dsmaxis10

My last hospitalization which was 4-11-16 threw 4-14-16 was very pleasant. I have been hospitalized 16 times sober. I tried to quit all my meds and was in deep dooo doo. I admit I have been struggling all year but I'm finally stable. Tapering of benzos being I haven't gone past 41 days not drinking in 3 and a third years. Drank a glass of wine yesterday and drove after okay more like 12 oz. Nothing like I drank last year this year but I just can't stop. Benzo for temporary use I just want of them. First time I committed myself all others involountary 15 to be exact arrested stackled to stretchers four point restraints. Anyways I've decided to quit AA cause there so against taking mood and mind altering drugs which to me is medication for schizophrenia, In the big book it says never belittle a good Dr or psych. Bill Wilson took acid into his 70s and wanted people to take it at meetings he's sober but I'm not all my sponsors have said.

Bekindalways

Hey Dsmaxis, good to hear you are feeling more stable.

Hope you can stay away from the alcohol. Have you found any other support besides AA that has been helpful.

dsmaxis10

I have my big book and 12n12 and help other's everyday I will be back to AA once I get off the prescribed benzo. I admit I drank a 24oz of Modelo last night. Because resentment is the number one offender. Were do people like me go. When I started my journy even the slightest alcohol makes me lose my connection with GOD a Spiritual death . I will never give up.

dox

Any layperson in AA, or anywhere else, who tells you not to take medication as prescribed by a doctor is WRONG.

They, and you, should read this AA pamphlet:

http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-11_...ersMedDrug.pdf

We should not misuse or abuse prescription medication.
But, if we are under doctors orders we should take our meds as directed.

dsmaxis10, you and I both know this from experience.

Like you, if I stop taking my meds, I will be back in hospital, or worse.

But this is not only our experience and my less-than-humble opinion . . .

Read the pamphlet, please.

dox

I hope that AA can still work for you, dsmaxis10.

In my experience it really does work, if you work at it; even for those of us with dual diagnosis.

I have never been saner than now, as a result of the 12 steps and continuing my medication.

Here is another useful link that deals with AA and mental health issues:

http://www.sonomacountyaa.org/get-in...lth-Issues.pdf

The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking.

Keep it simple, please.

talldude

Smoking weed allowed me to quit drinking. When I felt the old juices flowing, where I needed to do hard stuff again and engage in some law-breaking, I quit the weed and got me some prescription meds via a legit medical doctor.

Will there ever be a day when I don't need prescription meds? I don't know. I don't care either. I'm living day to day and cannot worry about such things because that will contribute toward my anxiety by living in the future!

Don't let people tell you prescription meds are wrong unless you are one of those people who are abusing them and not trying to live a sober life.

Bekindalways

Love this Dsmaxis ^^^^^^^

I'm a lifer on antidepressants. I've been taking them for 25 -30 years. They don't cure the depression but it does help.

Find a different AA group if you can. That is pretty strange that someone recommended you go off prescribed meds.

Dox, I liked hearing that AA can work for folks with dual diagnosis. Some of you folks have quite the load to carry

dsmaxis10

Qwe I know AA works I had a resentment not all say that. I admit I was loooking for a cure of schizophrenia. I know the big book and twelve and twevle pretty good. I hung around people who said they don't need AA well I need it. I tried to quit klonopin cold turkey and was hospitalized worse withdraw ever I have have been threw it before. I'm stable now not only do I have the sciz I also have fibromalgia I'm in a lot of pain. Have I abused klonopin in the past yes I have but now the party over I'm not an klonopin attack I have dependancey. Coming of a psychotic break and mania tapering should be very slow. Day two not drinking I'm gonna go to AA today. Maybe someday I can help another schiz. I had 3 and a half years before the worst years of my life bondage to porn and gambling yes I struggle with lust but I have been making huge progress I love to play poker but I let it go. I'm a recovered opiate addict this is true I take vicodin to recover from hangovers for work. I have a right to recovery I earned and payed for my seat threw blood and tears I'm going baxk today> I quit talking to all my AA so called friends there sicker then me one worshipped saten come to find out scary. I want to recover but harbering resentments towards the people who told me not to take meds I forgive.My dad brother alcoholic my Mom alonon she's been so harmed by my dad and me and my brother. I'm very close with all my family why because of GOD working threw AA making willingly grow up and be a man. I take klomopin as perscribed the withdraw so intense it causes the schiz to flair up. I know I have very bad grammar need to study english. I have goals now I don't want to wallow in self pity very dangerous for an alcoholic.

Erratic

i would like to help but feel that what is best is your heard and im listening. take care xx

Cleansing

Wow, I feel your pain, and really want to write an essay to help. Clean time is personal. It's between me, my sponsor, and my Higher Power. And some people in the rooms say "nobody can take my clean time from me". This pamphlet helps me when I get confused.
https://na.org/admin/include/spaw2/u...%20Illness.pdf

It wouldn't hurt to ask your sponsors if they read the pamphlets mentioned in this thread, and if they could clarify the information.

I have Schizoaffective and I feel more comfortable in NA. I have a friend with Schizoaffective in AA and he prefers that fellowship. We agree to go where the love is at. And we are both moving upward.

I'm grateful I can be hyper, irritable, and delusional at times without using, hating myself, or refusing help today. It took abstinence and daily work to maintain that. I haven't had a bad day yet, just bad moments.

I found this book helpful too when I want a quick cure for everything I am diagnosed with(including addiction) :

dsmaxis10

Alcoholism porn gambling over eating opiate addiction I'm recovered from all except I'm a recovering alcoholic. I admit I have klonopin dependancy and am down from 3 mg to two mg in ten days I'm happy I'm stable sake sane sober. Fibromylagia is getting better no opiates I have down I;m allergic to them so when or if I'm not Spiritually fit I can cover my a--. I admit I feel the best I have in all my life. I'm on disability for schizophrenia schizoaffective type bipolar and now a month ago diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I admit I'm upset because mentally I could be working and making good money as a carpenter union and non but fibromyalgia I'm in pain. But self pity is dangerous for the alcoholic so I could go to school or something but I'm gonna take time and see if I can get the fibromalgia pain lower were I can work as a carpenter. I will have to go to journymen upgrade classes for something easier to do then rough framing. Sorry for bad grammer but I can build a hose out of wood. So life is good I feel like the drink problem has been solved recovered as long as I stay Spiritually fit I'll be fine. Just because I have the issues it's not a death sentance it means I have to be ALL IN with recovery.

red3215

I get a lot from AA even though I quit following the program and don't agree with The Big Book or members frequently.
I also do agree with members and The Big Book frequently. I think there is some line in there about taking what you can from the program and leaving the rest...or something.
But you might be better off just finding another program entirely.