Now What am I gonna DO?

[pjplibra]

:yell: Ok....Just registered yesterday and posted message in Family/Friends..
I am going to be 50 in Oct...Yikes. Anyway lost job in May, Losing my car anyday...was still in lot when I last looked. In a wacko relationship with an alcoholic and began looking here for HIM but wonder if I am one also. Been reflecting a whole lot this past year and...

I have used something or other since 13. I was into speed, acid then quit it all when I became pregnant at 16. Daughter just turned 33. Son 31, Son 20. 5 Grandchildren. Married 7 years first time, 14 Next.

So, get to the point, right? At the age of 42, 8 years or so ago, I realized that I had been married HALF of my Life! So what have I been doing the last 8 years??? I find I go out to bars and drink for companionship. I also love to write, paint - draw,,,, make things and think. a lot. I did get GED and attended college.. had my own succesful business for 10 years even. then 2nd husband left me suddenly and I went through bankruptcy, 2nd son in car accident and lost part of his left leg, was stalked by a stranger, date raped.... enought of that! I am not whining about it just filling you (whoever you are), in.

I just have no clue how to entertain myself without alcohol... what do you all do???? Seriously.... I stayed home with my dog and cat the last 4 days and I am in need of human contact (of course drunk boyfried came over and put me down and I have cried everyday)... what is wrong with me? I think I am an intelligent kind person....

Now what?

[GuyBlakeKett]

well pjp...

since you logged onto this site, sounds like you think you may have a problem with your drinking. If so, get the number of Alcoholics Anonymous in your phone directory, find out where the nearest meeting is and go and listen and see if what you hear fits at all. Then talk to someone at the meeting. (Nice people go to meetings.)

Oh, there's plenty of things to do besides drink. You just have to love life and want to live first. Sounds like you're on the route to doing that now.

Give it a try. And keep us posted.

best -
and prayers -

Guy