Dee74

last part here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-19.html

D

bblackbirdflyy

Night Dee.

Casey, what I meant was I will not be posting as much due to getting ready for the trip and being on the road. You are right, I should check in long before my "first temptation." just came out wrong , I think. ;-) Grats on 42 days!!!

Welcome back SnoozyQ , I'm sorry to hear of your relapse but am happy you are joining our class, 2 years sober is something to be proud of for sure! And LucyLOO too!

SnoozyQ

Thanks blackbird :-)

Noolan

Day 16.
For those feeling like they have flatlined and they don't still have that magic of the early days of soberity, I'd say that's completely natural. Someone told me early on in my recovery that getting sober is the easy part, then comes life. Little did I know how true that would be. My 9 months off was a myriad of good and bad. For most addicts/alcoholics, there's a deeper reason we were self medicating beyond our addiction. Once you're sober, you will face these demons head on; self discovery and growth is an amazing experience. It's not with out its emotional pitfalls, however.

All I can say is, hold on. You will come out the other side a better person. I'm drawing on the 9 months today and finally accepting I'm an alcoholic/addict. I had hoped smoking weed or other substances would allow me a recreational/social high without addiction. While these substances didn't lead to the down turn booze does, they were a hollow attempt at filling a void that still remained from the lack of booze. If I'm going to really make this work, I'm going to be free of all substances(less nicotine or caffiene, nicotine is on the to do list to quit). That was my personal discovery and just an example of how even dry, it took another relapse to realize all the work I did over 9 months wasn't in fact enough. I'm taking my lumps and hoping for a better outcome this time. Much love, Nolan.

Stubbs16

Welcome bac Snoozy and Easyr, and anyone else coming bac, or just joining.

I'm so glad I stood my ground last pm with AV, because 2day I'm enjoying a normal, fine, sober day. Got a lot of things to do, and so glad to make this day a productive one, not a hungover, or drunken one.

It was rough going, but I made it. It proves to me I can do this. I can't always control or change some situatuons, but I can choose how I react to them. This knowledge gives me much hope. I just have to keep moving forward.

Easyrider

I'm working on a daily mantra/prayer kinda thing to remind me what I am so I never forget. It's cheesey so I'm not sharing. But hopefully it will work. Also, I've used various methods and techniques to not drink in the past but rather than using one or picking a choosing or whatever I'm going to use all the skills I have learned at my disposal. The most powerful so far is AVRT and posting on this forum daily. But I've also written a list of quite a few other coping strategies. I really need to read the urge surfing article Dee keeps kindly providing. Maybe I'll do that tonight!

Noolan

My first go around, I bought a necklace with my sobriety date on it. Early on it was very helpful as I literally had the date around my neck. I had it under my shirt and it was just for me. If the AV or anything in my brain was telling me to drink, I would literally grab it and look at it. Hard to run from your past when it's draped around your neck. Come to think of it, I'm going get another. I learned other ways to cope with my triggers, but I'm back here again, so maybe that would have helped.

Easyrider

Woah. So I've been feeling good today. Then bang on 5pm. The thoughts start. I tired remembering I'm an alcoholic, well alcoholics drink, there's nothing you can do about, you were going to try and bottle of wine yesterday, you can drink that in an hour so really, it's not that bad, you've had it this month start agin next month, might as well enjoy one more day of drinking, the real problem will be Friday so start then, on and on I was in a trance, going to drink, inevitable, then out of no where, like some one slapped a massive sign saying AVRT in my face, I recognised the addictive voice, amazing, lucky and amazing, the thoughts stopped immediately. So just thought id share that and next time I won't nearly be caught out again, there's a voice now saying "I'll get you" how sinister is that!? Screw you beast. I see you. ��

Easyrider

That's cool Noolan. I'm going to put my sobriety date in my sig. The key for me will be to never forget why I'm doing this. And allow the thoughts to creep back in thinking they're mine, AVRT is perfect only if you recognise it and don't forget, that's what got me last time. 142 days. I can't remember the exact thoughts but it was probably, wow , you're cured, you can drink normally now, it's summer, haven't caught up with friends in a while,mill go out for a few beers, to hell with it might as well smoke a bit too you can always use AVRT to stop again anytime you want, that resulted in pretty much 2 years of constant drinking every day, God please never again!

YuriO

Noolan, your post about flatlining, here comes life came at a good time for me. Yesterday, I looked back at my first stint here at SR. At some point, I stopped counting days, and started counting weeks. I had made 10 weeks. I didn't make it to the point where I start counting months. I wrote a to do list in my usual first smoke of the day chair this morning. I realized that my ex and thoughts of reconciliation, and regrets for the breakup are triggers for me.

I'm going to take a more active role in my recovery this time. No day without a post. Each day, I'll strive to be better, and to learn something new about myself. I really appreciate all the support on here. I'm really hoping, for all of us going through this together that we find greater happiness, and are able to inspire others with our story, like we've been inspired by others here. 11 days, here, going on two weeks. Personally, I look at others numbers who are higherand it does motivate me, and keep me going. Thanks.

Noolan

I take a throw everything and see what sticks approach: AVRT, AA, therapy, and Buddhism all seem to keep me grounded. Oh and SR! AA is just when I need FaceTime with others. I've never "worked the program".

mcfearless

Great idea. My friend is making me a ring. I'll ask him to scribe the date on it. I'll wear it on my drinking hand.

JL2014

Hard hard day at work. Can't wait to crash land early in the bed. No drink today. Checking in-

mebutmuchbetter

Good morning day 7. Feeling positive about today and the weekend. I have some plans in place and I am going to enjoy a sober weekend of doing things.

Had some urges yesterday as the end of the week is approaching. Luckily I like cooking so I just stuffed my face

Soberwolf

Easyrider

Still sober :0)

mayg

Day 1 :-(
So cross with self
Mayg

CaseyW

Glad you came right back in, mayg. Care to share what happened?

Stubbs16

Today was a good day. I got a lot done, but more then that, I was able to be there, in the moment.

My Mom is 80, and in poor health. She has health issues, and on a limited income. I was able to take her to the places she needed to go 2day, without worrying if my bac was too high? Freedom! Yes!

I never drove while on a spree, but in a blackout state, who knows what one will do? So, it was so nice to be there for her. I also visited my grandkids.

All in all, sober days are the best! Working on many more.

Mayg, keep at it. Sorry, I know those down moments, but you are back already. That is a good sign. Stay with us. It will get better.

Soberwolf

MayG have you got a sober plan for recovery ?