CharacterDefect

Hello

I've been wondering about hearing my Higher Power's will for me. I've been doing so much taking from him and am feeling guilty about not giving back.

I know that part of me giving back to him is by sharing at meetings but I just don't know how to hear/know his will for me.

I pray about being a better parent to my children. I know this has to be in his will and maybe he doesn't think I'm ready to be a better parent, but that just sounds dumb. There's no time like the present to be better at that. I do pray about it and then come up with ways I can become better like getting better sleep, controlling my temper and such and pray about those things specifically. Maybe me thinking and coming up with ways I can be better is him helping me?

I still feel that if God wanted me to do something, I would know about it somehow. Maybe I already know the answer to this, eh? But true to my nature, I'm going to over analyze this

How do you hear or know your Higher Power's will? What is your Higher Power? What amazing things has he/she/it done for you? You don't have to answer all those (or any) questions, they're just things I would love to read about.

~J

best

Some times direct
Sometimes through others
and many times from reading His guide to life.(the bible)
I don't find a problem with hearing God's speaking to me. The problem was accepting what was said. I needed to get over a few issues. Clear away some things so I could become better able to follow what was said.
Pride, selfishness, ego, needed to learn what humble means.
Working the steps helps clear away so much that we are better able to do what is asked of us...His will for our lives.
I think you have your answer...as being the best parent we can be is right at the top of God's list for us parents.

Moontime

Most of the time I hear my God's will through other people. I also spend about 2 hours a day on a nice long walk. During this walk, I pray and meditate. I rest my mind from racing all day and become aware and mindful for that 2 hours. When I break down my primary purpose of God's will it's to stay clean and help someone else. But, in order for me to be able to help someone else, I need to do the proper work on myself. This includes going to meetings, doing step work, sponsoring men and having a relationship with a sponsor. A lot of things are also pretty cut and dry too. Do I think god's will for me was to smoke a pack of cigarrettes a day. I'd say no, he probably wants me healthy. So, I quit smoking and I work out/excercise everday. (72 days no cigs today). Little things like that I can hear God's will for me. Larger things, I believe god will speak through others at the precise moment. Keep Coming Back, More will be revealed with god's will for you.

CharacterDefect

Thank you both. I love to hear your insight as it helps me work this H.P. stuff out. I've been clean for 44 days today and I've developed a relationship with my H.P. already. He's helped me so much, even though I've only really gotten around to talking to him for a short amount of time. I'm worried I'm taking too much.

I want it now, now now! That just might be the addict in me though, lol.

Thanks again and Happy Valentines Day!

Moontime

God brought you to NA so you can hear the life saving message. Many addicts are dying not even knowing that there is another way of life. God chose us to walk through those doors.

WNY Addict

Are you working the steps with a sponsor, CharacterDefect? I think you'll find answers to your questions while working the steps with the right sponsor.

My higher power was God while I was simply practicing abstinence. Now, with the help of NA, my Higher Power is God, my sponsor, my sponcee brothers, NA meetings, support group meetings, prayer, meditation, the addict who is still suffering that shares at a meeting, the addict collecting a "Just for today" welcome tag after a relapse, the addict collecting a "multiple years" tag, the person I call while doing helpline service, my NA literature, my rosary, et cetera, et cetera. I can go on and on.

My Higher Power shows me things on a daily basis. It's not always very notable, but gifts are given on a daily basis. All I have to do is look outside myself to see my Higher Power's will and the gifts he's given me daily during my recovery. I've been given a second chance at life, and now it's my responsibility to share my experience, strength and hope so that others can possibly benefit from what I've been gifted with.

A Life Worth Living!

splendra

It was real hard for me to know my own will. I found that I confuse my will with His will much of the time. Questions I have learned to ask are: is it good for all concerned? What are my feelings about what I am about to do or say? Am I breaking or about to break one of the 10 commandments? How does this fit in with what Jesus said? Am I being honest? Loving? Wise? Am I minding my own business? Am I trying to control someone else?

Being a good parent means to me that I know my child has feelings and needs to have good boundries. Am I corecting my child in a way that is respectful or shaming? Or am I trying to be all powerful in his life? I have to remember that my child learns by example. Am I setting a good example....or am I confusing my child by saying don't do what I do.... do what I say....

nutz

By keepin an openmind,
It is however I notice when I hear God's will for me
is when I'm mellow or peaceful, not when I'm going
bonkers ,busy, or in loud places.

thourgh my tears
thourgh others
thourgh reading
thourgh nature
thourgh meditations or getting still to hear that soft gentle vioce.
thourgh events big or small
thourgh my actions of trying and trying and it dosen't work
then I stop, take brake. Then whala,it falls right into places.

I'm ever at a cross road in eveyday day or moments of my life.
I make a chioces all the time, Instant gradifications or to become better ??
A tool my sponor pasted on to me.
Do the hardest thing in front of you if you're confussed.

Yes, I had to be a provider.
However, my childred were my teachers.
I had to get on my knees and repect that 3 years old little girl :jeez
She wouldn't have it anyother way if you know what I mean.
They also though me to live and enjoy life without the use of drugs.
Children do not ly, they tell it like it is.

CharacterDefect

Wow, you all had great responses! Splendra and Nutz... you had great things to say about being a parent. I might even write those things down somewhere where I can read them over and over.

I saw a bit of God's work in my meeting on Tuesday. Actually a lot of it.

First of all, my husband came to the meeting with me and enjoyed it. I've been praying for him to attend with me since I went into NA.

Second was that a man had asked for prayer for his sister and neice. The sister has a drinking problem and the neice was suffering. That situation got better.

Then thirdly, I was praying for a man's wife who tried to commit suicide. She's now in treatment and their 6 year old son, after visiting the mother, didn't want to play any video games or listen to the radio because he wanted to "sit there quietly and enjoy mom's love" *tear*.

It was simply amazing! 3 things in one meeting that I've been praying for everyday were answered. Awesome!

I finished my first step but the lady I chose to be my sponsor isn't working out. It took me an amazing amount of effort to call her and the 5 times I have she's either been to busy to talk, just woke her up (at 8pm when she told me to call) and things like that. She even yelled at me for calling 5 times in a 2 hour period when she told me to call her. She was sleeping and didn't want to answer the phone. I told her that one might retort that she could of simply turned off the ringer if she didn't want the phone ringing. It's just not working well. I haven't been able to share my first step (it's been done for a month) to move on to the second and my sponsor acts a bit shamefully to not only me but others in NA. I need to nicely break up with her and find a new or temp sponsor.

Dawn10

That is a good question, to which I see you have received as many different answers as those who answered them.
God is my HP and He speaks to me through many ways. Predominantly, it is that little intuition that tells me what I need to do, know I should do and sometimes resist doing. One of my favorite lines is, " God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the Called.". To me that says, even if I think I can't do it, I can with His help.
He also speaks to me through what I read and study, through other people and through music. Especially the music. I am a singer and quite often, I hear a line in a song that I KNOW is meant for me to hear and meditate on and pray about.
Trust yourself. Trust what you feel. That is God speaking to you.
Dawn

CharacterDefect

Thanks Dawn.

I second guess a lot of things. I should just be more willing to accept his will, even though I don't get a letter or an audible voice telling me what it is.

WNY Addict

Don't worry about hurting her feelings, CD. This isn't a matter of being cordial, this is a matter of life or death. You may be doing okay without a sound sponsor at the moment, but the next addict she takes on may not do so well. Dropping her (and telling her why) could help save another addict down the road... and it's going to further your own recovery.

She doesn't sound like she's being of much support (she sounds rather erratic, actually) so it's time to drop her... fast. Sponsoring someone is a privilege, and unfortunately some people lose sight of that.

Get to some meetings, share your current issue, and you'll be sure to get a willing sponsor very quick.

Sponsorship is the heart of The Program.

logo

When I was asked to be a sponsor. I would say call me every day. Most never called. Then the day came when this guy called me every day. At that point I agreeded to be his sponsor.

gratefulgal

When I do my will, I pay a price. When I do God's will, I do not pay a price.