kat1973

I am somewhere between the critical and recovery phase of a recent (3 months) serious depressive relapse. I am on 150 mg Effexor and Diazepam 5 mg PRN for anxiety and panic. I live alone.

My family is pressuring me to move closer to them, for support or in case of emergency. Also, part of me wants to move as my ex moved out 2 months ago, which increases the lonliness. I'd like to start afresh, no reminders of the relationship.

I have just returned to work after a 3 month absence, that has been stressful and tiring.

I also have a very good MH team and other services supporting me. They only service my district, I would lose this support and would have to start again > further interuption to my treatment.

I have rented here for 2.5 years, other than the place being cluttered and a mess > struggling to keep it together, it is safe, I know my neighbors and the landlord has never given me problems.

It is in fact only a 20 minute drive to mum (although she doesn't drive), 10 to my sisters ( she doesn't bother with me) and my brothers in laws are literally a 2 minute drive from here. He visits them frequently but does not come by.

So I ask, what would be the point right now knowing that I will be compromising my treatment and would have to deal with more stress.

I am so confused, unsure, indecisive...

Dee74

Sounds to like you've weighed up the pros and cons and are leaning towards a decision to stay put Kat?

D

MidnightBlue

Hi, Kat.

I hear you about struggling to make a decision and being insecure and confused.

You've made your assessment of pros and cons - and staying at the current place makes more sense, IMHO.

But it also helps to just sit still with yourself a little bit, "turn off" logic and what other people want, and listen to yourself - what FEEL GOOD for yourself? This inner voice is often smarter and wiser than our logic, and will give you right direction.

I hope you'll make a choice which will benefit your treatment and inner balance.

Best wishes to you)

kat1973

Thanks D.

Yeah, I think it's best and then I can see how I feel in 3 months.

I am making a plan to declutter (gradually of course). I have plenty of storage space here, so I plan to store some items I don't use often. Anything that has not been used for 12 months, I will donate to charity.

I figure if I make my space more livable, I'll be more at peace. I hope I can do this.

kat1973

Thanks MB.

My inner voice is confusing the s*** out of me at the moment lol. I think "no" decision is the best thing right now.

Hugs x

chicory

Kat,
I know this may sound silly, but could you get a pet? I hear that if you have a therapist recommend it, your landlord may honor it more readily, as theraputic?
I do not like living alone! If I was, without a pet in the house, I'd go bonkers, as I love having the companionship.

After a divorce, years ago, I was so lonely, even though my children lived near. I would cry a lot, too much time in my head. One day, I rescued a lovely girl kitty, and my life was so much better!

Just something that made a difference for me.

Time is a wonderful thing... it helps make decisions easier sometimes. Maybe wait for the answers to become clear. It seems that if I rush to decide something, I feel uneasy, as you are doing. Maybe that is a sign to wait for more clarity?

Just a day at a time.

best wishes to you,

kat1973

Thanks Chicory

I forgot to mention that I have a beautiful baby girl kitty that I couldn't live without. She loves this home, big front yard for her enclosure where she watches & stalks the birdies.

Moving would be a stress for her & I wouldn't want to put that on her unnecessarily. I love her dearly!

Also I agree that forcing oneself to make a decision is extremely anxiety provoking. I think I need to let it go, the answer will come naturally.