I need help
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 5
I need help
Hello,
I don't know if this is the right place for what I have to say.
I'm lost.
I have gone to ends length to distance my friends and family because I don't want them to see me this way.
I scared, I'm scared of what I'm capable of. I'm not myself anymore.
I am overwhelmed with waking up everyday and having to endure every second of unhappiness I know I am going to feel.
I hurt myself daily, I drink myself blackout daily, I cry daily and I desperately crave the strength to do something about how I am daily.
This is my first step. My first cry out to anyone who wants to listen.
I don't understand how to 'be' anymore, I don't know how to keep on keeping on.
There is no way through, around or beyond.
And I am just desperately hoping there is anyone out there that can give me the slightest hope that they are the same as me.
That I haven't lost all connection to humanity and am struggling on my own.
Please help me.
I don't know if this is the right place for what I have to say.
I'm lost.
I have gone to ends length to distance my friends and family because I don't want them to see me this way.
I scared, I'm scared of what I'm capable of. I'm not myself anymore.
I am overwhelmed with waking up everyday and having to endure every second of unhappiness I know I am going to feel.
I hurt myself daily, I drink myself blackout daily, I cry daily and I desperately crave the strength to do something about how I am daily.
This is my first step. My first cry out to anyone who wants to listen.
I don't understand how to 'be' anymore, I don't know how to keep on keeping on.
There is no way through, around or beyond.
And I am just desperately hoping there is anyone out there that can give me the slightest hope that they are the same as me.
That I haven't lost all connection to humanity and am struggling on my own.
Please help me.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Hello & Welcome Melody glad you found us I was once like this I want you to know
it's going to be ok
Have you thought of putting a plan together to help you stay sober ?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
Your not alone were here
it's going to be ok
Have you thought of putting a plan together to help you stay sober ?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
Your not alone were here
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi and welcome Melody
I'm sorry for the unhappiness that brings you here, but this is a great place of support and help.
Forgive the questions but I don't know too much about you or your story
do you have a regular doctor at all? have you considered seeing them at all for some help?
That first step to change and to asking for help is a difficult one to make - but it's so so worth it - and you're not alone Melody - this community will be behind you
D
I'm sorry for the unhappiness that brings you here, but this is a great place of support and help.
Forgive the questions but I don't know too much about you or your story
do you have a regular doctor at all? have you considered seeing them at all for some help?
That first step to change and to asking for help is a difficult one to make - but it's so so worth it - and you're not alone Melody - this community will be behind you
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 5
Appreciated
I am still figuring out how to reply properly.
Thankyou for your responses.
I saw someone today unwilling and sat there in silence for an hour.
When I say unwillingly, I mean against myself. A small part of me still wants to be saved but the majority of me is keeping myself back.
I have seen someone before but I couldn't deal with the overwhelming fallout of things that get surfaced.
I need to finally admit to no one in particular that I am scared.
Scared that I'm in this state and have no idea how to handle it.
Thankyou for your responses.
I saw someone today unwilling and sat there in silence for an hour.
When I say unwillingly, I mean against myself. A small part of me still wants to be saved but the majority of me is keeping myself back.
I have seen someone before but I couldn't deal with the overwhelming fallout of things that get surfaced.
I need to finally admit to no one in particular that I am scared.
Scared that I'm in this state and have no idea how to handle it.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
Originally Posted by Melody7 
I need to finally admit to no one in particular that I am scared.
Scared that I'm in this state and have no idea how to handle it.
Scared that I'm in this state and have no idea how to handle it.
You've taken a great step by coming here and reaching out for help, SR is a wonderful resource.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by Astro
Ever considered a recovery meeting, a group of anonymous people who are willing to offer support and experience?
You've taken a great step by coming here and reaching out for help, SR is a wonderful resource.
You've taken a great step by coming here and reaching out for help, SR is a wonderful resource.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
There are a lot of resources available, Melody. aa.org has meeting listings and hotline numbers for intergroups in your area. Most recovery groups have websites that can be easily located. I know it can seem a little frightening, but I found that the support I needed was waiting for me.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 9,004
Welcome Melody. There are a lot of wonderful folks here. They have a wide variety of experience and can give you some ideas.
Coming here and saying you are scared, unhappy, and drinking is a fine place to start.
Coming here and saying you are scared, unhappy, and drinking is a fine place to start.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 9,004
Hi Melody, I hope you are continuing to breath, put one foot in front of the other and do whatever you can with where and who you are. Life can be so darn difficult on so many levels. Come here and whine, cry, scream, complain and we will all listen to the best of our abilities!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Long Beach, California
Posts: 69
I hope you're feeling a little better, Melody. My heart hurts for those who are hurting...I've been there myself and am dealing with depression again. I can relate to your post in a lot of ways. I just made a post of my own looking for healthier, alternative choices instead of meds.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 60
I know exactly how u feel. I just joined SR a few days ago and I think my first post was titled scared and then another one I wanted to kill myself. The people here and their support got me through and gave me hope. Please stay give this a shot
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: WA
Posts: 24
Good place to start
Hi Melody,
I'm new to this site myself, and I'm here to say that you aren't alone. I've found a great deal of support here, and I know that you will too. Continue to post when you need to vent, and you will find your strength...I just know you will.
I'm new to this site myself, and I'm here to say that you aren't alone. I've found a great deal of support here, and I know that you will too. Continue to post when you need to vent, and you will find your strength...I just know you will.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
Originally Posted by Marylynn123456
I know exactly how u feel. I just joined SR a few days ago and I think my first post was titled scared and then another one I wanted to kill myself. The people here and their support got me through and gave me hope. Please stay give this a shot
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 60
Originally Posted by Melody7
Hello,
I don't know if this is the right place for what I have to say.
I'm lost.
I have gone to ends length to distance my friends and family because I don't want them to see me this way.
I scared, I'm scared of what I'm capable of. I'm not myself anymore.
I am overwhelmed with waking up everyday and having to endure every second of unhappiness I know I am going to feel.
I hurt myself daily, I drink myself blackout daily, I cry daily and I desperately crave the strength to do something about how I am daily.
This is my first step. My first cry out to anyone who wants to listen.
I don't understand how to 'be' anymore, I don't know how to keep on keeping on.
There is no way through, around or beyond.
And I am just desperately hoping there is anyone out there that can give me the slightest hope that they are the same as me.
That I haven't lost all connection to humanity and am struggling on my own.
Please help me.
I don't know if this is the right place for what I have to say.
I'm lost.
I have gone to ends length to distance my friends and family because I don't want them to see me this way.
I scared, I'm scared of what I'm capable of. I'm not myself anymore.
I am overwhelmed with waking up everyday and having to endure every second of unhappiness I know I am going to feel.
I hurt myself daily, I drink myself blackout daily, I cry daily and I desperately crave the strength to do something about how I am daily.
This is my first step. My first cry out to anyone who wants to listen.
I don't understand how to 'be' anymore, I don't know how to keep on keeping on.
There is no way through, around or beyond.
And I am just desperately hoping there is anyone out there that can give me the slightest hope that they are the same as me.
That I haven't lost all connection to humanity and am struggling on my own.
Please help me.
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