Response to Hammer's post about humanity

[harleyrunt]

I did type this out as a reply, but then changed it to a thread, because I wanted to make sure you ALL see it. This is my reply to Hammer's Humanity post:

You did the right thing man. I work with this kind of parenting everyday. Yeah, you probably guess it with the last sentence I work in a program rehabiltating juvenile deliquients/juvenile drug addicts. Every day I personally want throttle someone's set of parents for this same exact behavior. Then yesterday one of my bosses told me I care too much!!! How can you care about these type of kids too much?? Can any of you of my older pals explain that to me? No dig with the age comment, but I am pretty young yet and just wondered if you guys can tell me am I wrong for caring? I do my job and have the respect of all of my kids. I work with people everyday that these kids hit and think nothing of it, in 3 and a half years I have never had one kid come at me. I get told remarks like " I respect you because you talk to me NOT AT ME" or "I know you are not here for the paycheck" I have kids that go out and ruin their sobriety and come to ME not their caseworkers and say" man I screwed up this weekend I used can you help me start over" All my job is really glorified babysitter I provide transportation and cook for them. But these kids see me in my Harley shirt and for some reason attach themselves to me and say before they hear my story "I just know you have been their too." To tell you guys the god's honest truth it upset me so bad that I wanted to use, but I didn't I'm better than that now. My only addiction now is to dark chocolate and I don't think god is going to think any thing less of me for that one indulgence. Alot of it is because I can come here and rant to you guys and I know we help each other keep each other sober. I know I have only been here a small time but bless you guys for taking in a younger biker and helping keep them sober. I hope you all realize how much what you say guides me and helps me guide them!!!! So not only do I want to thank each one of you for helping me, but also for helping me help them.

[Jazzed_N_MD]

Originally Posted by harleyrunt

I did type this out as a reply, but then changed it to a thread, because I wanted to make sure you ALL see it. This is my reply to Hammer's Humanity post:

You did the right thing man. I work with this kind of parenting everyday. Yeah, you probably guess it with the last sentence I work in a program rehabiltating juvenile deliquients/juvenile drug addicts. Every day I personally want throttle someone's set of parents for this same exact behavior. Then yesterday one of my bosses told me I care too much!!! How can you care about these type of kids too much?? Can any of you of my older pals explain that to me? No dig with the age comment, but I am pretty young yet and just wondered if you guys can tell me am I wrong for caring? I do my job and have the respect of all of my kids. I work with people everyday that these kids hit and think nothing of it, in 3 and a half years I have never had one kid come at me. I get told remarks like " I respect you because you talk to me NOT AT ME" or "I know you are not here for the paycheck" I have kids that go out and ruin their sobriety and come to ME not their caseworkers and say" man I screwed up this weekend I used can you help me start over" All my job is really glorified babysitter I provide transportation and cook for them. But these kids see me in my Harley shirt and for some reason attach themselves to me and say before they hear my story "I just know you have been their too." To tell you guys the god's honest truth it upset me so bad that I wanted to use, but I didn't I'm better than that now. My only addiction now is to dark chocolate and I don't think god is going to think any thing less of me for that one indulgence. Alot of it is because I can come here and rant to you guys and I know we help each other keep each other sober. I know I have only been here a small time but bless you guys for taking in a younger biker and helping keep them sober. I hope you all realize how much what you say guides me and helps me guide them!!!! So not only do I want to thank each one of you for helping me, but also for helping me help them.

Just...

[toad]

Great response Harleyrunt......I pray that you are doing well. Share this with me......



"We have to stay sober no matter how life treats us, no matter whether nonalcoholics appreciate our sobriety or not. We have to keep our sobriety independent of everything else, not entangled with any people, and not hedged in by any cop-outs or conditions. Over and over, we have found we cannot stay sober long just for the sake of wife, husband, children, lover, parents, other relative, or friend, nor for the sake of a job, nor to please a boss (or doctor or judge or creditor) -- not for anyone other than ourselves."

Living Sober, p. 64

[best]

As for if you care to much? What is to much?
We can give of ourselves and give till it hurts and still give more.
When we give so much that our own health and sobriety become endangered... then we are giving to much.
Accepting what we can't change and putting it in the hands of the only one who can change it is a lesson we use often or if not used...we would be caring to much.

What greater gift then to give our life for another.

I won't worry about caring to much unless you find you are giving up your life vs giving over your life for others. One would be giving away, the other would be giving to.

Sure looks like you give to so that others may live.

Wow! ditto

[The_Hammer]

HR, I know what the "too much" mantra is all about. You folks that have been around me, both here and at RFL 07, know my background in the USAF and otherwise. Ya see HR, I was a Flight Surgeon's PA, a battlefield surgeon's assistant. at my PDS at Elmendorf AFB in AK. I was in med school at Alaska Pacific University. But when I got back from Lebanon, I dropped out. I commenced my drinkin and dopin career in earnest. I am diagnosed with PTSD. I take elavil for sleepwalking, because in my gourd I believe I am in Lebanon at times, 25 years later.

Because I care too much.

My bro BillJ nailed it. How do ya make a call like that? Maybe their just poor. maybe this, maybe that. But I know these folks. They're addicts. Their kids got nothin because it's all up they're folks noses, dig? There wasn't a damned thing heroic about what I did. I did the only thing this drunk's program and ESH would allow me to do with a straight head. I bawled like a child all the way to work. Thanks for the kind words.