tight chest;
dry mouth;
fluttering stomach;
crawling skin;
heaviness on my shoulders;
tiredness of the spirit;
and agitation of the mind.

When these sensations come together my mind interprets the resulting overall picture as 'wanting to drink'. Really though, when I look at it like that, the sensations are discomfort more akin to anxiety with a touch of despondency. Wanting to drink is what my mind signals as the solution to the discomfort...

My hurdle isn't the first few days or even that first weekend these days. The binges are further apart, the amount of drugs is zero and the alcohol is less.... but still that part of me that wants to go at it, to obliterate my mind, to escape myself is there.... I am just better at holding it off these days. A lot of that is situational, in that I don't know anyone who would keep up with me these days in this new city I have moved too. Which was the whole idea behind my move. It would only take...