomorrow." ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2272-day-6-got-through.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2266-day-4-some-days-easy.html Thu, 02 Jul 2009 02:38:43 GMT Today I did not think about alcohol at all (or if I did, I can't remember it). There were some stressful moments of the day, but I never thought about drinking to dull the pain, etc. I knew I was going to yoga tonight. I have not been in 3 weeks or so and NEEDED to go. So I got there, at first was tense, but very quickly got into the class and felt like a million times better by the end. After coming out of class, the last thing you feel like doing is drinking. NOTE TO SELF: Go to yoga more often!!! ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2266-day-4-some-days-easy.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2260-day-3.html Wed, 01 Jul 2009 01:58:14 GMT I'm okay, but really, really tired. Some days are just like that. I had a craving for some cold white wine after work today. The craving was fairly bad for a little while, but I rode it out and was okay. Today was a little harder than yesterday. Hoping Day 4 will be a little easier. So... not much else, just need some sleep after a busy day. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2260-day-3.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2255-day-2.html Mon, 29 Jun 2009 18:24:20 GMT I've decided to discontinue writing in my paper journal -- it's so much easier to type. Had a very good day with youngest son -- to the doctor for his physical, the shoe store, McDonald's for lunch and the toy store for a little surprise for him for being so brave (he had to have blood taken, poor little guy!) I am doing fine. No cravings for any alcohol, then again it's rare for me to have cravings in the middle of the day. I'm just waiting for that first craving to hit, and it will, and just how I'm going to deal with it when it does. So far, nothing. One of the things that is helping me is to remember the most embarrassing incidents I can think of that I have done as a result of drinking. There were a few doosies. The next time I think of picking up a glass of wine, I will think of the time I fell on the ground going to get my trash can (and a neighbor saw me) or worse.... cannot even write in here! Well, the day is going well. Let's keep it that way. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2255-day-2.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2254-fireworks-tonight.html Mon, 29 Jun 2009 02:00:16 GMT On my new Day 1, there were delightful fireworks in the sky near our house. At first I was surprised, since 4th of July is still a ways off. But then I decided to take it as a sign, a good one, for... On my new Day 1, there were delightful fireworks in the sky near our house. At first I was surprised, since 4th of July is still a ways off. But then I decided to take it as a sign, a good one, for my future and the day I picked to do this (well, again). Maybe it's for real this time. It felt great watching the fireworks totally sober and feeling like myself. Nice end to the day. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2254-fireworks-tonight.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2253-day-1.html Sun, 28 Jun 2009 18:25:27 GMT Well, it's my son's birthday today. 6 years ago today[FONT="Comic Sans MS"][/FONT] I was giving birth. Today, hopefully a new start for me. Here's what I wrote in my journal (paper one):[FONT="Comic Sans MS"][/FONT]

Hard to believe it has taken me so long. So many false starts. Could this be it? Could that be my last hangover EVER? And wouldn't that be awesome? Hangovers are the worst. I think it's nature's way of telling us not to do that again. Why don't we listen? I have had so many days when I've said "I'm no longer going to drink." I hope this one is it. Can I just allow it to happen? I drank 3 times in the past week ... and none were very satisfying. It's not even fun anymore. So, I know what I need to do. Now I just have to do it. I'm shooting for 14 days straight without alcohol, and when I get there, I'll set a new goal. Day 1 - Welcome. ]]> hopeful999 http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/blogs/hopeful999/2253-day-1.html