Blake

I have a situation I need some advice on, PLEASE!!!!

I work in an office and both of the ladies I work with have been married to addicts. One of them died from an OD and the other one's got into AA and stayed clean for 2 days shy of a year. Well he called Teresa today (they have since been divorced and both have gotten remarried, now he is going through another divorce) and told her that he just couldn't do it anymore and he was going to kill himself (he has tried feebley 3 times in the past) and he just wanted her to know that he loves the kids and her(they have 2 boys togeather) Well teresa is freaking out about it and I don't blame her. She asked me what I thought and all I could say is that he needs to go to a meeting ASAP! I personally don't think he is really going to kill himself, why would he have called? The whole situation is stressing me out and I wish I could help, but I dont know what else I could do. I feel like teresa and her kids would probably be better off if he did kill himself...horrible huh? He brings teresa's life down all the time and he resents his kids and it hurts them. I know that the only way he will get better is to want to get better and there is nothing anyone can do to make him want to get better, but it still is a ****** situation. I care about teresa, I've been working with her for 4 years and I think of her like a big sister. I don't know what to tell her to make her feel better.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,
-Blake

Gooch

wow Blake.

Sounds like the guy needs a sponsor so he stops trying to dump his misery on his ex.

best advice I can offer is to send some positive thoughts and prayers up that the ultimate authority take care of things in His infinite wisdom.

Blake

Thanks Gooch.

For some reason the guy refuses to go back to AA...he's been back out for like 3 years now. The dude is a Marine and I think that prolly has alot to do with it, not saying that marines are bad people, but they drill it into your head that you can tackle any problem on your own. I called my sponsor and talked to my HP about it after I posted and asked him to give Brian some guidance. Well right now brian is in the emergency room, voluntarily, and is waiting for them to find him a bed. They filled an emergency inpaitient request and now he is under a coroner's hold and has to go for atleast a 28 day program. I just hope that something sticks this time.

One of my friends in NA allways used to threaten her dad with suicide till one day her dad had enough and told her to just F*ing do it. She no longer wanted to kill herself when it stopped working as a manipulation tool. I think that is how Brian has been useing it in the past and I'm glad teresa didn't go over to his house to "save him". I think that if you looked up codependant in the dictionary it would have a picture of her...I think she is finally letting go of it though.

Thanks,
-Blake

Gooch

yep..

friend of mine caught pneumonia walking the other 6 miles to work in the rain, when his truck broke down. All he had to do was stop and use a phone, Any of the guys that worked with him would have come and got him.

Ex marine.

Hang in there.

mackat

yeh- the prayer thing....that's first.

my only ESH w/ other folks relationship stuff around our rooms is that i have often volunteered to talk with the guy AFTER he makes the committment to get to a meeting.
when i tried talking to them first, seemed like it always ended up as just talk.