How do you know if the diagnosis is correct, what questions do/did you ask?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New York
Posts: 393
How do you know if the diagnosis is correct, what questions do/did you ask?
Sorry, for long post, haven't posted in years, coming back into recovery, confused about MI issue.
I have 94 days clean, and I'm enjoying the ride. The main thing I'm doing wrong is abusing caffeine (5-7 cups a day since day one clean). It's a slow process for me, but I'm comfortable where I'm at. It wasn't a struggle to get clean, but staying clean has always been my downfall.
I had three years clean at one point. After my first year, I started seeing a therapist and psychiatrist and it was an awful experience. I left the office often feeling judged, unmotivated, and dissatisfied. They had no idea what was wrong with me. They thought I was Bipolar NOS, but my symptoms never improved. After frequent med changes and many poor personal decisions, I backed myself into a corner and my thinking got the best of me. I eventually relapsed and was out for two years.
I'm currently diagnosed as Schizoaffective, and having trouble accepting this diagnosis. It makes sense intellectually based on past symptoms, and the meds work decent, but there is so much unmanageability going on I'm frustrated. Obviously the caffeine is creating some unmanageability. I've done my research, and I'm experiencing a lot of symptoms of ADD. I read personal stories of people who abuse nicotine and caffeine to self-medicate ADD symptoms. I typically believe I use things because I'm an addict, but letting go of the coffee is very difficult. I don't really believe in self-medicating, but today I do. I know nothing about ADD/ADHD although, but have mentioned my symptoms to doctor.
When I went back to school last time I was clean and was only on two mood stabilizers(Depakote and Saphris), I was very unfocused, impulsive, unmotivated, couldn't manage time, nor properly plan anything. It was very stressful right before my relapse.
I'm currently on Latuda and Depakote at low dosages, but I never trusted the "outside help", and it's all a guessing game sometimes, and slows down the recovery process. Unfortunately, NA is not a social services network, so all my needs won't be met there. So I try to keep up both NA and my mental health treatment for now before i decide to completely go on self will and become my own doctor. Communicating feelings difficult for me. I'm a listener, not a talker.
Confused ... but feeling decent overall.
anybody had a similar experience with meds not working while being clean. What was the solution? I know very little about meds, been in therapy plenty of times, but it's not really my thing.
having trouble accepting my mental illness basically. See psych doc tomorrow, see therapist Thursday, maybe more will be revealed.
I have 94 days clean, and I'm enjoying the ride. The main thing I'm doing wrong is abusing caffeine (5-7 cups a day since day one clean). It's a slow process for me, but I'm comfortable where I'm at. It wasn't a struggle to get clean, but staying clean has always been my downfall.
I had three years clean at one point. After my first year, I started seeing a therapist and psychiatrist and it was an awful experience. I left the office often feeling judged, unmotivated, and dissatisfied. They had no idea what was wrong with me. They thought I was Bipolar NOS, but my symptoms never improved. After frequent med changes and many poor personal decisions, I backed myself into a corner and my thinking got the best of me. I eventually relapsed and was out for two years.
I'm currently diagnosed as Schizoaffective, and having trouble accepting this diagnosis. It makes sense intellectually based on past symptoms, and the meds work decent, but there is so much unmanageability going on I'm frustrated. Obviously the caffeine is creating some unmanageability. I've done my research, and I'm experiencing a lot of symptoms of ADD. I read personal stories of people who abuse nicotine and caffeine to self-medicate ADD symptoms. I typically believe I use things because I'm an addict, but letting go of the coffee is very difficult. I don't really believe in self-medicating, but today I do. I know nothing about ADD/ADHD although, but have mentioned my symptoms to doctor.
When I went back to school last time I was clean and was only on two mood stabilizers(Depakote and Saphris), I was very unfocused, impulsive, unmotivated, couldn't manage time, nor properly plan anything. It was very stressful right before my relapse.
I'm currently on Latuda and Depakote at low dosages, but I never trusted the "outside help", and it's all a guessing game sometimes, and slows down the recovery process. Unfortunately, NA is not a social services network, so all my needs won't be met there. So I try to keep up both NA and my mental health treatment for now before i decide to completely go on self will and become my own doctor. Communicating feelings difficult for me. I'm a listener, not a talker.
Confused ... but feeling decent overall.
anybody had a similar experience with meds not working while being clean. What was the solution? I know very little about meds, been in therapy plenty of times, but it's not really my thing.
having trouble accepting my mental illness basically. See psych doc tomorrow, see therapist Thursday, maybe more will be revealed.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
I havnt I am on anti anxiety/anti depressant I want to say nice to meet you
& big congrats on 94 days
I know what you mean I struggle big time accepting my mental health there is schizophrenia in my family and yeah I get what you mean
& big congrats on 94 days
I know what you mean I struggle big time accepting my mental health there is schizophrenia in my family and yeah I get what you mean
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 464
So they diagnosed you with schizoaffective disorder? I heard thats like some schizophrenia mixed with bipolar disorder. The schizophrenia comes in waves like bipolar disorder and can cause manic behaviors.
Do you not feel okay with this diagnosis? I'm not sure how I am with diagnostics, it depends on the therapist/psychiatrist. At first I was diagnosed with just major depression and anxiety and some slight compulsions. However this was diagnosed by taking a questionaire that involved answering over 100 different questions. It works okay however it didn't check for Pure OCD. The major depression and anxiety were the result of the root, my OCD. The therapist couldn't believe it so I left and got help elsewhere and got over some of the compulsions.
I'm still having issues with health anxiety which is very common with OCD but nonetheless I will be getting help for that soon.
As far as meds go, I'm not sure I took celexa for a short amount of time and it made things worse. There's other medication out there though and I heard you might have to try a few before you find one that works. I even tried anti-anxiety benzos and those just made me more depressed. Not to mention they are definitely not recommended for recovering addicts as those are very addicting to begin with.
I got over some of the OCD through therapy and I'm sure I could get over more of it with continued therapy. Perhaps you can switch therapists maybe?
Do you not feel okay with this diagnosis? I'm not sure how I am with diagnostics, it depends on the therapist/psychiatrist. At first I was diagnosed with just major depression and anxiety and some slight compulsions. However this was diagnosed by taking a questionaire that involved answering over 100 different questions. It works okay however it didn't check for Pure OCD. The major depression and anxiety were the result of the root, my OCD. The therapist couldn't believe it so I left and got help elsewhere and got over some of the compulsions.
I'm still having issues with health anxiety which is very common with OCD but nonetheless I will be getting help for that soon.
As far as meds go, I'm not sure I took celexa for a short amount of time and it made things worse. There's other medication out there though and I heard you might have to try a few before you find one that works. I even tried anti-anxiety benzos and those just made me more depressed. Not to mention they are definitely not recommended for recovering addicts as those are very addicting to begin with.
I got over some of the OCD through therapy and I'm sure I could get over more of it with continued therapy. Perhaps you can switch therapists maybe?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New York
Posts: 393
Thanks for the support and identification. I left the place I didn't like already. Glad that's over. It's best for me to stop doing research for now because a lot of this medical information on the web just makes what I have sound worst, and I end up feeling hopeless. Hanging in there quite well.
I recently started at a new clinic, and they have been helpful in these first 98 days. Due to my anxiety, my thinking became negative, and was struggling with people in general. Couldn't even trust sponsor or family. Luckily, only got rejected by one friend. That's an improvement for me.
It takes months to build a solid rapport with therapist/doctor. They need to learn about my patterns, I have to build trust. And like recovery, therapy takes work. Had awesome therapy and psych sessions this week. I went in with an open mind, and just answered questions honestly, and some deep stuff came out.
I often put high expectations of anybody trying to help, and push them away based on me feeling "misunderstood". I'm very early in recovery, I'm starting to learn who I am. But like many addicts, I just want what I want, and want it yesterday. They say once the fog has been lifted, I have to make my own decisions. I can listen to suggestions, but in the end it's on me.
Solution ...
Decrease coffee
Sleep earlier
Do some exercise
Continue to find out what makes me tick
Still struggling with coffee and sleep, but when I'm willing ...
I recently started at a new clinic, and they have been helpful in these first 98 days. Due to my anxiety, my thinking became negative, and was struggling with people in general. Couldn't even trust sponsor or family. Luckily, only got rejected by one friend. That's an improvement for me.
It takes months to build a solid rapport with therapist/doctor. They need to learn about my patterns, I have to build trust. And like recovery, therapy takes work. Had awesome therapy and psych sessions this week. I went in with an open mind, and just answered questions honestly, and some deep stuff came out.
I often put high expectations of anybody trying to help, and push them away based on me feeling "misunderstood". I'm very early in recovery, I'm starting to learn who I am. But like many addicts, I just want what I want, and want it yesterday. They say once the fog has been lifted, I have to make my own decisions. I can listen to suggestions, but in the end it's on me.
Solution ...
Decrease coffee
Sleep earlier
Do some exercise
Continue to find out what makes me tick
Still struggling with coffee and sleep, but when I'm willing ...
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 562
I have a problem accepting my diagnosis on a personal level. It annoys me that I have to take medication to be/feel normal and I too have made some really bad decisions......but I'm much better w my meds than wo them. I recently got a new therapist and upon meeting her was very disappointed......but it was only the 1st time so I'm gonna give her a shot. Your doing a fantastic job at sobriety. Don't give up.
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 397
I believe I have been misdiagnosed for many years now. It is troubling to say the least. I think doctors simply take a look at whatever symptoms you're having and slap on a diagnosis, without ever knowing the full story. I've recently determined that I think I have PTSD, which is much more in line with what I think. My counselor is on board and I think I am finally starting to make progress. I think figuring out the right diagnosis is important, it's been a big relief to me.
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