Pattern in my Life...

[historyteach]

Hi, Mark;

Just something I'd like to explore here a bit...Any thoughts would be appreciated.

I have seen a pattern in my life; I always seem to hook up with or I'm attracted to people who have addictions of some type. I think that's against the probabilities of random chance. Therefore, I've started looking at myself; what is it about me that is either attracted to or attracting addicts???

Then again, my ex was not an addict when we met nor for many years of our marriage. It wasn't until the latter part of our marriage that he caught the gambling fevor. So, did I awake some latent tendency in him? Probably I'm not that powerful. But, my life has been surrounded by addictions.

Even since my divorce, the people I've casually dated and the one I was really attracted to have all addiction issues. Since the "luuuuvvvvv doctor" I haven't seen anyone else. I tend to run the other way. (He was/is a sex addict). Today, it seems, I am afraid to take a chance.

Sometimes, it's lonely. But, most of the time, my life is very full. I don't know. With Trevor, I just don't need any other issues. My hands are quite full. LOL!

Sometimes, I wonder if my HP is trying to tell me something...
I want serenity in my life. That's really the bottom line. But, does that mean being alone?

Thanks for any thoughts...

Shalom!

[MarkSichelCSW]

Debbie, you like many people, only gravitate toward addicts. I'd suggest that if you want to break that pattern, you should be dating people who are sober and clean. You probably would do well with an addict who is in sobriety. Stop asking why. You'll never know. It is what it is. and .....my warmest congratulations on your 6 month nicotine free anniversary; what an achievement!!!!

[historyteach]

THanks, Mark!

You know, I've thought about dating someone in recovery. Honestly, though, I'd be afraid they would relapse, and I'd have to deal with that!
I know, that's living in the future -- with the "what ifs," but, it's what I fear. I really don't want to deal with that, though.
Stupid, huh?

I suppose I'll just continue to take it one day at a time....

Shalom!

[MarkSichelCSW]

yeh...take it 1 day at a time; I've seen people with your exact feeling & then all of a sudden, its different & for the first time they're in a sober relationship & even having sex sober!!! So....a day at a time;' who knows what your HP has in store for you.

You know the saying...Man (or woman) plans.....God laughs. Stop planning & start laughing, Debbie, after all you've been through.