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Class of August 2013 - Part 14

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Old 11-18-2014, 04:21 PM
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Class of August 2013 - Part 14

last part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-13-a-20.html

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Old 11-18-2014, 06:22 PM
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Else, never feel like you can't talk to us. We feel deeply for you and truly understand your pain. Glad you are seeing someone new.
It's amazing now during this healing process me are finding lots of reasons why we embraced drugs or alcohol to give us piece of mind for a short time. Hope you continue to feel better.
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Old 11-18-2014, 08:11 PM
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We're here for you, Else.

What you wrote didn't entirely surprise me. I've often thought there was a pain there that went very deep.

I think you're courageous. And I think you'll get through this storm.

All my thoughts are with you.

V.
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Old 11-21-2014, 05:55 PM
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Well, we are tied with the Class of August 2014 for the number of parts to our posts.

Those chatterboxes.

How is everyone?
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Old 11-21-2014, 07:08 PM
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Haha V, we're a quiet group.. but we carry a big stick!

I'm back in the States for a couple of weeks, from SE Asia. Have some business to attend to, my annual physical, and Thanksgiving with my brother in Phoenix. The trip over was longer than usual - 35 hours due to flight delays and a poor choice of airlines on my part. But unlike the old days, these things don't upset me much anymore.. I simply enjoy a book, or just looking around and observing things, wherever I am.
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Old 11-22-2014, 01:39 PM
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I worked all day today making Xmas wreaths with my church group. What a great feeling when you volunteer yourself. Except for my feet!

adv, I think 35 hr would be unmercifully ! You must be jet lagged ? I did 13 to China and thought it agonizing ...

Tried a great receipt if you eat pork.
Pour a can of Apple pie slices in the bottom of a baking pad, place 4 pork chops on top, cover with stove top stuffing,made to directions...bake at 375 for 35 min, uncover, bake 10 min more....everyone loved it!
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Old 11-22-2014, 02:30 PM
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Yum!

Hope everyone has a great weekend
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Old 11-22-2014, 09:20 PM
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That sounds like a lovely way to spend the day, Oceanlady. Welcome back to the states, temporarily, Adv!

Picked out the new tile for the kitchen. Not sure when the job will get done. The contractor I'm working with got the bid on a job he'd been up for before I contacted him so it won't be immediately. And that, as Stuart Smalley would say, "is okay." Am in love with the new stuff I picked out.

I'm not much for parties, but just got back from a small gathering (just seven of us) of former co-workers tonight at the house a friend and her husband just finished restoring. Stunning home -- an old prairie-style place -- and they did a terrific job. A really nice evening -- loads of laughs and good conversation. It's good to be at a point where seeing others drinking wine doesn't faze me. Still ... sat next to an old friend who was going from tipsy to more than that. Slurring words, getting kind of emotional, over-sharing.

I'm glad to be sober.

Take care, all.
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Old 11-22-2014, 10:32 PM
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Haha, oversharing.. lol..
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Old 11-22-2014, 10:43 PM
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Haha, oversharing.. lol..

so many things I'm grateful for.. and not doing things like that is one of them.

I just discovered my tenants have a dog, even though I have a no pet rule as my home had damage before from pets, that took a lot of work to undo. A neighbor mentioned seeing someone walking a dog, so I swung by tonight and looked in the front door side glass and saw the animal relaxing, lol. A beautiful pit bull mix or something.. sigh...

I love dogs but they tend to repeat previous pee damage, which in my case required replacing wood trim and subfloor in a couple of areas... and I have allergies. So I was extremely clear about the no pet policy. And I had to lower the rental price because of course everyone looking at a 4 bedroom home wants to bring pets.

I was pretty upset at this because I dont like being lied to and taken advantage of. But I've decided to wait until Monday and see if the property management firm didn't eff it up before blaming the tenant. Or see if it's temporary.. Then maybe go meet the dog and see if something can be worked ot.. Grrr..
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Old 11-23-2014, 05:30 AM
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Love the over sharing ! Think I did a lot of that. enjoy your renovations, I love to have a project like that. My only advice is choose a dark grout! Hate cleaning grout!

Adv, why do people take advantage like that. Here , if you own a pit bull you may pay high rental insurance. Don't know about a mix.
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Old 11-23-2014, 05:31 AM
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Love the over sharing ! Think I did a lot of that. enjoy your renovations, I love to have a project like that. My only advice is choose a dark grout! Hate cleaning grout!

Adv, why do people take advantage like that. Here , if you own a pit bull you may pay high rental insurance. Don't know about a mix.
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Old 11-23-2014, 07:53 AM
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Meet the queen of over sharing! But sometimes you just have to get it all out. Ah, the relief.

Adv, ( fingers crossed ) just maybe it's a good dog and pees outside. You can only hope. Truthfully that's a bummer about the dog. Your rugs, for instance? Hard wood floors? You hate to be the evil landlord but I'd be mad, too. I have dogs and half my housework is dog related. And many renters aren't going to do it.
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Old 11-23-2014, 12:33 PM
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Originally Posted by Oceanlady View Post
Adv, I think 35 hr would be unmercifully ! You must be jet lagged ? I did 13 to China and thought it agonizing ...
Hi Oceanlady, I always route myself with stops to avoid the super long flights, which I think are unhealthy.. unless you can afford business class, lol. I do spring for seat upgrades if nec, to get more legroom.

So this trip involved 4 flights, the longest being the 10 hour leg from Tokyo to SFO. That's bad enough.. I refuse to take any of the 13 hour flights through Hong Kong or Korea, even though that's the most expedient way to get to Cebu, the island I'm currently living on.

That said, it does take longer this way, although this trip was ridiculous, lol. I had some long layovers. And yes, I'm jet lagged.. but I took a yoga class this morning, which should help.
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Old 11-23-2014, 01:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Elseware View Post
Meet the queen of over sharing! But sometimes you just have to get it all out. Ah, the relief.
Oh, my lovely friend, trust me. You are just fine.

Now, re: last night, detailed gynecological discussion.

Trust me, you don't overshare, Else, you don't.
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Old 11-23-2014, 06:39 PM
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Pea soup fog in these parts this morning. I went to a nearby park and did some experimenting with my camera.

Hope we all have a peaceful, healthy and sober week. -- V.


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Old 11-23-2014, 07:11 PM
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Fantastic pic, V.
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Old 11-24-2014, 04:37 PM
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Beautiful pic, V. Looks like it should be in an art gallery. The gathering sounds fun. Isn't it amazing how you can pick up on changes brought about by drinking when you're sober? Everything becomes crystal clear.

Else, I am late catching up on posts, but wanted you to know that I was so moved by what you wrote at the end of our last thread and am glad that you shared. I think we've discussed on these boards before about how pain and trauma do not know chronological time--what we experience sets in deeply. Shining light on it can only help you move through it and transform.

I have been in an icky head space lately and have been terribly mean to and critical of myself. I will go back to jr. high and replay horrid memories, then onto high school and so on. Geez Louise, it's horrible. And of course, all of the terrible acting out while drinking. I definitely did my share of oversharing too. As I try to sort through some of this negativity, I wonder if there's a reason for this critical self-doubt...is this part of the process of forgiveness? Of acceptance? Or am I just thinking too much? Am I supposed to learn something from all of this or work on just letting it all go and living in the present? Am I hard-wired to have so much negative self talk and just need to be constantly vigilant, as in maybe this is just who I am and so I have to find strategies to change my stinking thinking? Lately I have been over sensitive and quick to feel slighted. Eew. I wish I could get away from myself, and then I start feeling like maybe no one wants to be around me because I'm so horrible. Of course, I have no evidence for that and outwardly relationships or work seem fine, but I feel insecure. Maybe my co-dependent tendencies are creeping out and need to be addressed. Dunno. We have some time off for Thanksgiving break and I'm hoping that getting back to consistent yoga will shake me out of this.

Blah. Sorry to be Debbie downer.

That's a tough one about the dog, advbike, and it sounds like you're doing the right thing in waiting until Monday to get some more information. Keep us posted.

OL, that recipe sounds delicious. I want to do some baking over the break...I found a recipe for lemon-blueberry cake that sounds yummy.
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Old 11-24-2014, 05:01 PM
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Kadidee, all that negative self talk sounds very familiar. It's what I do. I don't know what the answer is. I know now I used to deal with it by using drugs and drinking. Which I think is a significant insight. I'm hoping the new therapist can help me. She specializes in this sort of thing. Maybe you could find someone to help. Also, l'm learning to gently ask myself to stop when I notice I'm running myself down. This is hard, though, and I usually just tell myself to shut the **** up. That's the kind of state I can get myself into just by self talk. Try not to be so hard on yourself. You don't deserve this, you know. We all see you for the very dear person you are.
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Old 11-24-2014, 06:25 PM
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I do some old nutty regretful memories sometime when I can't sleep. Daytimes, not often. I usually go for a head shake on them. Else, I kinda think you're working a version of AVRT there which may be quite effective with practive. I'm quite vile when I speak to my Beast. It deserves it.
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