oops... i did it again. :(

today I called in sick to work even though technically I am well. I always feel so guilty when I do that, as if it's some sort of crime to take care of me and heal. I really needed a day of introspection. Last night my friend called me up who lives 3 hrs. away and said, "I'm in town, come meet up with me for a cold one." And I went. Against my better judgement. And I drank. I didn't get hammered, thank god, but I did have 3 drinks, and just like that, there goes almost 3 months of sobriety. ARRRRRGGGGHHH! I know I need to try not to be too hard on myself and just pick myself up and start over, but it's hard. I really was doing so well... it just goes to show that I am clearly not ready to hit the bars with my friends if I intend to stay sober. There was some guy there who was selling oxy, too, and it took every ounce of self-control i possessed to tell him no. So today I woke up, thanked whoever might be responsible for one more day in this world, and tried to overcome my overwhelming sense of shame.