Class of April 2014 Part 5
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 361
Hi all, it's May! Yay!
It's been a blur of activity for me but now winding down on day 3! The sleep is still bad and the anxiety is still buzzing, but things are looking a little sunnier. Crossing my fingers for an actual night of sleep.
Applekat, I saw on the previous thread the bit about cinco de mayo. I work with kids, which is usually an alcohol free conversation zone, but today everyone was chuckling about alcohol filled piņatas. Sigh. It made me nervous about this weekend as I too have a friend's birthday party of Saturday and am worried it will turn into a "fiesta." Weekend's are always when I screw up. But I'm hoping that being super clear about my intentions to not drink will help. Drinking holidays combined with birthdays. Too much. But hey, if it gets to be too much, I suppose it's not the worst thing to get out of dodge and just say I have to cut out early!
It's been a blur of activity for me but now winding down on day 3! The sleep is still bad and the anxiety is still buzzing, but things are looking a little sunnier. Crossing my fingers for an actual night of sleep.
Applekat, I saw on the previous thread the bit about cinco de mayo. I work with kids, which is usually an alcohol free conversation zone, but today everyone was chuckling about alcohol filled piņatas. Sigh. It made me nervous about this weekend as I too have a friend's birthday party of Saturday and am worried it will turn into a "fiesta." Weekend's are always when I screw up. But I'm hoping that being super clear about my intentions to not drink will help. Drinking holidays combined with birthdays. Too much. But hey, if it gets to be too much, I suppose it's not the worst thing to get out of dodge and just say I have to cut out early!
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Dee , I was wondering why I lost all my "quote buttons there , for a while !?!
This was my last post, but it's trailing back in Part 4 now , ...oh , my goodness ;;;;
Originally Posted by izzy8
Kitten- your name and pic together- lol! Just hit me funny for some reason.
Izzy , ...same here !
That kitty looks like a well fed, pampered indoor kitty, who's just seen something his instinct tells him he should be chasing; ...but that activity is so foreign , ...his body's not moving ;, ...still mulling the situation !?!
Speaking of foreign, .....my addiction tells me topspin not drinking falls firmly in that category. Even though my history won't support, ..not one shred of it's lies. And I loved to mull the situation, ...nothing like a little chin scratching reflection with a drink in my hand. "oh , so deep" my addiction reminded me. Absurd , huh !??
My ambivalence may be at the root of my addiction. I knew I should quit drinking , but I didn't. If I had no ambivalence, there'd of been no problem - -- drink up , guk, guk, guk ..... with no downside. woohoooo!
There was a time like that, .... long ago,
,,... that's where my addiction had me ,,..., stuck with past memories of good times instead of the soul wrenching dark place that had become my reality, ....once I finally stepped back , and got as honest look at it, as I could muster, anyway.
I'm trying my best to separate all the sneaky ways my addiction ( my desire to drink ) with my true self, ........that part of me that wants to survive , and move on in a healthy , progressive way , not only for me , but everyone in my life. It seems like it should be easier than it's turning out to be.
I'm big into underestimating things , and even bigger , at overestimating my abilities !! ?? ! LOL
Izzy , I hope you were were joking about me , and wise , in the same phrase !?! Cause that's a real good one !!!
Being part of this April Class reminds me I'm not the only one , you guys give me great confidence I can do this once and for all. Witnessing y'all changing your lives , real time , ...is a gift,
......an amazing gift.
Y'all remind me ,some days I may have nothing but hope , .
....
I'm trying to remember; ..as long as I can still put my hand in my pocket, my addiction has no power over my motor skills. It might drive me a little nuts upstairs , but it can't force me to bring a drink to my lips.
ok , y'all .
Any thoughts I have on this stuff come from standing on the shoulders of folks, like Dee, and many others here at SR , plus the old timers I met years ago at meetings; ..... who really "get" this stuff, ...the folks who once were just like us , ,,,some well worse off, ... but a miracle happened , ....
This was my last post, but it's trailing back in Part 4 now , ...oh , my goodness ;;;;
Originally Posted by izzy8
Kitten- your name and pic together- lol! Just hit me funny for some reason.
Izzy , ...same here !
That kitty looks like a well fed, pampered indoor kitty, who's just seen something his instinct tells him he should be chasing; ...but that activity is so foreign , ...his body's not moving ;, ...still mulling the situation !?!
Speaking of foreign, .....my addiction tells me topspin not drinking falls firmly in that category. Even though my history won't support, ..not one shred of it's lies. And I loved to mull the situation, ...nothing like a little chin scratching reflection with a drink in my hand. "oh , so deep" my addiction reminded me. Absurd , huh !??
My ambivalence may be at the root of my addiction. I knew I should quit drinking , but I didn't. If I had no ambivalence, there'd of been no problem - -- drink up , guk, guk, guk ..... with no downside. woohoooo!
There was a time like that, .... long ago,
,,... that's where my addiction had me ,,..., stuck with past memories of good times instead of the soul wrenching dark place that had become my reality, ....once I finally stepped back , and got as honest look at it, as I could muster, anyway.
I'm trying my best to separate all the sneaky ways my addiction ( my desire to drink ) with my true self, ........that part of me that wants to survive , and move on in a healthy , progressive way , not only for me , but everyone in my life. It seems like it should be easier than it's turning out to be.
I'm big into underestimating things , and even bigger , at overestimating my abilities !! ?? ! LOL
Izzy , I hope you were were joking about me , and wise , in the same phrase !?! Cause that's a real good one !!!
Being part of this April Class reminds me I'm not the only one , you guys give me great confidence I can do this once and for all. Witnessing y'all changing your lives , real time , ...is a gift,
......an amazing gift.
Y'all remind me ,some days I may have nothing but hope , .
....
I'm trying to remember; ..as long as I can still put my hand in my pocket, my addiction has no power over my motor skills. It might drive me a little nuts upstairs , but it can't force me to bring a drink to my lips.
ok , y'all .
Any thoughts I have on this stuff come from standing on the shoulders of folks, like Dee, and many others here at SR , plus the old timers I met years ago at meetings; ..... who really "get" this stuff, ...the folks who once were just like us , ,,,some well worse off, ... but a miracle happened , ....
Formerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Kat you are not gonna fail this weekend, we won't let you. Try to have a plan and leave yourself an out if things get too tough.
Night MrG. congrats on day 2 down
Soliloquy you and chick should try to come up with a plan for this fall. Don't want to go that long and slip then.
Rocks congrats on making it through day 3. Also the info to kat above goes to you too.
Hope everyone made it through May Day ok.
Night MrG. congrats on day 2 down
Soliloquy you and chick should try to come up with a plan for this fall. Don't want to go that long and slip then.
Rocks congrats on making it through day 3. Also the info to kat above goes to you too.
Hope everyone made it through May Day ok.
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 3,233
What a day!!! I just got my oldest two off for the weekend. So this afternoon I came home to drop off groceries and throw some food in the crockpot for dinner before I went to get my kids and take them to their drop off spot. When I was putting the groceries away I ran across half of a fifth of rum (not my drink of choice).... so I threw it in the freezer (figuring hubby would drink it at some point) and went about doing everything else I needed to do. Through out all of that and driving my kids where they needed to go (30 minutes away) I thought about that rum.... and thought about it... and thought about it..... when I got home down the hatch it went!!! ..... not my hatch the kitchen sink!!! I just didn't want to think about it anymore!
Now I'm going to make some green iced tea in my new chicken cool gear cup I got as a treat to myself today.
Thinking of you all, hoping you are having a good day. :hugs:
Now I'm going to make some green iced tea in my new chicken cool gear cup I got as a treat to myself today.
Thinking of you all, hoping you are having a good day. :hugs:
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
I am sure I missed some updates earlier but what is happening this fall Chick/Soliloquy?
Also btw I ran today first time on my injured foot since Saturday. Only 1 mile. The vain part of me is ticked that now that I'm finally not having my wine, I'm injured and can't workout properly. Oh well. Focus. Focus.
Also btw I ran today first time on my injured foot since Saturday. Only 1 mile. The vain part of me is ticked that now that I'm finally not having my wine, I'm injured and can't workout properly. Oh well. Focus. Focus.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Rocky Mountains
Posts: 31
Not gonna lie, classmates, I thought about it today.
After the grandkids left AV whispers, "Two fingers of scotch wouldn't hurt anything." So I cycled through my ever-growing list of reasons why I quit, grabbed a bottle of Pellegrino, and headed to the deck to listen to the birds.
It's a good day to be sober.
After the grandkids left AV whispers, "Two fingers of scotch wouldn't hurt anything." So I cycled through my ever-growing list of reasons why I quit, grabbed a bottle of Pellegrino, and headed to the deck to listen to the birds.
It's a good day to be sober.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
Good Decision Re-Boot. Mine was screaming at me on my way home. Just playing it through....know exactly where it will take me & not going there today.
The desire today comes from a combination of things.....something really good "came through" for someone I've been helping (reward)....Its one of those first beautiful summer days (nostalgia) & I have a list of things that I feel I "have" to get done this evening (pressure on myself to make everything the way I think it should be).
I did a bit of reading a friend suggested, drank something NA & headed out for a drive with my dog to go pick up my weedeater..... Will check in with you all later.
The desire today comes from a combination of things.....something really good "came through" for someone I've been helping (reward)....Its one of those first beautiful summer days (nostalgia) & I have a list of things that I feel I "have" to get done this evening (pressure on myself to make everything the way I think it should be).
I did a bit of reading a friend suggested, drank something NA & headed out for a drive with my dog to go pick up my weedeater..... Will check in with you all later.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
Mariah - thinking it through - playing the tape forward - that's exactly what I am doing to avoid cravings. It really helps, right!? And I can SO appreciate the nostalgic feelings. Nice afternoon out? I wish I had a glass of crisp white wine to enjoy in the sun. Problem was, I started associating nearly everything with having a drink. Oy vey.
To be content
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 80
Have a confession to make I fell off the April wagon, not the drinking one, but checking in here with us Aprilers, Springers...do we have a nickname? Not sure why I fell away, didn't mean to leave you guys. I hope all is well everyone though!
Way to go for dumping out the rum ChickChick. It is so easy to cave in those situations, best to dump it out. I do that if it's in the house or have an event coming up that may involve drinking. It can consume the mind until we figure a way to either drink it, or avoid it. A college friend wants to go out for reprieve Saturday. We used to bowl or play pool with drinks of course. I'm thinking of telling her how about movie for a change from the norm. I just know the bar is going to be too much pressure for me. My AV can't be quiet about it though. Planning-contemplating can be exhausting, but the drinking is worse, right?
Big ol' sober cheers for making it to May 1 everyone!
Way to go for dumping out the rum ChickChick. It is so easy to cave in those situations, best to dump it out. I do that if it's in the house or have an event coming up that may involve drinking. It can consume the mind until we figure a way to either drink it, or avoid it. A college friend wants to go out for reprieve Saturday. We used to bowl or play pool with drinks of course. I'm thinking of telling her how about movie for a change from the norm. I just know the bar is going to be too much pressure for me. My AV can't be quiet about it though. Planning-contemplating can be exhausting, but the drinking is worse, right?
Big ol' sober cheers for making it to May 1 everyone!
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