Hereandnow2

I sent an email amends to someone I no longer see or have regular contact with. It was very thorough and from the heart. Is this ok? Sponsor says it's ok as a last resort .

Fly N Buy

Good for your on the willingness to make amends........that's indeed the key!!
And Happy one year of sobriety HereandNow2!!!

Awesome!

Joe Nerv

Ammends I was taught isn't about apologizing, but about doing our best to right the wrongs we did. What I've found however is that it's sometimes tough, if not impossible to do that. In such instances for me the quality of the ammends became dependent on my sincerity, and willingness to act differently in the future. If that's all there, I'm good.

Whether or not the email was sufficient is between you and your HP. Nobody else can make that call. IMO, of course .

Mountainmanbob

Sure, more than fine. Possibly someday you will also be able to do the same in person.

MM

Hereandnow2

Thank you for replies! I got no response from either one! I guess that's ok though

Gottalife

The best person to decide what form the amends should take is the injured party. They will let you know, if you ask, what you need to do.

The fact that neither responded suggests that they did not regard your approach with the same importance as you did. A one sided written amends is no substitute for a face to face meeting explaining the whole circumstances including the fact that amends is a life and death matter for you, and allowing them to respond. A written amneds, especially by email, would likely just be deleted if it was me that was hurt. Where is the contrition? Where is the humility, where is the demonstration that we have truly changed.

Email amends to me sounds self serving, unless of course there was no other way of communicating. A hand written letter by post would be better.

WMJ1012

I make email amends only if there's a reason I can't see the person face to face.

biminiblue

never mind. Old thread.