Class of April 2014 Part 17
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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Formerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Third. 
Bad obo, not letting free win.
hehe
I've had some good night's sleep free, just family crap. I can only accept the things that I cannot change.
I refuse to let others bring me down.
Have a great day everyone!
Bad obo, not letting free win.
heheI've had some good night's sleep free, just family crap. I can only accept the things that I cannot change.
I refuse to let others bring me down.
Have a great day everyone!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
That's for sure UP, I'm learning a lot about acceptance too. Eckhart Tolle suggests we "be friendly towards the present moment, whatever form it takes.
My present moment has just been hijacked by a very irritating television being switched on, so I've removed myself to the bedroom. I hope the tv breaks down soon, I might accidentally pour some water over it in the not too distant future.
Acceptance...... hmmmm, not easy.
My present moment has just been hijacked by a very irritating television being switched on, so I've removed myself to the bedroom. I hope the tv breaks down soon, I might accidentally pour some water over it in the not too distant future.
Acceptance...... hmmmm, not easy.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
Morning everyone,
December looks like it's going to be busy, both at home and at work.
I'm Just planning to do the best I can, without getting frazzled. Advent should be a peaceful time of year, but it gets hijacked by consumerism. I'm aiming for peace.
Peace to all April Fools.
December looks like it's going to be busy, both at home and at work.
I'm Just planning to do the best I can, without getting frazzled. Advent should be a peaceful time of year, but it gets hijacked by consumerism. I'm aiming for peace.
Peace to all April Fools.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,315
Hey Fools,
Obo's still in pain, but its manageable.
According to the recovery progress, Im doing pretty well.
Swelling and bruising not too bad....
Ice and elevation seem to be the key!
Been reading a lot of posts on here, of the fools over the journey since April.
What a ride.
Wife is well, morning sickness has almost passed. She's starting to look really well and pretty happy too.
When Obo starts whinging about the pain, she immediately lets me know she's about to have a baby!
mmm......
Been interested in other's posts on xmas and family and relationships and that...
My cousins, uncle, the family are coming and I need to really be strong and set a principle in motion that I can stand through all of that without needing a drink. I can see it in my mind, but still there's a part of me that wants/has doubt/glorifies the idea of having a drink with them all.
Crazy when I read all that I have written and been though in the past 7 months.
But I guess that's the name of the game............
stay tuned....................
Obo's still in pain, but its manageable.
According to the recovery progress, Im doing pretty well.
Swelling and bruising not too bad....
Ice and elevation seem to be the key!
Been reading a lot of posts on here, of the fools over the journey since April.
What a ride.
Wife is well, morning sickness has almost passed. She's starting to look really well and pretty happy too.
When Obo starts whinging about the pain, she immediately lets me know she's about to have a baby!
mmm......
Been interested in other's posts on xmas and family and relationships and that...
My cousins, uncle, the family are coming and I need to really be strong and set a principle in motion that I can stand through all of that without needing a drink. I can see it in my mind, but still there's a part of me that wants/has doubt/glorifies the idea of having a drink with them all.
Crazy when I read all that I have written and been though in the past 7 months.
But I guess that's the name of the game............
stay tuned....................
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
Obo, I'm pleased your knee is healing to plan, and Mrs Obo and baby Obo are doing well!
Christmas will be interesting that's for sure. The mind is devious isn't it? It says "oh how lovely it would be to sit by the fire with a glass of......?" But what it doesn't say is the truth which is "how awful it would be to ruin all of my hard work, and end up red eyed, tired, talking rubbish, and making a fool of myself in front of my family this Christmas."
I'm preparing for the onslaught with military precision. Lots of really tasty non alcoholic drinks so I don't run out, and only just enough wine for the guests.
How's everyone else managing the Christmas season?
Hope everyone's had a good day.
Christmas will be interesting that's for sure. The mind is devious isn't it? It says "oh how lovely it would be to sit by the fire with a glass of......?" But what it doesn't say is the truth which is "how awful it would be to ruin all of my hard work, and end up red eyed, tired, talking rubbish, and making a fool of myself in front of my family this Christmas."
I'm preparing for the onslaught with military precision. Lots of really tasty non alcoholic drinks so I don't run out, and only just enough wine for the guests.
How's everyone else managing the Christmas season?
Hope everyone's had a good day.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 361
Hey all, I've had a really long few days so I'll be back later, but I'm on day 2 now. I think a big difference for me is how "successful" my drinking was. No blackouts, no making a fool of myself, no real consequences. In fact most people don't know. But instead of the fear that "successful" drinking is going to make me convinced I have a handle on it, instead I felt like the "successful" drinking showed how much I didn't have a handle on it. Sure I didn't do anything to overturn my world, but I was fighting every single moment with myself. Almost every single moment of drinking I felt like I was walking on the edge of a cliff. Drinking is like playing with a bomb. Sure, this time it didn't go off and hurt anyone, but next time it probably would. I'm too old and too tired to be playing with fire. I know the question is "what will you do differently?" and I'm not sure yet. I'll let you know when I've come up with a new plan. But renewed commitment to sobriety and to the fools bargain.
For now I will say that while I feel like I have a good handle on step one... the past few weeks have taught me if nothing else that everything that was unmanageable about my life was linked to alcohol and my life isn't easy but it is manageable without it... I don't have a good handle on step 2. I'm not sure how I feel about AA but from all of the reading I'm done, when dealing with this kind of psychic struggle, a large part of being resilient is having faith in something. That is a big one I've been struggling with. I think there are some people who become grandiose in drink. I'm not one of those people. I feel like I become very small. Very small and very afraid to ask for help when I feel afraid for fear that it will ruin this illusion I have in my daily life of seeming very together. I've always been reluctant to admit that I don't have a handle on things. I need to be better about asking for help and get a little more faith in my life. It's easy for me to admit to my successes. It's harder to admit to my struggles.
Anyway, hope everyone is having a good week. I'm in pretty good spirits, just don't want to mess up the good thing I've had going. Very far from throwing in the towel over here.
For now I will say that while I feel like I have a good handle on step one... the past few weeks have taught me if nothing else that everything that was unmanageable about my life was linked to alcohol and my life isn't easy but it is manageable without it... I don't have a good handle on step 2. I'm not sure how I feel about AA but from all of the reading I'm done, when dealing with this kind of psychic struggle, a large part of being resilient is having faith in something. That is a big one I've been struggling with. I think there are some people who become grandiose in drink. I'm not one of those people. I feel like I become very small. Very small and very afraid to ask for help when I feel afraid for fear that it will ruin this illusion I have in my daily life of seeming very together. I've always been reluctant to admit that I don't have a handle on things. I need to be better about asking for help and get a little more faith in my life. It's easy for me to admit to my successes. It's harder to admit to my struggles.
Anyway, hope everyone is having a good week. I'm in pretty good spirits, just don't want to mess up the good thing I've had going. Very far from throwing in the towel over here.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
I feel like I become very small. Very small and very afraid to ask for help when I feel afraid for fear that it will ruin this illusion I have in my daily life of seeming very together. I've always been reluctant to admit that I don't have a handle on things. I need to be better about asking for help and get a little more faith in my life. It's easy for me to admit to my successes. It's harder to admit to my struggles.
Hope the pain eases for you Obo...have been thinking of you.
Thinking of all of you
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
(((((Mariah)))))), hope your Mum feels better soon. That must have been a scary scenario for you all.
Rocks and Mariah, sounds like you're tweeking your strategy really well. I know this year is your year to regain your health and vitality. It will be so helpful to get a few weeks under your belts before 2015 starts, then you'll know that your body has had time to cleanse itself fully.
Have you listened to the TED talk by Brene Brown? She's studied "vulnerability" it really is quite liberating to hear her talk about allowing ourselves to be vulnerable (ie happy with our own flaws). For me, my spiritual life has been a major factor in my sober journey.
I'm off to the dentist this morning for a check up (I hope). I'm looking forward to that being over. Then I'm visiting my parents. I feel lucky to work reduced hours so I can support my parents at the moment. It's as good as it can be really. I just need to keep sober and I'll be able to face whatever is ahead. I might not like it, but I will be able to accept what is.
Let's all finish this year strong.
Rocks and Mariah, sounds like you're tweeking your strategy really well. I know this year is your year to regain your health and vitality. It will be so helpful to get a few weeks under your belts before 2015 starts, then you'll know that your body has had time to cleanse itself fully.
Have you listened to the TED talk by Brene Brown? She's studied "vulnerability" it really is quite liberating to hear her talk about allowing ourselves to be vulnerable (ie happy with our own flaws). For me, my spiritual life has been a major factor in my sober journey.
I'm off to the dentist this morning for a check up (I hope). I'm looking forward to that being over. Then I'm visiting my parents. I feel lucky to work reduced hours so I can support my parents at the moment. It's as good as it can be really. I just need to keep sober and I'll be able to face whatever is ahead. I might not like it, but I will be able to accept what is.
Let's all finish this year strong.
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 3,233
Prayers for your Mom Mariah.
My Grandpa had some mini strokes this summer which was part of the reason my Gran went to the nursing home. I don't think I posted it here but she fell in the nursing home Saturday morning and broke her left arm and hip. She had surgery on both Sunday.
I'm glad I'm sober and not drinking over it. It's a rough time at the moment but I don't want December to be a blur of drunkenness, hangovers ans anxiety.
to you all. Rocks and Mariah I am so glad you are right back here after slipping. You both sound strong and ready to beat this for good this time.
Obo I hope your knee keeps feeling better. I'm so excited about little Obo!
I'll try to be better about posting. I've been lurking though! Have a great day everyone!
My Grandpa had some mini strokes this summer which was part of the reason my Gran went to the nursing home. I don't think I posted it here but she fell in the nursing home Saturday morning and broke her left arm and hip. She had surgery on both Sunday.
I'm glad I'm sober and not drinking over it. It's a rough time at the moment but I don't want December to be a blur of drunkenness, hangovers ans anxiety.
to you all. Rocks and Mariah I am so glad you are right back here after slipping. You both sound strong and ready to beat this for good this time. Obo I hope your knee keeps feeling better. I'm so excited about little Obo!
I'll try to be better about posting. I've been lurking though! Have a great day everyone!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Chick, my thoughts and prayers your Gran will be on the mend soon.
Freein, and Mariah,.... what a blessing y'all are sober to be there fully for the challenges your moms are facing.
My mom fell a couple months ago in assisted living and broke her wrist,...and finally got moved back in her little apt. in assisted living after about 45 days in a different place across the street. Like Chick mentioned, I can't imagine going through this stuff in a blur of drunkenness.
Rocks, ...your ambivalence seems to have diminished, ...that one thing was the biggest leap for me to finally get through.
Obo, ....your wife has a point there !
Keep the faith man, ...keep doing what you're doing and this holiday season will work out fine with your family coming in town.
Izzy, .... have a feeling things are pretty busy down there in Cowtown !?!
Freein, and Mariah,.... what a blessing y'all are sober to be there fully for the challenges your moms are facing.
My mom fell a couple months ago in assisted living and broke her wrist,...and finally got moved back in her little apt. in assisted living after about 45 days in a different place across the street. Like Chick mentioned, I can't imagine going through this stuff in a blur of drunkenness.
Rocks, ...your ambivalence seems to have diminished, ...that one thing was the biggest leap for me to finally get through.
Obo, ....your wife has a point there !
Keep the faith man, ...keep doing what you're doing and this holiday season will work out fine with your family coming in town.
Izzy, .... have a feeling things are pretty busy down there in Cowtown !?!
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
Thank you for prayers & thoughts for my Mom All - She is doing well, had a follow up today with scan of throat was good & her blood pressure good.....she is a very independent woman (always the caretaker) & as a 50 year, pack a day smoker, is wearing a nicotine patch, which is a big deal, as quieting smoking has been a big "sore" subject with her for years. Good for all of you making that decision
Had my intake appt for counseling this afternoon where I did a "recap" of the last 40 years of my life...very exhausting & at the end she told me someone would be contacting me in the next 3 weeks.....gave me a flyer for a "coping skills" class I could go to (during my work hours).
(hugs) to ALL
Had my intake appt for counseling this afternoon where I did a "recap" of the last 40 years of my life...very exhausting & at the end she told me someone would be contacting me in the next 3 weeks.....gave me a flyer for a "coping skills" class I could go to (during my work hours).
(hugs) to ALL
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Too far up North
Posts: 284
Hello everyone. I should be going to bed but thought I'd get on and post first.
Freein I think I do need to put some space between the impusle and the action and I should take advantage of the option to post on here and talk it out. I don't know why I didn't except probably I didn't want to stop myself at the time. God knows I wish I did and hope to next time.
MG I'm glad your mom is OK.
I haven't ordered the anxiety and phobia workbook yet. I don't know why. I probably should.
I've been working out lately and it is helping me feel much better.
Freein I think I do need to put some space between the impusle and the action and I should take advantage of the option to post on here and talk it out. I don't know why I didn't except probably I didn't want to stop myself at the time. God knows I wish I did and hope to next time.
MG I'm glad your mom is OK.
I haven't ordered the anxiety and phobia workbook yet. I don't know why. I probably should.
I've been working out lately and it is helping me feel much better.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
Good morning all,
Mariah, sounds like you're making some strides in the right direction. A skilled counsellor could make the world of difference. Hope it goes well.
Soli, I think your reflection about not checking in to SR is a useful insight. I know exactly what you mean, it's a cycle that had me stopping and starting for years!. For years I had the thought that I wanted to quit drinking, I knew I "should" quit, but it didn't become a "I HAVE to quit" until this time. And that new perception has made all the difference.
The "should do" became a "have to" when I truly realised that I couldn't be the person I wanted to be while also numbing out regularly. I realised I was a "pretend person". The persona I was trying so hard to display to the world was fake and really hard work to keep up.
I feel I'm now the person I was born to be. It hasn't taken long. It's a wonderful feeling to be happy with who I am, flaws and all. In fact I've never felt such inner freedom.
I suppose, it's about having a compelling reason to be alcohol free. Once we have a reason so intrinsically important then a true decision becomes much easier, and there's no reason to turn back.
I hope this is helpful, if not please ignore.
I'm off to work, it's busy, busy now until Christmas.
Have a great day all.
Mariah, sounds like you're making some strides in the right direction. A skilled counsellor could make the world of difference. Hope it goes well.
Soli, I think your reflection about not checking in to SR is a useful insight. I know exactly what you mean, it's a cycle that had me stopping and starting for years!. For years I had the thought that I wanted to quit drinking, I knew I "should" quit, but it didn't become a "I HAVE to quit" until this time. And that new perception has made all the difference.
The "should do" became a "have to" when I truly realised that I couldn't be the person I wanted to be while also numbing out regularly. I realised I was a "pretend person". The persona I was trying so hard to display to the world was fake and really hard work to keep up.
I feel I'm now the person I was born to be. It hasn't taken long. It's a wonderful feeling to be happy with who I am, flaws and all. In fact I've never felt such inner freedom.
I suppose, it's about having a compelling reason to be alcohol free. Once we have a reason so intrinsically important then a true decision becomes much easier, and there's no reason to turn back.
I hope this is helpful, if not please ignore.
I'm off to work, it's busy, busy now until Christmas.
Have a great day all.
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